If you are in a crisis, please call for help: 1-800-273-8255, or 1-800-784-2433 (available 24/7). More resources available here.

I Want to Kill Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 764 People

    Life brings nothing but suffering.

    I want to die. That is my one and only wish. And yet I'm forced to keep living.
    ayako18 ayako18
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Oct 2, 2014

    Where to Start??

    Too many bills.  Mortgage in jeopardy.  Wife doesn't know.  Married 20 years.  Little to no sex. 2 Kids failing in school.  No money for college.  Mother with Alzheimer's.  Mother-in-law wants to move in.  Former star athlete now morbidly...
    Rael Rael
    46-50, M
    1 Response Oct 22, 2007

    I hate my life. I posted here maybe a year ago

    saying the same thing, and not much has changed. I hate my existence. I hate my appearance. I hate the way i stutter and speak so quietly. I hate how boring i am. I hate how untalented i am. I hate how im not good at anything. I hate that i have no friends nor will i ever. I...
    sittingprayingwaiting sittingprayingwaiting
    22-25, M
    2 Responses Jun 7, 2015

    I am useless and worthless I have nothing to

    live for im a failure but at the same time I want help I want to leave but then I want to stay someone help me??? Please??
    Useless95 Useless95
    22-25, F
    Aug 12, 2015

    I Wish I Was Dead - Read This If You Are Hopeless!!!

    ~~~~~EDIT May 2nd - READ THIS ENTIRE POST - Life is not hopeless. I thought it was too. Read this entire post and the comments. I don't know where to start. I think that I should clarify that I don't want to kill myself, I just wish I could stop living. Before...
    dammit075 dammit075
    9 Responses Aug 24, 2009

    It gets tiresome to keep trying to kill myself

    with no success. And now it appears im running out of time to do it.if I don't do it and succede soon I'll have to suffer and feel the pain of losing the people I love.i know thatll ill lose them anyway if I die but If I die I wont have to feel it.i wont have to watch them...
    deleted deleted
    5 Responses Oct 12, 2014

    I Will Try And Hopefully Succeed Today To Die

    i have trie over 30 times and i have been saved more than once, sometimes its a neighbour a family member a friends  but im always somehow savced. it got to the point the police came rnd for a cup of tea(or thats what they said) really it was to check i was ok. Now iv moved...
    goingcrazzydaisy goingcrazzydaisy
    22-25, F
    Sep 13, 2010

    This could hurt some people

    but it doesn't matter, I can't take it anymore. Men kill themselves way more than women in every country in the world. If people actually cared about men's pain then this wouldn't be the case. Don't bother responding, I won't be coming back.
    ofudgeme ofudgeme
    Jul 5, 2015

    been thinking about it

    for a while. Had the gun to my head several times but every time i do it i get closer and closer. Eventually i will do it no a whim or by accident. I'm miserable, I feel worthless and nobody likes me.
    Jacksoncw Jacksoncw
    22-25, M
    1 Response Apr 29, 2015

    been thinking about it

    for a while. Had the gun to my head several times but every time i do it i get closer and closer. Eventually i will do it no a whim or by accident. I'm miserable, I feel worthless and nobody likes me.
    Jacksoncw Jacksoncw
    22-25, M
    3 Responses Apr 29, 2015

    I had enough of life

    and life is coming to an end. I am going to die tonight
    Mark350 Mark350
    36-40, M
    12 Responses Mar 27, 2016

    I Have Had Enough

    nothing matters anymore. cutting and burning isn't working. i am ruining everything. what is the point of life? there is none. at least not for someone as worthless as me. please stop trying to convince me life is worth living. i get tired of it. so i am going to commit suicide...
    LelouchZero LelouchZero
    18-21, T
    3 Responses Jan 19, 2011


    Yesterday I went through my dad's Pharmacology books in search for drug concoctions that will end my life, shortly coming to the realization that attaining those drugs are almost next to impossible. Mom has bought about 80 sleeping pills from Bangladesh, I believe they are called...
    umathena umathena
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Jan 13, 2008

    I want to end it. This depression is

    so hard to live with, even when there is nothing to be depressed about.
    vtborn12009 vtborn12009
    Oct 5, 2015
    Calamityy Calamityy
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Jan 15, 2016

    I really want to kill myself!

    Maybe I should go to the Humber bridge and throw myself off it, or go to the White Horse and throw myself off a cliff!
    IFeelSoLonely101 IFeelSoLonely101
    22-25, M
    Oct 23, 2015

    Right Now..someone Kill Me.

    I don't care how. shot me,stab me, i don't care how i die. i just want to die right now. I just want to pop all the pills in the house but if that does not work. ill just get my dad's gun out his room if he didn't lock it up...
    BrokenButterflies BrokenButterflies
    18-21, F
    8 Responses Jul 11, 2010

    I'm suicidal, I need help

    and I have no idea where to turn to.
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Feb 2, 2015

    Always Thought About It

    From the moment I could understand death, I've wanted to kill myself. I like to experiment and to me, death is the ultimate experiment. I'm not afraid of it and I'm not afraid to end my life yet something always holds me back. I've tried, though. I overdosed on my medication and...
    iLostMySoul iLostMySoul
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jun 16, 2012

    I Only Joined This Group

    To let everyone know what it is that I have learned; I committed suicide December 17th 2003. It was my goal to die, to never come back, but I did. I wish with 101% of my heart that I hadn't made such a selfish choice at the time. Someone once told me suicide is a permanent...
    angeldelinkwent angeldelinkwent
    26-30, F
    8 Responses Sep 20, 2009

    My Name Is Nobody

    I'm not happy with myself. I have emphysema and copd, plus really bad arthritis in my hip. I cant get around very good. If I don't keep busy I sit around and think way to much. I had a thought tonite that if about 90% of americans had time to actually sit and think about there...
    Nobody2568 Nobody2568
    41-45, M
    2 Responses Oct 23, 2012

    Really want to kill myself.

    But then my brain was all like, hey, eternal hellfire and I was like ****. So now I'm still here, despite the weighty bullshit of circumstance. And the daily hallucinogenic pstd like visionsexperiences, where I will see and feel myself die in some other random sadistic way. Like...
    MrRoach MrRoach
    18-21, M
    Mar 27, 2016

    I Am A Total Failure

    Is there anyone who can relate to someone that is a complete failure and who wants to just die for that reason.   I would like to know methods to kill myself.   I've been teased and picked on all my life, and feel I don't feel like living. Can anyone...
    crazyjan crazyjan
    51-55, M
    5 Responses May 4, 2010

    I've felt this way for

    so long and it seems like this is the only way out. I'll try. I'll try more, I'll try different kinds of therapy, but it all seems so pointless. I just want to die.
    waterteacoffee waterteacoffee
    18-21, F
    1 Response Nov 27, 2015

    I am tired of being alive.

    I want to buy a shotgun but I don't have the money, I just need a part time job for one month and that should have enough. I want a girlfriend so badly. I want to be hugged and kissed and told that I'm loved. Id love to take a beautiful girl out to dinner but I'm ugly now and I...
    Thefightingangel Thefightingangel
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Sep 12, 2015

    I've had depression and anxiety

    since 9 and taken every medication on the doctor's prescription pad to try and alleviate it. Nothing works though, on top of this I'm broke, soon to be homeless, possibly sent to prison for a victimless crime and feeling completely worthless and as if nothing ever gets better...
    thebasedgod05 thebasedgod05
    22-25, M
    Feb 12, 2016
    deleted deleted
    Mar 14, 2016

    A while ago I've ordered Nembutal over Internet

    and got it seized by customs ... SO that the only available option now is to travel somwhere I can find and buy Nembutal in person ... I'm planning to go to Peru ...I know where it can be found/bought there ... But I feel I need someone with me to go throgh all this ... If we...
    mybygone mybygone
    51-55, M
    1 Response Mar 12, 2015

    Does anyone know? Sitting in your bed,

    just staring at a blade knowing you're worthless. Saying "I want to go home", "please take me home". Knowing you had your home, in his arms but he left you. Does anyone even really like you? Is it all a facade? Why do people promise they won't leave, then do? You can only help...
    suiciderxxm suiciderxxm
    18-21, F
    Nov 18, 2015

    When I was 17, I decided

    that I was going to end my life. I locked myself in my room, took a rope, tied one end to my closet door and fastened the other around my neck. My vision began fading immediately from the lack of oxygen, but I was never in any pain. Yet, I changed my mind and that was the worst...
    BestForLast92 BestForLast92
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Jun 1, 2015

    Hi I'm 29 and I'll try to make this long story

    short I have PTSD I'm manic depressant I have severe anxiety disorder I have borderline personality disorder I've had one of the worst childhoods I've ever heard of and I want to die I've started preparing myself for this as I've already gotten one full bottle of pills after i...
    Bgtanker Bgtanker
    31-35, M
    1 Response Jan 1, 2016

    I Am All Alone In This World

    I have no family,I have no friends. When I get really lonely, I go to my phone and call any of these people I used to know and have not 1 person. I do have a boyfriend,but he's about to leave me.He said he wanted to get married but then never asked and never said happy...
    justlikemebutbetter justlikemebutbetter
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Apr 28, 2013

    I'Ve Tried

    I've tried so hard, so much, so often, but to no avail I've failed in ever single one of my attempts. I've always been a pretty depressed kid actually. I've had the sh!ttiest childhood which I mention in all my other negative stories as well. It's really messed with my head and...
    deleted deleted
    6 Responses Apr 4, 2013

    So much anxiety and depression.

    I couldn't even finish school last week, I walked off campus early after realizing I couldn't concentrate with all the anxiety attacks. Home life sucks. Everything's filthy and broken and nobody really cares here. I feel like nobody does or should care for me. One of our...
    CloudedDreams5 CloudedDreams5
    22-25, F
    1 Response Feb 21, 2016

    Wanted to do this for awhile now.

    I set a date in september when hopefully I'll be able to do it. I'm trying to force myself to stick around and see a few things through before I finally free myself. I'm best man for a friends wedding over the summer, certainly don't want my death to ruin his wedding plans. Also...
    awais87 awais87
    26-30, M
    Apr 27, 2015

    Not because I have anything terribly wrong

    happening in my life, just because I don't enjoy living right now. I know that I have enjoyed living. There are happy memories that I can remember, and I've laughed a time or two. It's just that I really don' like being forced to go through these times of, shmeh meh ker shmeh...
    exileoftheabyss exileoftheabyss
    22-25, M
    1 Response Feb 11, 2016

    I Feel So Alone...

    I always feel like killing my self, im just too much of a wimp to do anything about it, i dont like pain even if it means things will get better. My two bestest friends in the world just ditched me for no reason, 1 day we were closer than ive ever been to anybody, next they...
    jenny95 jenny95
    18-21, F
    1 Response Oct 14, 2009

    I'm paralyzed due to a spinal cord injury I

    suffered when i was 18. I'm constantly in pain and I'm alone. I've been in love, but I've never been loved back and I never will. I'm also a doctor and have become increasingly disillusioned with my work. I see patients like me, and I lie to them that they're going to be ok...
    awais87 awais87
    26-30, M
    Jan 31, 2015

    I Want To Disappear

    I think about it since i was 15, when my granpa died. Since then i think nobody understands me and like me and that even my parents would be better off without me here. I wasn't a bad child but my mum is really agressive, we always argue. She always tells me that i am useless...
    lovelessbutterfly lovelessbutterfly
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Oct 23, 2009

    Everyday... I Want to Kill Myself...

    In the mornings I wake up... look out of my window... see the sun shining, birds chirping... I feel what a wonderful day today is... I come out of my room, see the accusation in the eyes of my parents... I'm fat, ugly, stupid, dumb, useless, "a bad influence"... I...
    iniquitousangel iniquitousangel
    22-25, F
    7 Responses Aug 8, 2009

    Been Thinking Of Dying...

    hi, my name is may and i'm 18 years old right now.   I have been thinking about killing myself for a long time now...from what i could still remember, i try killing myself since a kid around the age of 7. I have try killing myself by overdosing myself, hanging myself, stop...
    mayvaaj mayvaaj
    1 Response Oct 23, 2009


    I often fantasize killing myself. I think to my self, what seemingly innocent contraptions I have in my proximity that will enable me to achieve this goal. I think I am one very pathetic individual who is too ******* scared and dumb to do the deed. I am an idiot and a stupid...
    umathena umathena
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Dec 9, 2007

    Do you ever feel like things just keep getting

    worse? No matter how many times people tell me things will get better, they just never do. Things just snowball, and on and on the depression grows, slowly obliterating any trace of me that might still be left, till I'm nothing but a numb, empty shell of my former self. I just...
    londonteen20 londonteen20
    22-25, M
    Nov 24, 2015
    amador01 amador01
    46-50, F
    3 Responses May 22, 2015

    I'm in college and just failed two huge exams I

    had today. I understand that isn't the end of the world, but I've become unbelievably overwhelmed by everything that I'm doing. I'm taking 21 credits, have goals to lose weight, and overall just be more social to have a better social support system. Every chance that I seem to...
    Tracy2144 Tracy2144
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Oct 2, 2014

    Life sucks big time. **** life.

    I wish I can just end my miserable existence. I was never meant to exist to begin with, my existence is a mistake. I'd rather shower in cyanide than life another day.
    SoulCoffee SoulCoffee
    26-30, M
    Oct 25, 2015

    I have always had suicidal thoughts,

    but recently I find myself thinking more about killing myself and ways to do it. I don't want to, but life is just **** and I feel everyone would be better off if I wasn't around.
    hungateshead hungateshead
    41-45, M
    Mar 4, 2016

    I Want To Kill Myself, I Want To Put A Plastic Bag On My Head And Tie The Handle Around My Neck

    I can't stop thinking about killing myself, I think about it everyday now and I don't see a real point to life. I met this guy and I fell completely in love with him, no other guy has made me feel like he does. Everything was great at the start but then things changed I fell...
    Sammylee1979 Sammylee1979
    Jun 18, 2012

    I really don't need to live anymore.

    I cannot find joy or happiness in anything in life. I have been miserable for too long, and it is time to be in peace. I want drink alcohol, take. 5 percocets and 3 xanax pills. Will that kill me? I don't want to have a failed suicide attempt.
    jvd19xx jvd19xx
    18-21, F
    Apr 10, 2015

    I used to only consider ending my life last year

    but now the urge to do it has gotten bigger. I can't see myself changing how I feel, and I can't see myself escaping the issues and reasons to why I just hate living. I know it may be selfish but when I have no happy future ahead then I don't see the point suffering through it...
    rcmh171822 rcmh171822
    18-21, F
    Dec 24, 2014

    My name is Ashlie, I'm 22

    and am a housekeeping supervisor. I'm sorry I don't really know where to start but I guess I can start by saying I constantly think about suicide. As far as I can remember I've tried or thought about it. When I was a child I tried hanging, drowning and choking my self but I...
    ashlieisstillhere ashlieisstillhere
    22-25, F
    4 Responses May 20, 2014

    I have been thinking about suicide almost

    everyday for awhile.. and a part of it sounds really relieving...I have battled depression for pretty much my whole life... Its just really hard for me to be happy.. the only time i am ever happy is when I smoke weed, I like to gamble too..
    shitfaced77 shitfaced77
    22-25, M
    3 Responses Dec 29, 2015

    Sometimes like today,

    my mood switches from normal (well normal on antidepressants, that is) and I just am so sad I want to die. Saying I want to die gives me some relief. But I am not going to yet. I want to track my moods because I have just read that certain chemicals, metals, hormones etc can...
    clouds4208 clouds4208
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jun 9, 2015

    I suppose the title is a little misleading.

    I don't exactly want to kill myself. Not all the time at least. What I really find myself wishing for is to vanish. Poof! And disappear into thin air without leaving a trace, without hurting myself physically or others emotionally. I can't kill myself. I'm a coward. I'm afraid...
    Aifos212 Aifos212
    22-25, F
    Aug 20, 2015

    I'm sorry this may be quite confusing to some

    of you. I just want to know if anyone knows my cousin cory. Big into anarchy, revolution, ron paul. He lived in Philadelphia, PA close to Norristown. He would've been on here about a year ago, just let me know
    jmlin jmlin
    22-25, F
    Aug 2, 2015

    Guilt Is What Keeps Me From Killing Myself

    i care about everyone and i bend over backwards for everyone but it never seems like its enough. i have hated myself for a very long time and have thought of committing suicide for years. it is my love for everyone else and my caring about what everyone else will think that...
    inconsolablenumbness inconsolablenumbness
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Aug 14, 2012

    I want to kill myself.

    I can no longer justify my existence and endure the never ending of severe psych-ace and overwhelming sense of hopelessness. I used to believe that if I worked hard and be a decent human being I should be able to achieve my American dream by becoming a contributing member of...
    eggheadincmu eggheadincmu
    46-50, M
    Apr 7, 2014
More Stories