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I Want to Recover From Bulimia Nervosa

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 181 People

    Trapped

    I tried to get help, went to an eating disorder clinic, had one appointment, arranged a series of appointments but then had a bit of a panic and cancelled all of them. I Convinced myself afterwards that I didnt need them, I did ok for a good while, told myself that i dont care...
    pine90apple pine90apple 18-21, F 3 Responses Oct 30, 2009

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    When you wake up in the morning

    and want to rip your body off When you wish to be invisible When your value comes from the amount of space you take up When the whole meal you just want to be rid of fulfillment Please remember You deserve even more You deserve space You deserve acceptance You are enough No...
    dutyface dutyface 22-25, F Jan 29

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    Keep Messing Up...

    I dont understand how this happened....Everything was fine.I woke up and did pilates with my mom,sister,and aunt in a gym...Then I carefully measured my lunch and a little fruit for desert.For the first time I felt fine after eating,but after 2 hours I was hungry again...Then I...
    MiaRapedMe MiaRapedMe 16-17 1 Response Aug 9, 2012

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    New Here And A Bit Nervous

    Hi to anyone who might be reading this... I have undulated between anorexia and bulimia since I hit puberty and I am now 22... At the moment I am in a severely bulimic phase but apart from my family (who I don't live with currently) nobody knows and it feels like a massive burden...
    charlotte349 charlotte349 22-25 2 Responses Jun 26, 2013

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    My Biggest Wish Is To Recover.

    My biggest dream is to recover bulimia. I'm tired of the shame.I'm tired of the fear.I'm tired of my lies and bad excuses.I'm tired of stealing the food from my siblings and parents.I'm tired of going to bed late because of homework I haven't finished because of bulimia.I'm...
    rikkegade rikkegade 18-21, F 3 Responses May 15, 2012

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    Today is a bit of a struggle

    but I know I can break this. I have to keep strong.
    lolinghappily03 lolinghappily03 22-25, F Jan 30, 2014

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    I have been struggling

    for a few days now and the binge aspect has been a bit overwhelming. I have realised that I just need to keep focused and live in the moment- because this is the most important one and one which you will never get back (a little cliched I know). I have realised that there are...
    lolinghappily03 lolinghappily03 22-25, F Jan 29, 2014

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    I Need Help...

    I've been bulimic for 5yrs now. I've hit a low point lately. I moved to a new city where i didn't know anyone, and with no one always around I've been more actively bingeing and purging and i just feel like I've hit rock bottom. Someone please tell me how you've beat this.
    7fromheaven 7fromheaven 18-21 3 Responses Oct 21, 2008

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    Is Anyone On Tumblr?

    http://fracturedgirl.tumblr.com/post/20978060369/so-i-just-started-a-new-blog-password-protected - I'm needing some people to provide some emotional support, if at all possible. :( I tried some of my irl friends and family, and only one cares.As for internet friends, only 1 on FB...
    afracturedgirl afracturedgirl 31-35, F Apr 16, 2012

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    That Was A Close One...

    I ALMOST binge/purged. My fiance was gone allll day. I didnt eat all day until 4:30. I was starving... I made a small meal.. Banana with 80 calorie bun and fake low cal peanut butter. After eating it I felt more hungry and wanted to binge sooo bad!! But I didnt! So proud of...
    o0kymmie0o o0kymmie0o 26-30, F 2 Responses Apr 15, 2012

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    Struggiling With My Recovery From Bulimia

    I have been dealing with this horrible disease for over 10 years and I desperatly want to be cured, I have a wonderful husband and a wonderful 3 year old that I want to live for. I had a very rought child hood that I think triggered this disorder so that I could have some control...
    jakobsmommy0513 jakobsmommy0513 26-30 4 Responses Jul 29, 2012

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    This Is The Year

    Bulimia has stolen six years from me........I remember having so much control over food, I was orthorexic. Nothing deemed unhealthy would ever pass my lips and anything that did had to be "earned" by exercise.One day I think I cracked and ate a whole box of cereal bars...
    ladyEm ladyEm 26-30, F 5 Responses Jan 8, 2010

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    Confessions of a Bulimic

     (TO ALL THOSE WHO SUFFER FROM BULIMIA NERVOSA...YOU CAN RECOVER <3)   It all started when i saw myself through the eyes of others. when people laughed at me, mocked me, bout my weight, about how fat and ugly i was. this happened on a daily basis and i kept...
    Skam Skam 18-21 6 Responses Jul 11, 2009

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    Unstoppable

    i recently developed bulimia on a regular basis. its all i can think about and its in the early stages, because i want to stop and know its bad but i cant think of any way else to not think that way. all i want to do is get the food out any way i can and i just began binging...
    schecter2 schecter2 18-21 4 Responses Oct 26, 2008

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    Guilt Ridden

    I have a personal history of obsessive and compulsive behaviors. I have struggled with bulimia and anorexia since I hit puberty. I have never really been over weight. I’m not really over weight now, and this keeps me from being honest about my problems. I am a 28 year old...
    VlizabethV VlizabethV 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 31, 2012

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    Hello, gods and goddesses.

    .... I have struggled with bulimia for over 6 years: daily binging and purging, alcohol abuse, stealing, anxiety, and depression. Before that, it was a solid 10 years of self-contempt and endless criticism, uncomfortable in my skin. I am done struggling, though. Now, it's not...
    ElementYogi ElementYogi 26-30, F 2 Responses Sep 18, 2014

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    One Step Forward, One Step Back.

    Heyy! ..I'm Gemma. 11 was the age in which my bulimia first kicked in. I vividly remember feeling out of control of my eating habits and I thought bulimia would be a way if controlling my food obsession. I was so wrong. 20lbs heavier, 5 years later and one purge too many, I am...
    wishfulthinking1 wishfulthinking1 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 16, 2013

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    A Bitter Smile, A Sore Throat

    At the age of twelve, I was hospitalized for about three months with anorexia. I was about 5' 2" and I'd whittled myself down to a sixty-seven-pound skeleton. Fortunately, I put enough weight back on to avoid welcoming any significant physical damage. Unfortunately, the smallish...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 10, 2011

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    My Friend

    someone very special to me tole me recently about her having bulimia and wanting to recover from it. i want to help her i but i dont know how. i've started reading all the forums i can find on the subject but i guess what would really help is some advice from people who have or...
    dunnowhattodoo dunnowhattodoo 16-17, M 1 Response Nov 4, 2012

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    Staying Positive

    3 weeks binge/purge free. Feels so good!
    o0kymmie0o o0kymmie0o 26-30, F 4 Responses Jan 24, 2012

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    My Bulimia Exposé!

    The problem with bulimia is that it's more than an illness; it's an addiction, and like with any addiction, it makes it impossible for you to stop and think about the reasons that lead you to it. I too, never once took the time to analyse what I was really doing. Looking in as...
    mmnnc mmnnc 18-21, F 5 Responses Oct 27, 2012

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    Relapse

    I have been batteling bulimia, accompinied by, depression, anxiety, and ocd for over 8 years now. There was a time 1 1/2 years ago when i was in my recovery, i was 3 mths without a binge, and then it happened, relapse.  I had been in therapy for over 7 years been...
    runner25 runner25 26-30 Mar 30, 2009

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    I Never Thought It Would Happen To Me

    This is an incomplete story. I am looking for it's ending, and I am hopeful. One day I want to live free from eating disorders. My story starts two years ago, with some events that dented my self-esteem and confidence. At the time, I used food to cope, and used it to stuff my...
    RemarkablySparkly RemarkablySparkly 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 15, 2012

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    Every time I purge, I tell myself it's going to

    be last time. The last time I do things that make me want to purge and the last time I actually purge. And I feel good about it for like a week. Then I get out of control again and the cycle repeats. I'm so sick of feeling out of control and like a failure. I'm so sick of...
    Sa5mRachel Sa5mRachel 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 29, 2014

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    After working in a nursing home

    and seeing how much taking care of your body plays a part in your life later, I'm afraid of the damage I have already done. My teeth are rotting and hurt and I can't hold anything in anymore. Can't enjoy family get togethers or simple things. I can't take what this is doing to...
    jussme91 jussme91 22-25, F 1 Response Dec 13, 2014

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    I Hate This ****.

    I've been bulimic for like 3 years now. I'll stop at months at a time but it always comes back and i'll do it every single day. I'm soo ******* sick of this ****. I can't control it. And it sucks because I can't party with my friends because thats when I have no control at all...
    makethisstop makethisstop 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 26, 2008

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    I am tired of letting my body define me.

    .. It has taken control over my life and my identity. I want to stop upward or downward comparing my body to models and friends. What started out just being ice cream... Turned into on going purging. I am ashamed of what I do and how long it has taken over. No one knows. I hide...
    HalfPerfect HalfPerfect 22-25, F 4 Responses Jan 8

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    Talk To Me

    I have bulimia and I desperately want to recover, someone message me and offer me some support please?:( and if you are also suffering from this disorder i would be happy to talk to you and try to support you, we can do it together, someone please message me x
    recoverymia recoverymia 16-17, F 6 Responses Feb 22, 2013

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    I'm ready to move on from this disease.

    It controls my life and I hate living a secret. I can't tell anyone, but I am looking for support and someone who can recover together.
    misternomad misternomad 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 3

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    I do not want to feel like this anymore.

    I want to recover. I lay in bed every night and think about how I've failed again at beating this. I feel ashamed to talk to anyone about it. I can't see why anyone will ever love me if they knew. I'm exhausted all the time. My mind is a mess. My chest hurts. Hair is thinning...
    AspireToBeFree AspireToBeFree 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 24

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    I am 36 years old and have been battling this

    horrible disease for 20 years. I need NEED to recover, it's so damn hard. This is the worst feeling ever. I want to fully enjoy my life and my awesome family (I have a loving husband and an active six year old son). I've been pretty health issue free over the years, which made...
    wendisaw wendisaw 36-40, F Jan 11, 2014

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    I have had bulimia for about a year now

    and it is honestly ruining my life. I have always been an anxious person and felt a little bit insecure- when I was younger I had these rituals that I completed to make myself feel safe. But then this anxiety/ need to control came to be all about food. I also have a history...
    lolinghappily03 lolinghappily03 22-25, F Jan 27, 2014

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    Nobody is perfect and nothing is absolute.

    Every moment we have to make different decisions and only in that moment will these decisions be relevant. I can write down all the information that I can gather about eating healthily etc but I cannot predict and future and must be MORE adaptable and not use my mistakes as an...
    lolinghappily03 lolinghappily03 22-25, F Feb 1, 2014

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    Where Do I Start?

    What started as a way of relieving over-eating becomes a routine to relief stress and anger. There's no doubt there's a body-image reasoning behind my bulimia, but I've used it now as a weapon to make myself feel better, that I'm at least in control of something. I'm a student in...
    huntingjanuary huntingjanuary 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 11, 2010

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    Hello, im the new kid!

    will introduce my self viral! have been stuggling with that issue almost 9 years! Never realized the time! Been to doctors but never achieved to finish my programm. When smt is going wrong its my secret friend im counting down 365 days and this is officialy the say ONE.Stay close...
    lilcici90 lilcici90 22-25, F Aug 8, 2014

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    Diary of An Anorexic/bulimic

    One day when I returned from highschool I found my grandmother in the living room; she was over my place and planning to stay for a few days. The first thing she noticed was that I gained weight since she had last seen me. And the very first comment that she made...
    Tonija Tonija 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 21, 2009

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    Give Me Some Energy

    Last night, i decided to do some research and try to find people i can interact with who have bulimia. this website has been something i have been looking for, and hopefully something to help me recover. so, now to my story. I am 18 years old a freshman in college, and once again...
    lwstiar lwstiar 18-21 2 Responses Apr 11, 2011

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    Slowly Losing All Control

    I want and need to recover from Bulimia Nervosa. I know I can, but once I slip up I let myself go. I have been this way struggling with this horrible disorder since the end of my freshman year in Highschool. I have this need for the perfect body, and I strive for what is...
    mwao1921 mwao1921 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 12, 2009

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    Good Day

    Well today was a milestone for me. I went to a wedding where it was pot luck so tons of food, loads of trigger foods etc. I didn't binge and purge. This is the first time in 41 years that I have been in such a situation and not done that. I am quite proud but I have so say I...
    tornado6 tornado6 51-55, F 1 Response Aug 11, 2012

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    For my personal experience (Now,

    recover from bulimia for > a year), before getting rid of the root of this bulimia problem , I had been focusing only my weight or my weight-line ,my leg ,my thigh so on... I had been watching my calories intake everyday and maybe every meals for almost 10 years. It is...
    belleeec belleeec 26-30, F Jun 25, 2014

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    There is nothing more in this world

    that I wish for, than to recover from Bulimia. Its something that I struggle day to day. Its a secret that I have to deal with. Its a shame I must carry with me day to day. Its something that makes me feel vulnerable and naked in front of everyone. I'd give anything to say...
    AlyAngel AlyAngel 26-30, F 1 Response Dec 5, 2013

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    Recovery And Meditation

    For the past week, I've felt a little different. I am still bingeing and purging, but it's gone from twice a day to once a day. To many this may sound like not a very big deal, however, I am ecstatic! I feel this shift in my habits and life... slowly gaining respect, love and...
    cicigirl cicigirl 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 29, 2011

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    I haven't purged in two months

    and I was starting to get healthy and my body was almost back to it's normal form until last night😔 I ate more than 1200 calories and I felt disgusting so I purged. Every time I stop I always relapse. I know it's not healthy but with Mia I feel like I can eat, otherwise I don...
    MeaninglessMemories MeaninglessMemories 13-15, F 2 Responses Jun 25, 2014

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    j3nnalov3m3 j3nnalov3m3 26-30, F 1 Response Feb 22

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    All I Ever Wanted Was Everything

    I am 22 years old struggling with bulimia. I have been attending counseling and trying very hard. I have my good days and my bad days. My boyfriend has been very supportive throughout this process. I just really need to speak to people who are actually going through this too.
    slc90 slc90 22-25, F Dec 7, 2012

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    What I Love Most Wnats Me Gone.

    Hi my name is Kimberly and I am bulimic. That’s a pretty solid definition. I mean I can be defined by more than this such as; white, female, ginger, 19 and a half years old. I like to play Mario kart and hula hoop also. For me though-at this point in my life- my major...
    ktrueds ktrueds 18-21 1 Response Sep 21, 2013

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