I Want To Say This To Fairy Chocolate

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3 People

    Now I Know How A Shameless No-conscience Hypocrite Looks Like

    Dear Fairy, These few days have been a bit crazy.. that image kinda pops up.. nonetheless i do have enough to occupy my time and it's nice to be treated nicely by some too....puedo bailar y cantar, entonces so it really makes life easier that way. But I just want to say, now...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Dec 15, 2012

    Always Want This Should Be Last

    Hi Fairy Chocolate, You don't exist. But to write is better than not to, sometimes. It really has been a while, to vent. Not that i didn't want to, or need to, but struggling to press down emotions. Just let tears flow down alone without having the urge to write. It's not...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Sep 3, 2013

    Hey Fairy, I thought it was over.

    . like i could do without talking to you.. today.. my bad.. or not.. i thought i have strength to look at my old pics... the pics without him but took by him.. at first i was fine.. i looked so great before.. and then gradually.. i realize.. like one pic.. and more.. i was so...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Mar 24, 2015

    3 Wishes (either One Of Them Granted Will Work For Me)

    Dear Fairy, First wish, you or alien or future people alter the history so I NEVER MET SUCH JERK. If not, the second wish is FORGET EVERYTHING about that jerk.... EVERYTHING. No memories. ZERO. NO REGRET. NOTING LEFT. Please. Final wish or at least make it real if the...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Dec 16, 2012

    Being Called "this word"

    Being called "this word" - Drama That never occurred to me and if you know me, that's the last word for me. I wish, I wish everything was a drama than my life could have been so much better, easier. Today I found out. To be honest now im very shocked, angry and want to cry again...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jul 23, 2013

    Bike "hit And Run"

    Dear Fairy, Today a bike "hit and run" and now I get bruises.. angry... upset.. and hurt! And is life just full of crappy things? Rains fall on the good and bad people? Then why be good? Why? Is that a must to get a broken heart or get broken-hearted in a life time in order...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Nov 21, 2012

    Who Cares.

    Yes, who cares.. at least it's not you. As expected you can block, not read.. and delete your account. Whatever. I lost my accounts too. Not worth it since i lost other stuff.. anyways.. what do i know? for days and years all i was in a confused depressed mode. Not that im...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    May 2, 2013

    cute guys,, cute guys,

    , and cute guys!! blue eyes :D
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Nov 3, 2015
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    1 Response Jan 27, 2014

    Poto Vs Lnd

    Dear Fairy, If one does not have delicate feelings, or believe in LND, what's the point? I don't want to remember this day or that day. I spent it wisely and must forget. If emotions no longer exist are we even humans? I don't like Nessun dorma... selfish characters. POTO and LND...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 8, 2013

    I have a lot to say..

    it's cold. My hands are very frozen.. yet I will keep on typing. I type not because for sharing. But I need to vent. Or one day I may read what I am writing down for now. It feels sometimes .......nice to read about my own feelings and I can understand myself more than anything...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 13, 2015

    Fairy, Listen.

    Fairy, But there is one thing I should also be proud of. I know I also made a right decision. I didn't fight........ coz long time ago even with that monster.. i know he is not honest.. about his office.. his past.. etc.. and his lack of motions with his ex-es. It was my...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Sep 8, 2013

    Disappear

    Dear Fairy, Can you really exist and please replace me with something else and all I want is to disappear and never existed......hurt no one and if someone really cares then let's there be no memory of me ever happen. I don't want to keep going on crying like this, or to force...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Nov 26, 2012

    A Fake Is A Fake.

    Extremely ridiculous to write anything here.. but even more so.. ludicrous to have believed ......... a fake is a fake.
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Sep 8, 2013

    To Write Or Not To Write.

    To write or not to write. Better yet to say, to cry or not to cry. Write, I can choose, most of the time, not to. But it doesn't help to stop the head from thinking, despite active dissociation. But crying, I am afraid there is no efficient way to hold back. You can try to hold...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    May 1, 2013

    Keep This Here

    Extremely ridiculous to write anything here.. but even more so.. ludicrous to have believed ......... a fake is a fake. Sometimes I am still angry, sometimes I am just in tears. Biggest mistake is having believed in someone so fake, so heartless, so manipulative. There are...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Sep 8, 2013

    So Many Perverts

    Dear Mr Chocolate, Today I wanna talk to you. Where are u when I get bullied? Where are you when perverts trying.... I may as well cut my hair short and be a tom boy than to wait for you to protect me? It makes me cry because you never keep your promises. And you are no...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 11, 2013

    To Those Who Hurt Her

    First of all, thank you for making her miserable. If that was your goal, congratulations, you have succeeded. But what are you intentions? Do you think you are worthy to be a friend? Or have you mistaken what is the definition of a friend. She never hurt you. Why you keep...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jul 23, 2013

    Mi Voz's Back! :d

    Dear Fairy, I just wanna say after losing my voz for some many days and today i can start to sing a bit again... i miss so much my voice in the bathroom, hahaha.. bath and singing.. hehe.. te extrano and te quiero mi voz! It's nice to be able to smile. Be a happy fabulous self...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Dec 8, 2012

    Big Black Bag

    Dear Fairy, Last night I kinda again dreamt about him.. related.. not recalled if he was in.. probably not... but something like he left a big black bag.. if psychoanalysis stuff works.. i guess this big black bag=baggage.. and in the dream some voice told me not keep that bag...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Dec 5, 2012

    I trusted him; he hurt me; he feels no guilt

    ever; i am left broken and in tears.. nembutal.
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    1 Response May 10, 2014

    Crying Eyes

    It just hurts tremendously that while you cry.. the other jerk has already looking into another person's eyes and professing his love for her. I don't want to think... It really really hurts.. anyone to shed some light? Any way to remove things completely? Why is there no such...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Sep 10, 2013

    Con Te Partirò

    Dear Fairy Chocolat, Con Te Partirò. Por Favor. Y Necessito.
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 7, 2013

    From My Blog

    from my blog, Tonight I am sinking again. But I almost haven't shed a tear. But my heart is crying. Do you know how it feels to have a heart crying? I finally find words to describe this feeling. It's nothing pleasant. I don't want to let myself cry and die. The moments when...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 28, 2013

    1

    Fairy Chocolate, you should be without gender.. that feels more right. I still cannot forget and every now and then I miss the jerk very much. It really hurts because I have been trying my best to "picture" everything about him is bad. How much I used to like his name. A common...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Nov 1, 2012

    Christmas Gift Or Take Away I Beg Desperately

    Dear Fairy, Or Dear Santa, Please, I beg of you, to rid me of this painful emotion. I am very afraid and scared that sometimes I really have no hope to live and I wonder when I will die, when I am desperate enough and with the gut to take my own life. I am very sad. I dont...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Dec 24, 2012

    2015, tonight really cry.

    . i think more or less i have succeeded lately to resist the urge to get dragged into the spiral of despair and tears. I don't know if really because of hormones fluctuation or some convo with some strangers lately that led to the outburst of emotions. It's not so sudden after...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 12, 2015

    Let Me Forget And Also May Curse Come True On Such Bstrd

    Dear Fairy, Let me forget and also may curse come true on such bstrd! May all those reckless selfish people who crash our life and treat like it has nothing to do with them.. end up miserable.. it's really time to have laws to protect people from being toyed with or being dumped...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 7, 2013

    Emotional Cliff

    What is the definition of a hypocritical jerk aka pure asxhole? A pretentious man who tried to convince everyone including himself that he was all nice and gentleman-like, lured you to fall for him, with all his sweet acts and words, then suddenly, push you over the emotional...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Nov 13, 2012

    I Re-read Old Stuff

    Dear Fairy, Today can you have a gender and be my brother listening to me. May be it's my boredom or my curiosity or my hormones that I re-read those years-old messages. I still cry. And thus red swollen eyes now. I thought I am doing well these few days at least. I know...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Nov 20, 2012

    Delete

    Better in a way now.. i almost forget how wonderful I am and how I enjoy life.. my lively self............ I hope this will be the almost last article here. I started writing here since that very sad and depressing cloud hanging over me, for some years now. Whoever is reading...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Nov 19, 2013

    I cry painfully today.

    . so much hurt still not going away.. and why always get bullied.. again and again.. i don't want to talk anymore.. no use.. it just gets more hurt and more disappointment and frustration. And trying to hold in tears on the outside doesn't mean it stops bleeding and weeping...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Apr 26, 2014

    A Good Man Will Never Hurt You Or Let You Cry

    Dear Fairy, Thank for your Mr tortoise..... the trip was nice.. now the key is even locked in..... hopefully it will settle and never surface again. I know.. i am not stupid now.. just hurt.. and cry But now I can see a good man will never let you cry.. and hurt.. and...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    1 Response Dec 19, 2012

    Quote : http://www.mindbodygreen.

    com/0-22301/5-things-psychopaths-say-to-make-you-feel-crazy.html?utm_source=diyncrafts.com&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=pubexchange_module WOW.............I wish I read this earlier! OMG!!! At least I am at safer place now.. hahahahaha.. wow wow wow
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 29, 2016

    Love Is

    Love is not just about feelings, but it fills your heart with warm feeling. Love is not love if it cannot last, it never wanes, it never goes away. Love is beautiful; not hurtful. Love exists; but not necessary means you can witness it. Love makes you smile; not tears and sobs...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Nov 4, 2012

    Snow Wolf Lake.......

    ........sad and touching.. my story is so much worse and in tears.. and two little strong.......yuck... musketeer where. make up. purple dress. tears.
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    May 10, 2014

    I miss him.. i know it doesn't make sense

    and it sholdn't be.. may be because of HK.. the hotel,, the tram.. the memories. I don't want to say anymore.. too many things running on my mind and i don't like that. the world is not fair.. it really hurts so much that the scar is not going away and it breaks open sometimes...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    1 Response May 2, 2014

    If I Can Lose My Emotion, Give Up My Heart And Passion, Even For A Week, A Month, A Year

    Dear Fairy, I just cried very much just now and it could have been better if i just went out and had a drink.. but my voz is suffering so I didn't go.. plus I don't have the energy to go with people who do not respect or care about your friendship, etc. Is it not possible to...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Dec 15, 2012

    Thank You Santa Or Miracle-maker

    Thank you Santa or Miracle-maker, Suddenly I am okay.. may be you exist and listen to me ...... it feels extremely great to not care now.. suddenly.. but please let me relapse... you know sometimes despise all these senses.. only being emtional at one point,, it overthrows...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    1 Response Dec 27, 2012

    I Dont' Know When.. But Soon

    Dear Whatever, Nevermind you are not real. This is total bullshit and pathetic to be here. But I just want to say there are times that I just want to disappear. To bad in order to exist I must die first. And I am gutless to still sorting out the easy and hopefully painless way...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 27, 2013

    haven't cry so much for a few months

    but i lost it yesterday.. and i screamed.. and cry in bed.. and can' sleep.. head hurts.. and i still have to urge to cry but i don't know what do it justice anymore. tired. why cry so much. why. i just have to cry.. sigh.
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Oct 30, 2014

    Walking Those Streets And Places

    Dear Fairy, It's another year and I don't get any happier. A new year doesn't mean anything unless you try to make it. After all, it's nothing new but the earth is back on the same spot and starts rotating around the sun again. There is nothing to be that hopeful or worry, we...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Jan 2, 2013

    Q&a

    Dear Fairy, Why does my heart still ache? How to completely forget? Is it better to have never met? How to stop crying over and over again? - Too bad you have loved, the emotional part; and physically associated with hormones. So hormone therapy may help, or just try to turn into...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Nov 11, 2012

    Now I Know How A Shameless No-conscience Hypocrite Looks Like

    Dear Fairy, These few days have been a bit crazy.. that image kinda pops up.. nonetheless i do have enough to occupy my time and it's nice to be treated nicely by some too....puedo bailar y cantar, entonces so it really makes life easier that way. But I just want to say, now...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Dec 15, 2012

    Tonight chatting with someone

    and she still mentioned her ex....... it makes me wonder...... It sure feels a lot easier to listen to another person's story, but not when you are being the one in the story. It almost sounds nonsensical. She still misses hers. And I know I do miss mine. Despite it really is...
    ludai ludai
    22-25
    Mar 4, 2015
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