I Want to Take Ninja Lessons From Chuck Norris

for all who are ninjas, who want to be ninjas, or just like chuck norris. 106 People

    When Steven Seagal kills a ninja,

    he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Dec 8, 2014

    Chuck Norris invented the nunchuks

    but came to realize that he doesn't need weapons. They were originally called Non-Chucks after Chuck discarded it.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Sep 2, 2014

    Ninjas cannot catch you

    if you are Chuck Norris. This is of course impossible. Chuck would never allow someone like him to co-exist alongside him.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Aug 5, 2015
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Sep 4, 2014

    When Chuck wears all his black belts,

    the ninjas took him for one of their own.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Oct 31, 2014

    I'm good and sneaking around quietly already,

    but I would appreciate if Chuck Norris taught me more.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Aug 29, 2014

    The Chuck Norris version of a chocolate

    milkshake is a raw porterhouse doused in diesel fuel, 2 human souls, 5 1/2 tbsp of giraffe blood and 1 egg
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Aug 28, 2014

    Ninjas can punch thru solid steel,

    but Chuck Norris can punch thru solid diamond.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Aug 3, 2015

    I m sure Chuck Norris has his own EP account .

    I m not sure though , what his profile photo and nickname would be like
    prince35xxx prince35xxx
    36-40, M
    Jul 24, 2014

    Elvis Presley, Richard Petty,

    Budweiser, and Michael Jackson all call Chuck Norris "The King".
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jul 17, 2014

    I use to watch walker Texas ranger

    when I was real young. What a great show that was. I always loved when walker kicked the bad guys ***. Now I'm wondering how can you a hold of this guy lol
    YourSecretAdmire22 YourSecretAdmire22
    22-25, M
    2 Responses Jul 24, 2014

    Ninja Turtles hide in the sewer

    because they know Chuck Norris rules the land.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Sep 27, 2014

    Someday

    I will be a ninja. It's only a matter of time, it's not a question of 'if'. The only if's involved are whether my parents can be persuaded to pay for them, or if I will have to wait till I am on my own and have a job. It will be glorious, too. I will finally live my dream...
    Irishchick Irishchick
    16-17, F
    7 Responses Jul 25, 2007
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jan 30, 2015
    waterbaby waterbaby
    26-30, F
    Jan 22, 2009

    "Brokeback Mountain" is not just a movie.

    It's also what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Dec 21, 2014

    They were going to put Chuck Norris in Pokemon,

    but he always wins. If he lost, the save file would get corrupted for unexplained reasons.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    2 Responses Jul 24, 2014

    There's only one thing greater

    than a high priest vatican assasin warlock and that's Chuck Norris!
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Sep 28, 2014

    Chuck Norris was dropped twice

    as a baby. First on Hiroshima, then on Nagasaki.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Sep 20, 2014

    Chuck Norris never needs to pay

    for something, things appear from nothing for him.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Aug 3, 2014

    Chuck Norris doesn't throw ninja stars.

    He throws terrified Ninjas who throw ninja stars for him.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Mar 25, 2015

    Chuck Norris is so tough he doesn't eat ice

    cream, he makes ice scream.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Aug 31, 2014

    When Chuck Norris throws a boomerang,

    it comes back with a beer.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jul 23, 2014

    When Chuck Norris lets the cat out of the bag,

    it's a mutated, ninja-cat that has a thirst for innocent blood.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Mar 23, 2015

    In Pokemon FireRed and LeafGreen,

    you can only catch 386 Pokemon. In the same game, Chuck Norris can catch all 719 Pokemon. With a Pokeball.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    2 Responses Jul 24, 2014

    Santa can see you when you're sleeping.

    ..Chuck Norris can see and hear you every second, minute and hour each day.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Jul 18, 2014

    The only difference between nunchucks

    and the legs of Chuck Norris is that wood eventually breaks.
    jml2000 jml2000
    61-65, M
    1 Response Oct 9, 2014
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