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I Want You to Explain How Santa Gets Down the Chimney

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 62 People

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    Come on EP getrid of the winter and Christmas stuff PEASE
    mad316 mad316 36-40, M 2 Responses Jun 7, 2012

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    I Dont Understand ....

    All mine are blocked in ... How does he get in ...??????
    expressomarkie expressomarkie 46-50, M Dec 3, 2013

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    Actually

    Santa is a space alien who has access to a teleporter like Capt Picard used in star trek.  His is a portable one that fits on his sleigh.  I think its Rudolph who mans the controls and sends Santa into the house.  He doesn't actuall come down the chimney, he just...
    levin60kitty levin60kitty 61-65 2 Responses Dec 2, 2008

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    Oh, Let Me...

    He doesn't use the chimney. He gets his big fat *** in through the door at three in the morning after being out at the liquor store all night, throws the presents at the tree, then goes and has sex with mommy and goes to bed.
    drcynic drcynic 26-30, M 11 Responses Feb 9, 2009

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    Santa

    Santa,I want to know,How he gets down the chimney,What happens,When there's no chimney,Even better still,What he does,When the chimney's collapsed!
    lazycrazybasket lazycrazybasket 46-50, M 1 Response Nov 6, 2011

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    A Myth!

    Santa doesn't use the Chimney!!! Some houses don't even have chimneys.... So, it's only plausible that Santa teleports into people's home. That's right! He has technology beyond our own! Whoo! XD Where do you think the idea teleportation came from, with Sci-fi...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Dec 1, 2008

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    Tell That to a Child!

    If you were working as a Santa in a store and a child ask you the big question, how would you respond?  I think I might say magic dust..I like things that sparkle!
    wiseowl wiseowl 61-65, F 5 Responses Nov 29, 2008

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    Oh! Er, Um.

    Eeeh.. I can explain! I can explain! Um, hehehe hee ^^', so, well.. sweetie, er, you see... uh... but OH! What do we have here? Pre-Christmas present? I wonder what's in it! I'll put it here on the sofa. *places* *runs*
    Bob57 Bob57 18-21, M Dec 1, 2008

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    On A Beam

    He uses star trek technology and is beamed down by Scottie.
    Rapolis Rapolis 66-70, M 2 Responses Dec 17, 2011

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    That's Easy It Is Magic

    That's easy it's magic. when i was a kid growing up we had only a mantle piece no chimney, yet Santa came down the Chimney every year like magic. In my Imagination I could always see him sliding down the chimney that would magically appear just for him so he could deliver the...
    missytiger missytiger 61-65, T Feb 27, 2012

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    Santa Had An Incident

    Sometimes in the dead of winter, people ponder: Is there a 'Santa'? Where does he really live? How come the the Elves have not unionized? My grandpa told me a tale once. Many questions. None of them matter now... It was sometime in 1974, middle America. Santa had been hauling...
    EricS EricS 31-35, M 14 Responses Nov 30, 2008

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    It's All Theory!

     Santa is probably some type of being that exists displaced from time space. Since he isn't bound to our rules of linear movement through time he can simply just "be" in side of your home when he is making his deliveries. This would explain 1)Why he is old. 2...
    KIFACTOR KIFACTOR 18-21, M Dec 1, 2008

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    Magic

    Santa uses magic dust to get down Chimneys and Santa is magic :) I am a child at heart and love all the anticipation :)
    jellybean113 jellybean113 41-45, F Dec 3, 2013

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    I Don't Have a Chimney!!!!!!!!!!

    How am I going to get my presents now?!
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Nov 30, 2008

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    Pure Magic...

    The magic of believing, is the magic of doing.  I never believed in Santa, but that one is easy.  Magic is the answer!  LOL.
    skinnybitch skinnybitch 26-30, F Feb 9, 2009

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    More Liquid Than Solid

    Given that when he laughs, Santa's belly wiggles like a bowl full of jelly, we can deduce that Santa is comprised of a gelatin-like matrix, and is actually more of a liquid than a solid with high surface tension. This enables Santa to flow down the chimney and re-establish his...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jul 12, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    What the hell why not. Gimme what you got :p
    EmeraldBrony EmeraldBrony 18-21, M 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    ok, for awhile I had it in my head that maybe it was a crazy coincidence that you kept joining the gyms I went to, but now I'm crazy convinced that you are straight up copying me...
    jbm1984 jbm1984 31-35, F 1 Response 8 hrs ago

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    I'm up for your questions right now
    Zampax Zampax 18-21, M 10 hrs ago

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    So, I am new here and would want you guys to ask me any question that comes to your mind. Since I do believe random question is the best way to know someone.
    thelastgoodbye thelastgoodbye 18-21, F 4 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Please let me help you take off your big bra?
    thebustierthebetter thebustierthebetter 46-50, M 13 hrs ago

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    I don't, I don't c the point, if u can't ask the question in a comment, then you probably don't need to be asking it to begin with...
    morganza504 morganza504 36-40 15 hrs ago

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    I just want some girl on girl action I'm not bi I just want to experiment so bad!
    Jamievela Jamievela 16-17, F 15 hrs ago

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    update I'm not here for sex or talking about anything relating to sexual explicit subjects so please stop messaging this filth to me about how horny you are or what you like to...
    masterLLL masterLLL 56-60, M 3 days ago

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    I lack so much self confidence right now, and it's becoming more of a problem than I ever imagined. Anxiety keeps me up at night and stops me from doing almost anything in life...
    HollyMaria954 HollyMaria954 18-21, F 3 days ago

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    I want to reach the highest mountain of love, stand on the top and look down.
    Babeondwy Babeondwy 41-45, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Pin me down teach me not to talk back. Show me what's yours and no one can touch. Whisper sweet nothings but also yell at me when I argue don't ignore me show me not to ever do...
    gummybear2090 gummybear2090 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    I know a lot of people, especially folks who are new to EP, like to ask questions and get to know you through chat, rather than taking the time to read profiles. And I also know...
    mickitg mickitg 41-45, T 6 days ago

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    Well, there are not many things that you should know before adding me to your circle, but I do want you to know the following: I don't add people to my circle before talking to...
    Drastine Drastine 18-21, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    Sephora has been so helpful to me with how to apply my makeup. Each and every one of the the ladies there has been so nice and helpful to me over the last several years showing me...
    Rosabella3 Rosabella3 56-60, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    You can't say you know it's your fault and turn it around on me as if it's my fault. How can you own your mistakes if you constantly accuse me of making you do them. What...
    Nomoreshattereddreams Nomoreshattereddreams 36-40, F Aug 21

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    I am getting to the point where I am starting to feel "iffish" about having people add me to their circle. Of course I avoid adding people to mine for that very reason, as well as...
    Jugemu Jugemu 31-35, M Aug 20

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    do understand i can careless about your sexual orientation I'm straight so before adding me know this i don't talk about sexually explicit subjects i don't care for it so we have...
    masterLLL masterLLL 56-60, M 1 Response Aug 20

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    I would love to be inside a warm womb, cared for and loved on for months until the time comes, and you feel like I'm coming. You'll spread your legs and start to push, enduring all...
    BigBellyMama BigBellyMama 18-21, F Aug 19

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    I am not arguing... I'm just explaining why I'm right...
    throwawaychild throwawaychild 51-55, M 3 Responses Aug 18

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    I see a lot of posts on EP that girls are heartbroken which is surprising to me as I thought guys would never leave a girl. I am not here to advice anyone but I want to share some...
    anotherguyonearth anotherguyonearth 26-30, M Aug 18

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    Before Contacting Me. I'm completely open-minded and generally willing to talk about anything. However,1. I am who I am, flaws and all, I like who I am, and will not apologise for...
    AAJames AAJames 26-30, M 1 Response Aug 18

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    Since I was 9 years old I wanted to be pregnant always, every single year like my grandmother and his 13 children. I'm pregnant now!! I can't wait to have a huge belly and feel...
    BellyYorke BellyYorke 31-35, F 3 Responses Aug 17

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    People quit judging....stop putting people down cause they are different..a person is a person no matter what they look like or what they have done or has happened to them..so stop...
    TheLeesIsHere TheLeesIsHere 22-25, F Aug 17

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    I want you.............……
    cmyk323 cmyk323 36-40, F 9 Responses Aug 15

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    I want you to ask me anything about myself an I'll answer.
    loveyourself98 loveyourself98 16-17, T Aug 15

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    Love is a mutual commitment to someone and both people are willing to accept each other for who they are completely and no matter how hard things get, they always try their best to...
    porcelainymphet porcelainymphet 18-21, F Aug 14

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