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I Want Your Best Pick Up Line

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 88 People

    Re: Pick Up Line

    "Hey baby. You are so fine. Wanna  a date?" "Damn. Momma. You are hot." "You are smoking hot." "You have some knockers." "Damn. You have a great ***." "I can make you world. Come to my house."    ...
    mother1983 mother1983 31-35, F 2 Responses May 10, 2008

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    Nice Shirt

     "Wow, that shirt is really becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too" lmao
    Manders Manders 18-21, F 3 Responses May 9, 2008

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    'Bubba & Cooter's Book of Sure-fire Pick-up Lines'

    1) Did you fart? cuz you blew me away. 2) Are yer parents retarded? cuz ya sure are special. 3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea I can't hold it in. 4) Do you have a library card? cuz I'd like to check you out 5) Is there a mirror in yer pants? cuz I can see...
    LostInTyme LostInTyme 61-65, M May 20, 2009

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    Or Maybe Not....

    "Excuse me miss, but does this cloth smell like chloroform?"   Just kidding!  It was in the comics today - Argyle Sweater by Scot Hilburn
    EBunbury EBunbury 46-50, M 2 Responses Mar 15, 2009

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    Fat Girl

    you dont sweat much for a fat girl
    cyrilpeter cyrilpeter 51-55, M 1 Response Dec 7, 2010

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    Works Best While Intoxicated...

    "Those jeans look amazing on you... ... but they'd look even better on my bedroom floor." [[raises eyebrow]] Any takers?  
    OFFthecuff OFFthecuff 22-25, F 5 Responses Sep 1, 2008

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    Random guy: You are worth more then a dam pile

    of schist wise girl Me: marry me
    sixpackbookworm sixpackbookworm 13-15, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Family

    how would you like to be buried with my people
    cyrilpeter cyrilpeter 51-55, M 3 Responses Dec 7, 2010

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    I Don't Have Any

    But i've heard a few cheesey ones! One guy actually said "Get your coat love, you've pulled!" Sheesh! I politly told him that he hadn't
    deleted deleted 26-30 May 9, 2008

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    Amazingly Bad

    Can I hang out with you until it's safe back where I farted? I'm not telling you this to impress you...but I am Batman Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a footlong.
    Sweetroll88 Sweetroll88 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 30, 2010

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    Im Sorry

    Hi. Im.... Im sorry... Im at a loss here, you're so beautiful I forgot my name...
    hotroddot39 hotroddot39 41-45, M Mar 2, 2011

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    Here Is An Irish One...

    my sister says this was said to her as a marriage proposal  "How would you like to be buried with my people"
    maninamousesuit maninamousesuit 51-55, M 2 Responses May 10, 2008

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    Freeze

    Freeze   you  are  under  arrest   you  have  the  right  to  remain  sexy EVerything  you   say  can  and   will   be  held  against you. I  have ...
    rockybear397 rockybear397 47, F 12 Responses May 9, 2008

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    Ummm...

    I don't have one...I usually just flirt! But I have heard a few really tired lines and I want to know which one's work for you guys!
    vinividivici21 vinividivici21 22-25, F May 9, 2008

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    Here's one from WKRP!

    "Hi. I'm extremely wealthy."
    notdarcy notdarcy 41-45, M 6 Responses Oct 10, 2008

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    Wanted

    Attention: tall rich guy wanted.......please be an idiot who needs someone to write checks for you!!
    deleted deleted 26-30 Mar 3, 2013

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    Here's My Number

    "Here's my number...call me if you're brave enough".....It worked!
    peanutbrittle peanutbrittle 46-50, F 1 Response May 11, 2008

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    Old One

    Hi. How long have you had your pilots license for? Why? Because i figure you must have flown down from heaven because I don't see any signs of bruising.
    0hBrandie 0hBrandie 41-45, M 2 Responses May 10, 2008

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    I Want to

    I want to **** you.Do you want to **** me? I've only used a pick up line once,we have been dating for two years so I guess it was worth it.
    Trikka Trikka 18-21, F 3 Responses Jul 25, 2008

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    Dancing

    are you dancing or holding down a floor board
    cyrilpeter cyrilpeter 51-55, M 2 Responses Dec 7, 2010

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    You Don't Want to Get Electrocuted Do You?

    I could protect men during a rain storm with lightening by hiding their "rod" for them so they wouldn't get electrocuted. Of course I don't think I need to explain any further......
    cinfullynn cinfullynn 46-50, F 7 Responses May 9, 2008

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    Any Irish In You

    have you any irish in you, do you want some.
    cyrilpeter cyrilpeter 51-55, M 2 Responses Dec 10, 2010

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    Hay

    "want to get a pizza and ****" after she slaps you "ok we'll get subs"
    loneranger loneranger 31-35, M Apr 13, 2009

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    Here You Go

    you walk over to her and ask "Hay you want to get a pizza and ****" and after she slaps you,  you say "ok we'll get subs instead"  
    loneranger loneranger 31-35, M May 10, 2008

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    Body

    If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me? Lyrics in a Country song.. but dang good line !!!
    deleted deleted 26-30 Mar 3, 2013

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    Damn Girl!

    If I told you, you had the sexiest body i'd ever seen... Would you hold it against me???!   Orrr my personal favorite..   Mmmm girl... Are you Retarded??... Cause I think you are Sooo Special!   ...   ;P      
    Vox Vox 31-35, F 5 Responses May 10, 2008

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    Another Groaner

    Man- "Was your father a thief?" Woman- "No, why?" Man- "Because he stole the stars and put them in your eyes."
    Bluegrass Bluegrass 46-50, F 13 Responses May 10, 2008

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    Game, Set, & Match.

    If I were to ask you for sex, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?
    deleted deleted 26-30 9 Responses Aug 31, 2008

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    These Will Work Every Time. Not Really.

    Hey baby, I noticed you had a bra on. I'd like to stick my face in that. Hey there, if you can speak Parseltongue you can get in my chamber of secrets. Have you seen Aladdin? I sure do like sex. Please have sex with me. Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I...
    InfamousKilljoyLorelei InfamousKilljoyLorelei 16-17, F Jul 3, 2013

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    Good One

    hey there I like those pants. But, they wouldl look better hangin on my bedpost.
    Tx1978 Tx1978 36-40, M Nov 6, 2013

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    The First Time I Saw You

    From the first time I saw you I knew I was going to have real and/or imaginary sex with you.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Mar 4, 2013

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    Best I Ever Heard

    A man catches up with a girl walking home in the rain, and says to her, "Tickle your *** with a feather", she says"What did you say". He says I said Particularly nasty weather.
    cyrilpeter cyrilpeter 51-55, M Oct 11, 2012

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    Hmmmm

    i don't really have any pickup lines but i was thinking i might try this. i go up to a lady in a bar and say "hi my name is Rick i have an incredibly small penis...can i buy you a drink?"
    ihaveanameitsrick ihaveanameitsrick 46-50, M 20 Responses May 9, 2008

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    Here It Comes

    If I were to ask you for sex, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?
    chaosXIII chaosXIII 22-25, M 2 Responses May 19, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    My pickup lines Are "hey you know what time it is?" Or "I like your shape up" I s.uck at trying to talk to guys. When I see guys, I hope they talk to me. Sometimes I make eye...
    lorrena19 lorrena19 18-21, F Nov 21

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    I want a best friend that's a girl who is willing to call me on holidays and who's willing to talk to me everyday and every night
    foranhighschool1028 foranhighschool1028 22-25, M 3 Responses Nov 18

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    I haven't had any really close friends since before I moved in elementary school for the last time. I have a boyfriend and he's amazing, he's the only one who I truly trust and...
    TurtlesAndLlamas TurtlesAndLlamas 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 5

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    Hello! I want a BEST FRIEND!!
    RockHock RockHock 26-30, M Dec 9

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    How do you keep the music playing? How do you make it last? How do you keep the song from fading too fast? How do you lose yourself to someone and never lose your way? How do you...
    stiltcourt stiltcourt 41-45, F 2 Responses Nov 25

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    "People are always telling you that change is a good thing, but what they're really saying is that something that you didn't want to happen just happened." -- You've Got Mail.
    restored87 restored87 46-50, F 6 Responses Nov 28

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    Jealousy is like an ugly Christmas sweater! You can't get rid of it so you hide it in the back of your closet but everyone knows you have it!
    libragirl89 libragirl89 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 30

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    I always thought being married meant you'd have a best friend by your side. Having a best friend to me means someone who shared everything mutually, full transparency. Not...
    squirrelbounce squirrelbounce 41-45, F 1 Response a week ago

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    So far all my so called "best friends" aren't like best friends at all. I remember all of their birthdays every year and get them presents but no one seemed to remember my birthday...
    CloeSmile CloeSmile 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 25

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    Its quite overwhelming when its never enough and no matter how hard or how much you try it doesn’t make any difference which i find hard to deal with… You could try your...
    MilweePetite MilweePetite 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 7

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    Knock-knock. Who's there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes the police! Come out with your hands up!
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Nov 25

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    Even If She Don't Want Me- My youngest child has been in South America for 13 years since she was 7. My ex her daddy stole her from me during a weekend visit. A few days later she...
    StillFab45 StillFab45 41-45, F 1 Response Nov 27

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    nothing I do is enough and I still Get treated like crap by my family and my husband I have no friend or anything I feel like the world against me and I can't breathe I just want...
    Confusedandlonely04 Confusedandlonely04 26-30 1 Response a week ago

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    I want a cute female best friend that I can spend the night with. I wanna be able to cuddle with her and fool around just for the hell of it and have fun doing it. I'd love to have...
    ToriDianne ToriDianne 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 24

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    I want someone I can watch animes with and play games with and run with and go out on Fridays with and hang out on the weekends with and just be best friends withT_T
    thefightingangel thefightingangel 18-21, M 2 Responses Nov 28

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