Opening the tabs of my mind.
The child survives
the pump house,
the fear, the fear, the fear.
Be very quiet....disappear.
You don't have to hurt.
You can watch from afar.
The darkness is my peace.
I'm broken and I'm trying to put myself back together. I need support and i need to share my story. I've been abused sexually, mentally and physically. I suffer from depression and I coped with my stress by cutting. I have been in a hospital and now I'm better but I need to know...
I have my s.a.i.n interview Wednesday. It's an interview to see if the d.a has enough evidence to prosecute my abuser. It's 2:15 in the morning on a School night. I have to be in school in 5 hours but I can't sleep because I'm so worried about this interview. I want to sleep but...
and most vivid is from when I was 4.
It was a year or 2 after my parents divorced and my mother was in a downward spiral. Her boyfriend moved in with us. I remember now I never liked him but that could be a memory created on reflection.
He would send me at 4 to walk 4 block...
trying to "protect me" from different kind of things.
she would never let me do things that i liked, for example cheer leading claiming that it was dangerous.
Another thing she used to do was abuse me mentally emotionally and physically.
She would call me names and grab me and...