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I Was Raped and Feel Scared All the Time

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,101 People

    So I heard this joke today: " I like my women

    how I like my whiskey. Twelve years old and locked in my basement." I don't get upset by jokes such as these just because of the fact that they're JOKES, but it rubbed me entirely the wrong way. I was pissed. I chewed the kid who said it out in front of all of his friends. I'm...
    jbnichole jbnichole 18-21, F 3 Responses May 6

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    My Friend'S Dad

    It makes me so sad to look back at who I used to be. I mean yeah, I was probably naive, but I was 15, aren't you supposed to be? Growing up is supposed to be a gradual process, yet I had to grow up overnight. It was February the 3rd, 2012. My boyfriend had dumped me two months...
    delilahisabella delilahisabella 18-21 3 Responses Apr 3, 2013

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    Ripping Me Away

    She got stolen. Her only piece of life. Her identity. The monster took it away. There was no one to save her. The girl was trapped in the mirror. The monster tore apart her identity to shreds and all the girl could do was sit in silence and wait until the monster was done...
    danielle18 danielle18 18-21, F 20 Responses Jun 18, 2013

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    My birth father beat,

    raped, and tore me down.. I moved out and live with another family.. I have been gone over a year and I still am jumpy with this new family..
    alliegirl1452 alliegirl1452 22-25, F 2 Responses May 4

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    When I was younger (7) my cousin (9) began

    molesting me. He would do it every time I went over to my aunt aka his mothers house. My family are pretty close, and so I went there often, along with my other cousins. He would take me to private areas like his room or outside in the backyard and he would touch me...
    BVNG BVNG 13-15, F 6 Responses Jul 18, 2014

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    I was a virgin before it happened.

    He got mad at me for bleeding so much. He choked me until I passed out. I'm afraid to go to school because I have classes with him. Idk what to do anymore.
    thatgirlruth thatgirlruth 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 27

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    It screwed me up real bad.

    .. I know some girls get better, they even manage to help others. But he just made me feel so disgusting... and that's what I really am now. He constantly told me I was a wh-ore, I was nasty, that I wanted it and I'd be nothing without it and he was right. I'm not proud of who I...
    KittyCunt KittyCunt 18-21, F 4 Responses Mar 31

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    When I was 18 years old,

    I was raped. I have never really spoken of it before. One night, after the bar, completely intoxicated, me and my friend met a couple of English men. We had decided to go back to their hotel room. My friend ended up throwing up and fell asleep on the bathroom floor. Though I was...
    mitted mitted 18-21, F 8 Responses Mar 22, 2014

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    Yup. I was raped this past November.

    I don't really want to go into much detail about it. But it was by three high schoolers. I feel different. I hate my body more and I feel like I'm always dirty because of it. But thank god I am not pregnant.
    Divergent0 Divergent0 13-15, F 14 Responses Jan 25, 2014

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    I Was Raped... And No One Knows.

    I was raped in January 2012. I am only thirteen. This is my story... Please dont judge me. I lost my virginity at age twelve. My boyfriend at the time kind of pressured me into sex in the summer of 2011. I did want to,, but I am young I wanted to wait more than anything. I...
    AnonymousShadow AnonymousShadow 13-15, F 38 Responses Jul 31, 2012

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    I was rapped and molested almost all my life.

    my uncle use to touch me when I was younger and my older brother rapped and molested me since I was 8 until the age of 11 it stopped for 4 years I thought I was free but just last June it happened aging and that August everyone knew but didn't mean they belived me I haven't...
    Mandy1305 Mandy1305 16-17, F Apr 18

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    When I was 12, I was raped by a stranger.

    I'm 18 now & if I cant find happiness... I don't want to live anymore I feel like I don't deserve to be happy or that I even deserve to live. I constantly dwell about EVERYTHING I have ever screwed up, (even the stupid little things that everyone does from time to time, like...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Feb 7

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    And there's nothing that'll change that

    because things will never be the same. I don't even feel like I'm the same person. Like a part of me died inside.. I've always been the strong one, but right now, it's the hardest thing I can do...
    RainBow018 RainBow018 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 29

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    The Perfect Guy?

    I'm Laura and I'm 19. I want to tell you the story of how I was raped. I have never told anyone and every time I try to write about it I can't get it out. I just want someone to hear my story. I was 16 years old, and its been 3 years since I was violated by a man. He changed me...
    AFallenStar AFallenStar 18-21, F 25 Responses Oct 25, 2012

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    I Remember Too Much - Trigger Warning -

    Sometimes my brother needed to leave for several days at a time, often out wooing club owners on weekends to get them to give him a job, so he got one of his friends to stop over and stay with me. I was offended that he thinks I need a babysitter, but gave up on arguing with him...
    EmptyUnderMyHat EmptyUnderMyHat 16-17, F 4 Responses Feb 19, 2013

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    When i was 13 i was raped by my 15 year old

    boyfriend he forced me i tryed to get away but not go and i felt gross for awhile and again he raped me i had no way to run.
    Emogirlriley Emogirlriley 13-15, F 2 Responses Apr 11

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    LiliaAnne LiliaAnne 16-17, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    The Tragedy, The Wreckage.

    It's been 4 years. 4 years since you've raped me. I can't look in the mirror without feeling disgusted. I can't sleep without seeing your face laughing at me. It disgusts me that you did this. It makes me want to puke. I have no hatred towards you. I just have questions...
    zbubbly603 zbubbly603 18-21, F 5 Responses Mar 3, 2014

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    The 7 Strangers

    Hi! My name is Sophia. I am 15. When I was 14, I had a horrible experience. I was raped. It was after practice. I was waiting for my mother to come and pick me up. Then, a strange man walked up to me. I didn't know him, but this was common. At my school there is a very common...
    thebrokendream thebrokendream 16-17, F 20 Responses Jun 10, 2013

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    It's been over four years

    and I still have flashbacks to that terrible time. Four years.....four long years......I am healing, or at least that is what I tell myself. I am in college now and leading a fairly productive life....til another nightmare or flashback hits me. Then, it is all I can do to keep...
    survivorthrujesus survivorthrujesus 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 9

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    I was raped by my exboyfriend

    when we were still together... I was 14 and he was at the same age as me. He didn't physically rape me but mentally pressured me a lot and force me to have sex with him, and I was too afraid that if I didn't sleep with him it would end our relationship... I loved him a lot and I...
    qingxiaqiantong qingxiaqiantong 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 17

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    I need help. I can't cope with this.

    I was sexually assaulted in a mental hospital by my roommate and, even though I'm not sure if it counts as rape and it happened in November, I'm just now processing it. How do I tell my therapist? What did you guys do to deal with the emotions?????? I'm scared
    punicorn1 punicorn1 13-15, F 3 Responses Mar 29

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    Life After?

    I am a wife and a mother to 5 great kids. To avoid daycare costs my husband worked days for a distribution company and I worked nights at a gas station about 15 minutes from home.  There was many people to come in to my work.. some said hello and...
    lifeafter lifeafter 26-30, F 11 Responses Jun 1, 2007

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    Okay hi. My name is Katherine

    and I'm not the user of this account. She's allowed me to use "Experience Project" to share me story. When I was sixteen, I went out to get the mail for my parents. When I had the handful of letters, I began to walk back to my house, but a man stopped me. He looked to be about...
    Justagirllivinglife1 Justagirllivinglife1 13-15, F 3 Responses Mar 19

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    I was raped by my friend

    who goes to my school and he thinks nothing is wrong what should I do
    winstonhoward winstonhoward 13-15, M 1 Response Feb 23

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    This story is about my girlfriend being raped

    when she was little as 10. I REALLY need you guys' help in this one. Please read. It's been almost a year and a half since we started dating this pretty girl. After many failed relationships I finally found one girl who's really sweet and stood up to my dreams. However, I...
    Freedomzeeker Freedomzeeker 18-21, M 3 Responses Jun 13

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    People think that time heals all wounds I was

    raped when I was 14 I'm 19 now and even know I have flashbacks or cry when I fall asleep thinking about it. Rapist don't realise that the act they did has a life time affect on the victim for me he was my boyfriend for others it could be a stranger and family member a neighbour...
    elizachloe06 elizachloe06 18-21, F Feb 14

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    I'M Sick Of Being "The Victim"

    Alright guys prepare for a long story... Between 12-14 years old, I was raped on a daily basis by my moms boyfriend. Me and him were so close. He was like a father to me, and yet he totally took advantage of me at such a young age. He had a gun on him when it happened and told...
    seev4hn seev4hn 18-21, F 10 Responses Nov 14, 2013

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    How Much Was I Worth?

    Some writing from my blog www.diaryofabrokenchild.blogspot.com trigger warning for child sexual abuse. How much did they pay you daddy? How much was I worth? Was I a good girl, doing the things you had showed me since birth? You told me I was growing and said I was meant to...
    silverstar415850 silverstar415850 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 22, 2013

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    two weeks. in two weeks I will see your face.

    I will be sitting in that mahogany chair next to the judge telling my story to a bunch of strangers in suits. eyes will be watching me, even yours. I'll tell them how you forced yourself on me, and how your voice echoed in my head like a thunderstorm. like glass shattering. your...
    danielle18 danielle18 18-21, F 6 Responses Feb 3

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    This is a poem I have written about my

    experience of betrayal by someone close to me. I hope it helps someone else trying to come to terms with fighting "The Monster" all of us face when we have experienced rape. The Monster A warm familiar voice A reassuring hug A glad smile And whiskers that brush my face...
    purplemessenger purplemessenger 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 22, 2014

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    I Was Raped!!

    After I was legally separated I went out on my first date with a man that I knew for a year. He was my tae-kwon-do Master and he was also my children's instructor. I was at his studio 5 days a week for just little over a year. When he asked me out I was so excited as I not only...
    AlwaysRemembers AlwaysRemembers 41-45, F 49 Responses Mar 31, 2007

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    Well if you read my previous post you would know

    that I was raped... Yes that monster is in prison but I'm scared when he gets out he is going to come looking for me... He calls my phone from the prison from time to time and iv never answered... I would change my number but I wanna no if he is still looking so tht way I know...
    xxNicholexx xxNicholexx 18-21, F 4 Responses Nov 15, 2014

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    I was drugged and raped by a man,

    maybe more than one man. I wouldn't know. I remember nothing. 8 hours of my memory is gone. Along with other pieces of me. I woke up in my urine with blood on me and he drove me home, I was too drugged to realize what had even happened. Once I was in bed less intoxicated by the...
    experiencethroughme experiencethroughme 22-25, F 2 Responses Mar 16

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    I had had almost no experience,

    I was a virgin. I liked this older guy. We had talked a few times at school and he texted me late one night asking if I wanted to sneak out and go to a party. I was a pretty naive girl and I didn't drink or smoke or anything but I wanted to impress him. I snuck out and he told...
    chocolateandpugs chocolateandpugs 16-17, F 3 Responses Jun 3

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    Why can't I just let go,

    why does it have to be so hard, I don't want nightmares and flashbacks, I don't want to smell him and feel his stale breath, I want my life back, but I can't have it, because the night he did it the first time he stole my whole life away from me.
    lostgirl2001 lostgirl2001 13-15, F 2 Responses Jan 28

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    I'm so sorry this is happened to you,

    the same thing happened to me when I was 9 years old and it was my brother. For years I was raped over and over and forced to be touched by his friends, when I was 13 I had a breakdown in school and he was arrested. I was finally relieved but fate hated me and he was released...
    SecretSky27 SecretSky27 16-17, F 2 Responses Mar 16

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    I've been reading many of these stories

    and my heart has absolutely broken. Please, please if you are raped or abused I am asking you to please call the police. It's not something that 'just happens' it is not something that you can just shrug off. It is a crime. A heinous, disgusting crime. You do not want to protect...
    mandamooki mandamooki 16-17, F 5 Responses Jul 19, 2014

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    Emogirlriley Emogirlriley 13-15, F 2 Responses Apr 10

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    7 days ago i was beaten an raped.

    ....i spent the time after it happened hiding under my bed crying an couldnt stop replaying wat happened in my mind everytime i close my eyes i see it an im so scared.......
    SweetAngelFrostPup SweetAngelFrostPup 16-17, M 1 Response Feb 19

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    I have horrible dreams

    and wake up in the night sweating screaming and crying, I want to forget about my rape but I can't and its destroying me
    naturallyhappy naturallyhappy 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 15

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    I Was Raped By My Father

    He started molesting me at 2 or 3 years old .He slowly groomed me and trained me by terrorizing me into thinking he would kill my mother and brothers .If I didn't let him he beat all of us black an blue .At the age of 5 I told my older brother who was 11 what was going on but he...
    rcrisp rcrisp 36-40, F 39 Responses Jun 4, 2007

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    I Humbly Request Your Input

    It is difficult to ask this of a woman who has suffered through rape, but I'm not sure who better to ask for input. First, let me put this out there: I am a male. I am not looking to be turned on at the expense of your pain. So here's the situation. I am in the midst of writing...
    Sharpie7 Sharpie7 51-55, M 8 Responses Oct 18, 2012

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    Again

    He was here on Sunday and last night. And as I said before when he knocked I would answer. But, last night my 9 year old sister was home, too. I told her to lock herself in her room. She diddnt ask why she just did what I asked. When I thought she was safe I answered the door...
    Crazylover15 Crazylover15 18-21, F 10 Responses Jan 15, 2013

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    I was raped by a guy

    when I was 13 and now I'm almost 18 and that's why I became a lesbian and is why I'm scared to go around any guy I hate hate men there are nothing but pigs and I wish they would all die
    lizpup197 lizpup197 18-21, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    This happened on my birthday

    and I just turned 11. We were at a park.. & I was wearing a dress that my mom had bought for me that day; but anyways, me and my cousins were playing hide and seek. & when it was time to hide one of my older cousins tried to help me find a hiding place. (He was 17) So we went to...
    Ch3y Ch3y 16-17, F 7 Responses May 17

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