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I Was the Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 951 People

    I know this is a totally random poll,

    but I'm very curious and I must ask: How many OWs (current or recent) were cheated on by their husbands/boyfriends? I was. There seems to be a pattern: Women who were betrayed then go on to become the one with whom a man betrays another...
    celticwarrior96 celticwarrior96 36-40, F 1 Response Sep 9

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    I Was Their Nanny

    Please don't judge me, I already know I did wrong. I was 19 when I went to England to work as a nanny for a loving family in a small village. He was 39, his wife was 42. She was lovely, had a great sense of humour and just made anyone love her. She was a make up artist and went...
    isybusy isybusy 22-25, F 13 Responses Dec 23, 2012

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    I do not love you as

    if you were salt-rose, or topaz, or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off. I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, between the shadow and the soul. I love you as the plant that never blooms but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers...
    emadelemur emadelemur 26-30, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    I Fell Into The Trap Of A Married Man

    There is no good thing about an affair, unless you are not in love with the person. You can easily rid yourself of them. Jealousy, pain and loneliness is not worth ruining a marriage. If I could go back and change it, I definitely would. Married men just want you at first, then...
    LittleEdithBeale LittleEdithBeale 36-40, F 3 Responses Nov 18, 2011

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    Young And Caught Under His Spell

    Never in my life have I been in love. I'm to young for that. I am a good person, I never really get into any trouble. I am helpful, loving and kind. I am a respectful young girl with a promising future. Or I was. I went to the beach this summer on the east coast to work. I got a...
    LostLittleLadyBug LostLittleLadyBug 18-21, F 25 Responses Oct 3, 2013

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    Spoke to MM this morning,

    and I actually think that might be the last time. There was no big goodbye or any mention of an end to things, but I just have a feeling. I suggested to him to get rid of his second phone (if she finds it, they definitely be over for good, and that's not what anyone wants). He...
    l8rthanuthink l8rthanuthink 26-30, F Jul 20

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    This is the aftermath of my situation: Once

    things ended between us my initial reaction of course was sadness. I was sad that I had lost him. Sad that things had to end. Sad that after all the times we had nothing became of it in the end. Sad that I was in the exact same spot he found me. But after sadness came anger. I...
    stella517 stella517 26-30, F 1 Response May 28

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    Can a mind expanded ever go back to it's

    original dimensions? Surely not, but how to cope knowing what you now know, but living in limbo between the two? If someone could possibly answer me this. In short, how to stop with the comparisons between what you had, what you know and what you now have sexually. I want to...
    emadelemur emadelemur 26-30, F 7 hrs ago

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    That's it. After nearly 3 long years of a

    roller coaster ride, ups downs, highs, lows. Lots of good times but more upset and heartbreak than you would imagine. It's over. I am set free from this situation completely. No contact no more false hopes nothing. I pick myself up and my life starts now. I will never ever be...
    CastNoShadows CastNoShadows 26-30, F 11 Responses Jul 25

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    Our Story

    I no longer live in his heart....so there is no need to wake in his world. Our story is complete. The pages are written. It is filled with love, heartache and triumph, happiness, erotic sensuality and undying emotions. It is our love story. You and me. Our breathtaking magical...
    quietstorm48 quietstorm48 46-50, F 4 Responses Jun 26, 2013

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    Over one month no contact.

    .. I am finally letting go...
    Dreamgirl75 Dreamgirl75 36-40, F 2 Responses Sep 6

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    Buckle in, because this could be a long one.

    My first "adult" job out of high school was in an office, working as a secretary/personal assistant -- a horribly clichéd setting, I know, but I suppose they are clichés for a reason. It was a government setting, and I worked for a high-profile man with a reputation people...
    mackenziesaxon mackenziesaxon 18-21, F Feb 12

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    They broke up and she moved out a month ago.

    Things have gotten much better between us. We still haven't revealed things between mutual friends because we don't want anyone to suspect it's been going on while they were still together. Plus she probably isn't ready to find out about it. We do get to spend more time...
    PatientHeart PatientHeart 31-35, F Aug 30

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    I haven't seen him face to face

    since August 8th. over 2 months of no contact and then at exactly midnight, EXACTLY midnight on the eve of my birthday, his familiar text tone rang. And scared the sh*t out of me as I lay in bed laughing at Zoey Deschanel. I wasn't really laughing a whole lot those days, so it...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 36-40, F 5 Responses Feb 20

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    Has anyone else experienced this?

    When you're single and available, it seems like no one is interested. Then when you're in a relationship, guys come crawling out of the woodwork wanting to be with you? And the real kicker to me is when they act all upset because you won't drop your relationship to be with them...
    dropdeadredhead dropdeadredhead 36-40, F 2 Responses Aug 29

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    I was the other woman unknowingly at first &

    all it got me was pain,heartache,lies,deciet,low self esteem & for my loyalty I got called every nasty name in the book & horrible things said to me for doing the right thing & ending it. I loved him unconditionally & I'll miss what we had at one time, but too much has been said...
    Lovingmyselffirst Lovingmyselffirst 36-40, F 2 Responses Apr 22

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    Here are things I learned

    while I was the other woman. 1. It does not look pretty from the outside. - I recently watched a movie where a man was cheating and it was hard to watch since in was in the same situation BUT it just looked bad. I felt from the wife/girlfriend, I felt for the other woman and...
    stella517 stella517 26-30, F 7 Responses May 28

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    Things to consider about affairs.

    Most never leave the marriage. You can do the research. Even if they do leave the marriage, only 3-5% of relationships that began as affairs end up in marriage. There is a 75% divorce rate for marriages that began as affairs. There are many more problems faced by a couple...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    My ex MM had his big art show opening in London

    last weekend. He was written about in the Huffington Post. He is about to become very wealthy and famous. I'm happy for him. However, even though we have had no contact for about a month, hearing about him from friends, etc has triggered my feelings of missing him. So, this...
    nycgrrrl nycgrrrl 41-45, F 4 days ago

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    It was 4am when he knocked on my door this

    morning. Like really? He's been away from his family for 12 hours and instead of going home, he drives all the way over here. He wanted to tell me he loves me....yea ok. So I ask him how his girlfriend and children are doing. He wanted to kiss me. I told him to go home and kiss...
    Doodles2008 Doodles2008 36-40, F 4 Responses Jul 7

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    I'm going in to work today.

    Not even a week after we broke things off. I have to be strong! I can't even smile longer than I should. I learned my lesson. I know who he is and WHAT he is. The door to that relationship is closed. No stolen glances, no secret smiles just BUSINESS! HE text me yesterday. I...
    nmurch37 nmurch37 36-40, F 1 Response Jul 15

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    Unknowingly I was the other woman.

    He lied and said he was divorced. It was strictly an internet affair. When we made to plans to meet he disappeared. It wasn't until I went digging for answers to close out that part of my life that I found out he was married. The reason he disappeared was because his wife found...
    cutsy cutsy 36-40, F Jul 26

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    I Did It...

    I ended it. I didn't hear from him for several days, then he calls me yesterday as if nothing is wrong. I just realized that for 15 months, this has been entirely on HIS TERMS and that's not acceptable to me anymore. With Christmas and New Years coming, who will he be with...his...
    tallngreeneyed tallngreeneyed 46-50 11 Responses Dec 21, 2011

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    After Leigh told us that her MM had passed away

    and how she hoped he had cleared his phone...and foreverwanting more shared that her OM's GF found pitures in his phone resulting in a D-day; I got to thinking about my own phone. I'm not in my "affair" anymore, and I am newly married to someone other than my exAP. But, I have...
    dropdeadredhead dropdeadredhead 36-40, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Ahhhh 😁😊😅 Well everyone at work was

    rooting for me and the new super hot guy at work to talk to each other , people were telling him to come talk to me and people were telling me to go up to him and talk to him ..... Lol So he knew I was interested and I assumed he was interested Well after my second break I...
    Ellen1503 Ellen1503 22-25, F 4 Responses May 23

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    I Will Never Be Again

    He said he loved me for about a month, and that he loved me more than he loved her, till I went crazy jealous because he would not leave her. He admitted he didn't love me anymore after that, but that he still cared. I was still in love or thought I was anyways. I am terrible...
    jlimones jlimones 26-30, F 4 Responses Jul 9, 2013

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    Lately I've been questioning myself a lot

    lately, "How was I not worth it?" Or "Was I not worth it for him to fight on my side?" I would replay our time together and all the memories were good. I was always good and understanding to him. I let him put me through that hell without pressuring him to be with me. We became...
    stella517 stella517 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 1

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    It has been 5 years since we've last spoke.

    I wasn't at all interested in what you had to say. I was just curious to know how you turned out, and your family since I've left. Your wife wants to leave, she can't stand being with you any longer. I guess you got what you wished for after all these years. Your daughter is...
    allinlove allinlove 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 3

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    He Died In My Arms

    He Died In My Arms. Posted February 10th, 2012 at 9:12AM We met a little over a year ago...instant attraction both physical and emotional. Our bond grew with each passing day talking for hours when possible, sharing what was happening in each others lives....kids, grandkids no...
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Feb 10, 2012

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    It's been two whole weeks

    since he left me crying on the bed saying he couldn't do this anymore. The guilt of her, and of me apparently. I've been so lost without him. It takes everything I have not to contact him. It's hard. Last time he broke things off, I was the one to say something and he said he...
    rainydays2 rainydays2 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 6

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    celticwarrior96 celticwarrior96 36-40, F 6 hrs ago

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    It's been 6 days , had to count today

    because normally by a few days I'd unblock him just to see if he'd contact me Proud to say he hasn't been unblocked and he won't be nor do I desire any sort of contact from him I really am done this time , and yes I've hurt, I've cried , I've ached and gone through all the...
    Ellen1503 Ellen1503 22-25, F 6 Responses Jun 9

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    Unknowingly in 2008..

    . Here on EP, someone stole my soul and invaded 5 and a half years of involuntary celibacy. Sweet words, lies that they had broken up. Never again.
    TheWomanWhoDid TheWomanWhoDid 36-40 1 Response Jul 30

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    I Want To Know?

    I never thought of myself as the other woman until recently, maybe as I am married too. I had lots of major traumas in my life and a husband of many years who does not emotionally connect with me and could not support me through the traumas. I fell in love with my MM, truly...
    deleted deleted 26-30 13 Responses Oct 26, 2013

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    When did I got involved with a married man?

    About 6 months after I found out the man I loved, and was planning a wedding with, was cheating on me – not with one woman, but with two. My entire world as I knew it crumbled, right before my eyes, all within the course of a few days. I packed up my things, left the...
    celticwarrior96 celticwarrior96 36-40, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    If anyone has read any stories off my profile,

    they know my story. But, for those of you that don't, I will quickly tell you. I have been married to my hubby for 12 years and we have 4 wonderful children. Our marriage has been on a decline for a while. I've tried everything to make things work. I mean everything. Over the...
    NothinginmyWAY NothinginmyWAY 31-35, F 10 Responses May 31

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    *sigh* Three weeks without him.

    It still seems so surreal that he is no longer in my life. I did the "right" thing. I walked away from the deepest love I have ever felt all because he is married. And in his absence, all I feel is Emptiness Sadness Failure I failed. Funny how as the OW, I feel failure. I...
    insouciant1 insouciant1 41-45, F 5 Responses Apr 23

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    To all other women/past other women: I am

    happy to say I've moved on. A few days ago I saw him and it was the most awkward and heartbreaking experience. I haven't seen him in months and I suddenly run into him. I was stunned naturally and I can see he was too. We just stared at each other for minute unsure of what to...
    stella517 stella517 26-30, F 4 Responses Aug 15

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    I spent a great deal of time during my affair

    trying to understand why a 62 year old man, with beautiful wife and a seemingly good marriage would risk an affair with me. It bothered me that I could never pin point 'why' and why me? Was he interested in me to 'see if' it was better with someone other than his wife? Was he...
    Breeze62 Breeze62 51-55, F 6 Responses Jul 30

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    No matter what happened.

    Even though he went back to his family. I still think my man is a great guy. I wish him happiness. I wish myself a new relationship with a single man soon / someday. Maybe someone like him. But single. I still miss him everyday. And i know i still love him. (Sigh) but what can...
    AtPeaceEros AtPeaceEros 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 13

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    I was the mistress to a 47yr man

    for over a year. I call it being a mistress now because of how things ended, but let me take you back to when I moved mountains for this man. It all started when I became his secretary. The late nights and attention to detail quickly turned into a sexual relationship. We...
    rosylovecheeks rosylovecheeks 26-30 6 Responses Jul 29

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    2008

    This was the year that my life truly started I believe. I was working as a private photographer and was hired by a woman to photograph her family's Christmas party. When I arrived, she was very very bitchy and expected me to do more then what she'd hired me for. Shortly after...
    FreyaQ FreyaQ 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 24, 2013

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    I Leave You To Be Married

    I wonder, as I am reading an email from MM and he is telling me that he just wants me. How does he still come up with those words?? We haven't seen each other for awhile yet he still feels the need. It's not as if we were ever in a place where I wanted him to leave his family...
    quietstorm48 quietstorm48 46-50, F 3 Responses May 28, 2013

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    So....I met someone. And he is

    so awesome AND single and so sweet and so just into me....y'all it feels fantastic. Trust me...when they say we deserve better, they mean it....and better is by far greater than any "love" they could ever give us. #staystrongdontgoback
    Doodles2008 Doodles2008 36-40, F 5 Responses Jul 25

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    It's been 2 years and 5 months

    since I last heard from the married man I was seeing. He got scared when I found out I was pregnant and ran back to his wife and cut all communications after being with me for almost 3 years. I had to find out from his sister that he decided to end things. I didn't really get a...
    TemptingLust TemptingLust 26-30, F 4 Responses Mar 5

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    It's been 2 weeks now

    since my mm walked away and things are still falling apart for me. He still hasn't called or nothing. Me and my mm became business partners, I trusted him. And now I feel cheated. The first business was doing good so we decided to open another one in a different state. He...
    rosylovecheeks rosylovecheeks 26-30 4 Responses Jul 31

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    Although its been almost 2 years

    since we been together last I still think of you everyday It's okay tho. I know we will most likely not be together Anytime in the future ! But hey who knows what the future holds ! I like to think your happy . But your pictures I can sense sadness in your eyes ! The same...
    ifollowmyownstar ifollowmyownstar 31-35, F 2 Responses Apr 22

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    After he chose to be with her

    and we moved on our separate ways, he is back again. Begging to take ma back. He finally left her. For the past 3 weeks my phone was full of calls from unregistered numbers. Telling he i will be killed or skinned alive or to tell me they ( i think its just a she) know where i...
    AtPeaceEros AtPeaceEros 31-35, F 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    This is the first time I wrote something like

    this, if you cared enough to read...Thank you.. On the other day I saw a post here that said something like "we -the other women- are not so bas as people think we are.." This sentence kept playing in my mind since then.. & I can't believe what I have gotten myself into.. I'm...
    ShallowPink ShallowPink 18-21, F 4 Responses Jul 11

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    D Day was a week ago.

    Seven days, no contact, I miss him...
    Dreamgirl75 Dreamgirl75 36-40, F 3 Responses Aug 9

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    Just wanted to update Still seeing the other

    guy ( single ) Still over engaged man , he's tried to get back to me but I've denied him time and time again and now he hates me which is fine ... Currently pregnant .... Yep yep There is hope I deserved better and got it I hope lol
    Ellen1503 Ellen1503 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 11

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    Being The Other Woman

    I've been reading and reading and it sadly doesn't surprise me how judgmental some people can be, but on the flip side it doesn't surprise me to see kind words and encouragement. Being the other woman is probably the hardest life experience I've ever endured, yet somehow it...
    harderthanithought harderthanithought 31-35, F 13 Responses Jul 4, 2013

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    Women And Men

    I wanted to share some basic thoughts I have because I feel that men are suffering as much as we are in some form. One thing that we should realize is that human emotions are real even for men. But they ARE able to compartmentalize. They just are. And we have to except that...
    quietstorm48 quietstorm48 46-50, F 5 Responses Jun 3, 2013

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