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I Was the Other Woman

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,065 People

    Taumilynn Taumilynn 36-40 May 10

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    kathrineh kathrineh 46-50, F May 10

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    Would like the opinions

    and Im open to all opinions not just my own about LOVE, LUST and Obsession in affairs. Just curious how different people view this? Now in my opinion an affair of any sort is something like a drug. Everyone knows its bad for them and can cause considerable damage yet some get...
    SarahV6 SarahV6 22-25, F 5 Responses Jun 22

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    I wonder if the urge to message him will ever

    go away? But screw on opening up that pandora's box again !! Almost 3 months strong
    Countrygirl3632 Countrygirl3632 18-21 Jul 17

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    When I was a teenager; young

    and completely stupid! And it usually does not end well. I have certainly learned from that mistake! I am a better person today because of it. Circumstances really do make us what we are...
    FelicitySmoak FelicitySmoak 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 23

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    it's been almost two months

    since my MM went back to his wife. I have started therapy. which I highly recommend to every woman that has ever suffered through the highs and lows of being in love with a man. I have slowly begun to heal and move on with my life. I have discovered that I was wrapped around his...
    justagirl44 justagirl44 31-35, F 7 Responses Jan 10

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    Two years ago, I became best friends with a

    married woman I would babysit/nanny for. Mid thirties, in great shape; she was like a big sister to me. We would go shopping and she would buy me clothes even. I felt she was coming on to me but didn't think much of it. Well, one day we shared a dressing room to try some new...
    emmsbody emmsbody 18-21, F 5 Responses Nov 9, 2014

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    I don't want anymore secret friendships .

    .. I'm tired of being the other woman. Tired of its complicated ... You are an adult sort it out..I want something I can be proud off
    1spicygirl 1spicygirl 26-30, F 3 Responses Apr 22

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    I was the other woman unknowingly at first &

    all it got me was pain,heartache,lies,deciet,low self esteem & for my loyalty I got called every nasty name in the book & horrible things said to me for doing the right thing & ending it. I loved him unconditionally & I'll miss what we had at one time, but too much has been said...
    Lovingmyselffirst Lovingmyselffirst 36-40, F Apr 22, 2014

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    One year ago today, we agreed to NC.

    I still think of him every.single.day. I know I will never again find a love so deep and passionate, but I also know I will never find a love so beautifully painful. I wonder if he knows it's been a year...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 41-45, F 4 Responses Jul 10

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    Being The Other Woman

    I've been reading and reading and it sadly doesn't surprise me how judgmental some people can be, but on the flip side it doesn't surprise me to see kind words and encouragement. Being the other woman is probably the hardest life experience I've ever endured, yet somehow it...
    harderthanithought harderthanithought 31-35, F 13 Responses Jul 4, 2013

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    The very first time tonight in 2 1/2 years,

    no "Good night love. See you in my dreams. I love you to Mars and back..." That really hit me when I realize it's past his bedtime. Last night was my last... Wasn't prepared for how much this hurts. God, please give me the strength to go on!
    Aisurukoto Aisurukoto 41-45, F 5 Responses 6 days ago

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    It's been 6 days , had to count today

    because normally by a few days I'd unblock him just to see if he'd contact me Proud to say he hasn't been unblocked and he won't be nor do I desire any sort of contact from him I really am done this time , and yes I've hurt, I've cried , I've ached and gone through all the...
    Ellen1503 Ellen1503 22-25, F 4 Responses Jun 9, 2014

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    It's a year later and

    as crazy as it seems,I had an interview today and I think it went well just was kinda wishing I could share it with him,good,bad or ugly he was always the 1st person I wanted to share it with, but I have to remind myself he isn't there, makes me sad...
    kathrineh kathrineh 46-50, F 3 Responses May 15

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    That's it. After nearly 3 long years of a

    roller coaster ride, ups downs, highs, lows. Lots of good times but more upset and heartbreak than you would imagine. It's over. I am set free from this situation completely. No contact no more false hopes nothing. I pick myself up and my life starts now. I will never ever be...
    CastNoShadows CastNoShadows 26-30, F 9 Responses Jul 25, 2014

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    Advice from myself to all others out there in

    similar situations - never undo no contact when you know it's totally over beyond words. Never allow that scar to be ripped open. It's not worth the pain, but not only that, the mm will never change and suddenly leave his w. Even if it's been over for months or years, it still...
    CastNoShadows CastNoShadows 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 22

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    When will this longing

    for him go away? It has been 8 months since I saw him...5 months since our last communication... I know it is over, yet I still miss him... I cannot believe my feelings are still here...
    Dreamgirl75 Dreamgirl75 36-40, F 3 Responses Jul 15

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    I miss him today for some unknown reason.

    I think sometimes I just hate being single and wish I had someone special to talk to. šŸ˜ž
    Radiantlovingwoman Radiantlovingwoman 41-45, F 1 Response May 7

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    Ahhhh šŸ˜šŸ˜ŠšŸ˜… Well everyone at work was

    rooting for me and the new super hot guy at work to talk to each other , people were telling him to come talk to me and people were telling me to go up to him and talk to him ..... Lol So he knew I was interested and I assumed he was interested Well after my second break I...
    Ellen1503 Ellen1503 22-25, F 2 Responses May 23, 2014

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    I haven't posted in a while

    but I just wanted to update everyone on my situation. So it's been over 5 months since things ended and I feel good. Not to say that it was an easy 5 months, I definitely had my low point but I saw the end. Since things got exposed he broke up with his girl but I knew us getting...
    stella517 stella517 26-30, F 1 Response Oct 26, 2014

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    I find it all ironic.

    My MM shared with me details, thoughts, hopes and dreams he never would share with his own wife. Why? Because I'm the one who gets him and in his own words, "loved him and treated him better than his own wife or mother". When his wife found out about us the first and second...
    Mizzery101 Mizzery101 36-40, M 6 Responses Jun 13

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    I slept with my first married man

    when I was 19. My ex boyfriend from freshman year got married to his senior year sweetheart. Two weeks into his marriage, we reconnected and slept together. I knew it couldn't last. He was a very sensual man, and I desired it so much. After two months, we ended it. We had...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jun 11

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    So this is it... My first post in the "WAS"

    section... I have now ended the "affair" and I haven't seen him in 2 weeks. He was begging me to see him at the weekend. It took a lot, but I refused. He asked why I won't see him as friends, he still wants me in his life etc, he can't live without me. This enraged me for...
    DefinitelyDollie DefinitelyDollie 22-25, F 3 Responses May 12

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    As people always say,

    it's a long story which ended almost 3 weeks ago. We're getting along quite well on a long distance relationship. Iā€™m married, he lives with her girlfriend and has been cheating on her even since she became accidentally pregnant. That's 7 years ago. He shared and trusted me...
    lenamar2007 lenamar2007 31-35, F Jun 29

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    I Want To Know?

    I never thought of myself as the other woman until recently, maybe as I am married too. I had lots of major traumas in my life and a husband of many years who does not emotionally connect with me and could not support me through the traumas. I fell in love with my MM, truly...
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Oct 26, 2013

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    Opinion. If your ex-mm works out at the same gym

    as you, would you stop going? He's a creature of habit so he goes at the same time every night and I would be out of there before he gets there. Chances of us seeing each other would be slim and even if we did, I wouldn't care but I know it might be awkward especially if he...
    Radiantlovingwoman Radiantlovingwoman 41-45, F 3 Responses May 12

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    libby59 libby59 46-50 2 Responses Jul 1

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    I know from my own experience

    that married men don't always leave the wife. I am the wife. I found out two years ago my husband had an affair with some married woman that he met at our kids school. When I found out I gave my husband the option to leave. 50/50 with the kids and assets. I told him I didn't...
    Truthbetold81 Truthbetold81 31-35, F 3 Responses Apr 26

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    Although its been almost 2 years

    since we been together last I still think of you everyday It's okay tho. I know we will most likely not be together Anytime in the future ! But hey who knows what the future holds ! I like to think your happy . But your pictures I can sense sadness in your eyes ! The same...
    ifollowmyownstar ifollowmyownstar 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 22, 2014

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    My first post in "I was".

    ..hmmm. Seems almost surreal. He found a way back in and now I'm just getting resentful. I don't want to rehash my story. If you're interested you can read my other posts. I am making some fantastic changes in my life. I mean really friggin' exciting stuff for me, and here he...
    ravenofthedark ravenofthedark 41-45, F 1 Response Jul 10

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    Here are things I learned

    while I was the other woman. 1. It does not look pretty from the outside. - I recently watched a movie where a man was cheating and it was hard to watch since in was in the same situation BUT it just looked bad. I felt from the wife/girlfriend, I felt for the other woman and...
    stella517 stella517 26-30, F 5 Responses May 28, 2014

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    I have wondering where to message

    and get some thoughts on my situation and thought maybe this is the place. I don't want to be beat up at all or told I am idiot, because I am actually a very highly educated woman and believe in true love. I started building a solid friendship with a man whom I was NOT attracted...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response 5 days ago

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    2008

    This was the year that my life truly started I believe. I was working as a private photographer and was hired by a woman to photograph her family's Christmas party. When I arrived, she was very very bitchy and expected me to do more then what she'd hired me for. Shortly after...
    FreyaQ FreyaQ 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 24, 2013

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    Things to consider about affairs.

    Most never leave the marriage. You can do the research. Even if they do leave the marriage, only 3-5% of relationships that began as affairs end up in marriage. There is a 75% divorce rate for marriages that began as affairs. There are many more problems faced by a couple...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Dec 15, 2013

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    Young And Caught Under His Spell

    Never in my life have I been in love. I'm to young for that. I am a good person, I never really get into any trouble. I am helpful, loving and kind. I am a respectful young girl with a promising future. Or I was. I went to the beach this summer on the east coast to work. I got a...
    LostLittleLadyBug LostLittleLadyBug 18-21, F 25 Responses Oct 3, 2013

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    Question: do any of you women feel like a

    failure once it ends? Almost like he's sitting back with his wife laughing at how stupid i was for believing his lies? My Ex-mm and his wife are wealthy, successful, have two "perfect" daughters who get whatever they want and need while I live paycheck to paycheck, struggle to...
    Radiantlovingwoman Radiantlovingwoman 41-45, F 9 Responses May 5

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    Couldn't Take It Anymore...

    We met online but had so many connections it just seemed natural that our friendship developed into a relationship. I knew from the very beginning that he had a girlfriend but he always swore he was miserable with her and was going to break up with her because he loved me and...
    kzoodiana kzoodiana 36-40, F 10 Responses Feb 10, 2012

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    6 years ago. When he finally left his wife I

    thought this was it. Now we have our chance. I was very wrong and stupid. Fast forward to now we have 2.5 year old. Now I'm stuck with the real him. Selfish vindictive spiteful. Used my son against me a few times because I do not want to be with him anymore. He's a bully. These...
    nikifox nikifox 31-35 3 Responses Nov 8, 2014

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    Does it ever stop hurting?

    Can you ever get to a place where your emotions don't range from sadness to bitterness to frustration and rage within seconds? After three years and a half years I was the one to finally make a decision since he never could. I thought he would leave her for all she's done to...
    Mizzery101 Mizzery101 36-40, M 5 Responses May 31

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    No matter what happened.

    Even though he went back to his family. I still think my man is a great guy. I wish him happiness. I wish myself a new relationship with a single man soon / someday. Maybe someone like him. But single. I still miss him everyday. And i know i still love him. (Sigh) but what can...
    AtPeaceEros AtPeaceEros 31-35, F Jul 13, 2014

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    Yeah, other than my ex

    when I was 19, I don't sleep with married men long enough to be the "other woman". It's usually just the one night (or two). Not all of them are that as great in bed as they claim, anyway.
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jun 16

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    Our Story

    I no longer live in his heart....so there is no need to wake in his world. Our story is complete. The pages are written. It is filled with love, heartache and triumph, happiness, erotic sensuality and undying emotions. It is our love story. You and me. Our breathtaking magical...
    quietstorm48 quietstorm48 46-50, F 2 Responses Jun 26, 2013

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    I ended things with this mm

    but we live so close to each other. So it's been hard to not see him. But we do still talk and last time was in the park. He had this grin on his face and he came over to me. We talked but I do think he seeing another woman. Not sure weather he lives there still not seen him...
    stupid28 stupid28 31-35, F Apr 24

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    My Boyfriend broke up with me in December 2014.

    We were together for four years. I was devastated. He started dating a minor in the same month, but did not tell me anything. I found he did not ask her out, but it was her who asked him out. He did not even show any interest until she did. Even though he broke up with me we...
    yellowgreen yellowgreen 22-25, F Jul 11

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    I've been with a lot of men

    or women who were already in relationships, and I know I've probably caused fights and breakups. I feel so guilty about it. Sometimes I'm just too much of a wh-ore to be a good person :/
    KittyCunt KittyCunt 18-21, F Apr 1

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    To all other women/past other women: I am

    happy to say I've moved on. A few days ago I saw him and it was the most awkward and heartbreaking experience. I haven't seen him in months and I suddenly run into him. I was stunned naturally and I can see he was too. We just stared at each other for minute unsure of what to...
    stella517 stella517 26-30, F 4 Responses Aug 15, 2014

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