They stoped making Chuck Norris movies because you don't watch Chuck Norris he watches you
My family love to watch chuck Norris together, so much so we named our dog after one of his characters!
Chuck Norris doesn't bow to the Queen, the Queen bows to Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris is at the beach he doesn't get tanned the sun gets Chuck Norrised
Lucifer did not fall from heaven because he sinned. In fact, he was round-house kicked by Chuck Norris
The pyramids were actually built in 1950 by ten year old Chuck Norris after his mother confiscated his Legos for building a nuclear reactor with them.
New York never sleeps, out of fear that Chuck Norris might visit it in its' dreams.
Chuck Norris does not know Pain--Pain knows Chuck Norris, as it is roundhouse-kicked in the face daily by Chuck.
Chuck Norris took a wrong turn at the zoo and found himself in with Brutus the nasty Silverback Gorilla. Brutus was then seen politely showing Chuck to the exit door.
Chuck Norris won the 2014 Pulitzer Prize for his 874 page short story called "Me, Chuck Norris".
All this started with Vin Diesel Facts. They were changed to Chuck Norris Facts because Chuck Norris Facts are so much more realistic
Chuck Norris does not wear a condom because there is no protection from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris Breakfast: 1 nails, 2 scorpion tail, 3 deadliest spider venom, and 4, more Chuck Norris
Satan himself is a massive Chuck Norris fan, but Chuck made him member #777 just to **** him off.
What doesn't kill Chuck only makes him stronger. Chuck Norris is immortal.
Chuck Norris doesnt do the ice bucket challenge. Chuck Norris does the HOT LAVA BUCKET CHALLENGE.
Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick...
Chuck Norris pities Mr. T.
When you put Chuck Norris in your GPS, he's always right behind you.
Chuck Norris once won a karaoke contest humming
Chuck Norris can squeeze carviar out of a lemon.
Chuck Norris died, went to hell. Roundhouse kicked the devil, and came back.
Madonna was a quiet unassuming virgin before her date with Chuck Norris.
Tim Leatherman, inventer of the Leatherman multitool carries a Chuck Norris Tool.
Superman has a Chuck Norris tattoo.
On every continent of the world, there is a sandwich named after Chuck Norris. On the North American continent it's the Knuckle Sandwich.
Check yourself before you wreck yourself.......
Cos roundhouse kicks from Chuck Norris is bad for your health.
When Chuck Norris throws a boomerang, it comes back with a beer.
I m sure Chuck Norris has his own EP account .
I m not sure though , what his profile photo and nickname would be like
Chuck Norris set fire to the rain.
When Chuck Norris went to jail, the guards locked themselves up.
Chuck Norris can fly a car underground.
Chuck Norris wears a cowboy hat to protect the sun from him.
They were going to put Chuck Norris in Pokemon, but he always wins. If he lost, the save file would get corrupted for unexplained reasons.
In Pokemon FireRed and LeafGreen, you can only catch 386 Pokemon. In the same game, Chuck Norris can catch all 719 Pokemon. With a Pokeball.
Chuck Norris' favorite chewing gum are bullets.
Chuck Norris has won many a contest merely by showing up.
Chuck Norris can turn even the safest firework into an instrument of mass destruction.
The Empire never found the droids they were looking for.
Chuck Norris would have.
Chuck Norris recently killed a charging Rhino with a #2 lead pencil.