I Wish I Was As Strong As I Pretend to Be

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 941 People

    Fighting

    I grew up around boys so when I was younger I was socialised into a lot of their ways. I learned to be tough and not cry....this has stuck with me for years. I put up a wall and act like I am taking everything in my stride. But I am not - I am a scared little girl underneath it...
    Bonden Bonden
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jul 10, 2008

    Who Am I Kidding?

    ...I can barely even pretend to be strong. Even that flimsy fascade breaks down the moment the smallest hint of adversity strikes.
    Tuva Tuva
    31-35, M
    2 Responses Apr 30, 2011

    hey you!...not you who the world sees

    but YOU!! who is hidden behind that smile. what are you doing ey?? is this the life you grew up wishing for or is it someone else's choice? ask yourself...is this what you truly want?..
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Mar 13

    Courage is rightly considered the foremost of

    the virtues, for upon it, all others depend.. - Winston Churchill
    Volumes Volumes
    22-25, M
    Aug 17, 2014

    Most times I believe

    that I am. I have been able to achieve a lot, travel places and survive despite difficult circumstances. Yet still there are times that I feel like I'm not quite sure how I'm going to continue keeping up a bright, cheery and pleasant front for everyone. It would be nice to just...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Sep 4, 2014

    Me? Strong?

    I have people telling me all the time that I'm strong.  I just don't see it.  I feel like I have everyone fooled in that respect.  Maybe if they knew the real me, the one that is depressed all the time and constantly thinks about suicide, then they'd change...
    ShatteredSilk ShatteredSilk
    36-40, F
    6 Responses Mar 2, 2009

    Not As Happy As You Think.

    Why do I feel so alone when I am near the people I love, I am trying to prove to myself that I am happy and deep down I am not. I just want everyone to feel what I'm not feeling and that is pure happiness. I don't want to sound like a debbie downer because my entire life isn't...
    SeriuoslyJas SeriuoslyJas
    18-21, F
    Dec 2, 2013

    I pretend that the remarks about me don't hurt.

    I pretend when people are mean to me just for being me that I am 200% find when I fire back some smart *** remark. I talk back to people who give me ****. But when I get home, it doesn't stay away. It gnaws at me. I can't let things go people say. I have been depressed a long...
    taylerraye taylerraye
    16-17, F
    1 Response Oct 10, 2014

    Don't depend on me, I am just

    as lost. I am just as shaky. I am only trying as hard as I can. But I can't save everyone, I can barely save myself. Please don't depend on me too much.
    VioletVivid VioletVivid
    26-30
    Mar 3

    Episodic Weakness

    Recently my illusion that i have become strong as i have grown older has been shattered.. and i have had a lot of episodes when i have felt i m very emotional and sensitive... i get very upset for things which i shud be able to take in my stride.. and i m just not able to discuss...
    quietgeorge quietgeorge
    18-21, M
    1 Response Jul 29, 2008
    OrangeCaramel OrangeCaramel
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jul 12, 2014

    I'm always there for my friends,

    but when it comes to my mental health I'm bad at taking care of myself :/
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Feb 25

    Never Listened To

    I pretend every day that I'm not hurt...that I'm okay...that I'm not broken...but there's no way to stop the feeling of defeat that I have from everything. No one but one person really pays attention to me...even my own parents barely hear me when I'm saying something. In...
    DarkCelestriaRose DarkCelestriaRose
    18-21, F
    1 Response Oct 26, 2012

    Great Actor

    As of late ive been putting up a front I dont want to be the guy that gets walked over so I pretend to be ok with every thing thats going on. I cannt take it so time and I show my true side fear in my face and I hate my self for it I dont think I can be that guy for much longer...
    nickaman nickaman
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Jan 28, 2012

    I'm Not

    Eveything in me , could tell , that i'm strong ! i can fall , and then find my way to rise up , i can drwon , and still be breathing .. but i'm not as strong as that , i'm actually more vulnerble than i'll ever admit .. So they believed , the way i walk , look , and act...
    StableRedGun StableRedGun
    22-25, F
    4 Responses Mar 2, 2009

    The Only Way.._x

    the only way to cope with things is to pretend im strong, pretend im coping and let things pass over my head. if i show how vulnerable i really am, how much i really want to cry, and scream, and to stop all the fake smiles.  i wouldnt cope, i would just cause more...
    FromTheHeartOfaWoman FromTheHeartOfaWoman
    22-25, F
    26 Responses Feb 5, 2008

    I Long to Be Worthy of What I Have

    I don't deserve all the amazing things the world has given me. From the most fundamental, I have a 144 IQ and have basic beauty. Unfortunately, my brain is crippled by my childhood abuse. I have no self-esteem. I can fake it for awhile but its like paying 20 for gas everyday when...
    CrissyO CrissyO
    26-30
    6 Responses Jun 23, 2008

    Me : Stonger Than A Feather!

    I am probably going through some of the worst times of my life. So true! Or maybe this is just a period of stress…or maybe I am being smashed in the face for my own ignorance’s. Each reason that I have is based on the world being against me. I can’t justify anything but I...
    Michhhhnat Michhhhnat
    26-30, F
    2 Responses May 8, 2011

    Improve Your Life One Step At A Time

    I think there is a point in everyone's life where you have to decide if you want to improve your current situation. Most people I know would always want to improve something in their lives. Some of them make it happen whilst others try only to eventually fail in their attempts...
    gr8jesus gr8jesus
    51-55, M
    3 Responses Oct 2, 2010

    Life has been so hard lately coming out gay is

    harder than I thought it would be. A lot of people think I am strong but I suffer from depression, anxiety and a weak heart.
    Benji77 Benji77
    16-17, M
    1 Response Jul 8, 2014

    I act the saviour but in truth,

    I'm just another damsel who needs rescuing.
    VioletVivid VioletVivid
    26-30
    3 Responses Feb 23

    I pretend like I'm totally in control

    and I'm even excited about what's going on but really inside I'm shaking in my boots and just wishing someone would take my hand and tell me what I should do. Don't be mistaken though, because if that did happen in real life. I would be pissed and would tell them "ive got this"
    Hermione44 Hermione44
    31-35, F
    Mar 21

    My Biggest Lie "i'm Fine"

    Everyday i act like nothing is wrong like i have the perfect life so no one can see the real pain I've spent most of my life that I've so far lived perfecting the art of hiding my feelings and emotions i can't keep a relationship because once things start to go wrong i shut down...
    LostHope74 LostHope74
    16-17, M
    Nov 12, 2012
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Jul 7, 2014

    It's Alright

    i keep telling myself it's alright if people hate me, it's alright if people talk about me behind my back, it's alright if i have no friends. but its not.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Sep 7, 2012

    I'm going through a situation

    where I have to look/feel like I don't give a ****. it's killing me inside.
    neverlosethatfeeling neverlosethatfeeling
    26-30, F
    Mar 14

    *weak Smile*

    I could be imploding and I guarantee you'd never know it. Its because I don't want to burden other people with problems that are strictly my own. I'll joke with you, and laugh with you. I'll still be fun. I'll still listen to your troubles. Tear me down word by word, break my...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    2 Responses Feb 13, 2009

    We Are A Reflection Of Our Aspirations. Great!!!

    Many of the stories here have a negative spin on this subject but I'm here to tell you that it is a beneficial trait. People talk of how they feel like they are pretending and that they feel that they are living a lie but I believe that I see through this trait. You are a person...
    Explorethemind Explorethemind
    18-21
    Nov 1, 2012

    It Is Not a Question.

    It is not a question of why I pretend to be stronger than I really am, I have to be!  I cry and break down every day, but I do it in secret.  I have a 2 year old and am in a very unhappy marrage.  I cannot let my daughter see me cry, and see my...
    J21883 J21883
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Dec 28, 2008

    I Am Not a Hero

    "I am not a hero I am not an angel I am just a man! Man, who's trying to love her Unlike any other In her eyes I am!"   From the beautiful lyrics by Josh Groban 
    lonelyromantic lonelyromantic
    18-21, F
    1 Response Mar 22, 2008

    Strong

    You know out here in the real world with the job I have now I have to act strong.  But if you have read any of my stories on here you know deep down inside I am crying and stressed out.  I pretend to be happy and smile and I pretend to be tough but when it is...
    rondat rondat
    41-45, F
    21 Responses Dec 27, 2008

    If you ask anyone around me they might describe

    me as a smart ***, pessimist, or motherly. And that nearly sums me up. It's unintentional though. I use my sarcasm as a defense mechanism, a default personality if you will. It tends to change based on how well my peers get along with it or how comfortable I become with them. I...
    CassieWithAnO CassieWithAnO
    16-17, F
    Jul 12, 2014

    I lost my virginity to a one night stand.

    The experience itself was good and I really enjoyed the moment. Now that the dust has settled, I feel a bit empty and I hate that I feel judged and I am trying so hard to not be sad. I wanted my first time to be with someone that cared for me. Oh well. We live and we learn...
    sabrinalina sabrinalina
    26-30, F
    1 Response Jul 8, 2014

    All Kinds of Strength

    If you ask my friends or my family to describe me, I guarantee that one of the words they will use is "strong". I've been through some **** in this life, like everyone else, but somehow I always end up being the one that others rely on for support, rather than the...
    andyj823 andyj823
    26-30, F
    Nov 22, 2008

    I act strong I talk big I look tough.

    .. But inside, I'm no more than a coward... weak... 'A sorry excuse for a human being' my mind keeps repeating. It's hard to live in a family that's broken... No one to open up to. Sure, I have a caring enough mother, but we never really see eye-to-eye. She expects much of me...
    NicoBunny6 NicoBunny6
    18-21, F
    1 Response Oct 9, 2014

    I have depression and I hide it well

    but I am lonely because the only mask that could cover this up is the crazy one so I act crazy I do funny stunts and I tell weird jokes and I make cricket noises in an awkward silence then say awkward turtle. But because of that I have a long list of people who bully me and...
    MatildaBlack MatildaBlack
    16-17, F
    Jul 7, 2014

    I Wish

    i say that to myself everyday, people probably thing i'm strong, i'm the person who hols them together when they're down or have a problem, but it's just a mask i put on to get through the day. i wish i didn't have to pretend and that i really was strong. it would make life much...
    HiddenFallenAngel HiddenFallenAngel
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Mar 1, 2012

    Outwardly Successful

    I have a list of qualifications as long as my arm, I am happily married and am financially secure, I am considered 'successful and capable' by family, friends, colleagues and even people I have only just met but actually during my down times I feel a fraud and a failure on so...
    Cyclo1 Cyclo1
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Sep 2, 2012

    Head up, back straight,

    foreward face - *smile*, you nimrod. Don't let them know, or its all over... That's it, tuck your hair behind your ear, a lick of the lips; perfect placement of your hand on your hip. Don't **** up - that pain is yours, girl, so you keep it to yourself. Ain't no one gonna give a...
    iFortiTude iFortiTude
    31-35
    Mar 7, 2015

    I appear resilient, only

    because I have to be. All I am, and all I've done, I question myself every step of the way. I pick myself up every time I fall, but it is only after I struggle to find a reason to get up in the first place. I can take hits, but it does not mean all the hits don't leave scars...
    VioletVivid VioletVivid
    26-30
    1 Response Mar 21

    My family says they don't ask about my feelings

    because they say I'm super strong. It upsets me because they just assume and don't actually know.
    Mikah1022 Mikah1022
    16-17, F
    Dec 9, 2015
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