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I Wonder If I Deserve to Be Happy

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 218 People

    I Wonder

    I have never been truly and honestly happy. Content, yes, but not happy. If you are deprived of something for so long, you question its need, you think that you don't need that. Everyone wants to be happy. Everyone needs it at times. But not everyone thinks they can get it, or...
    jlsmonkey jlsmonkey 18-21, M 2 Responses Sep 28, 2010

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    I Sometimes Wonder If I Deserve To Be Happy.

      The reason why I feel this way is because of a family member when I was growing up.  I felt that I was never good enough and that my brother could do no wrong.  This family member was always, my brother this, my brother that, brother, brother, brother...
    candles24 candles24 41-45, F 3 Responses Apr 9, 2010

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    There Must Be a Reason

    I used to think everyone deserved to be happy. Now I think I have changed my mind. I snubbed my nose at life for many years, doing whatever I wanted and not paying to much attention to the consequences. I thought once I turned my life around things would get better. And they did...
    darlene darlene 41-45, F 6 Responses Jan 12, 2009

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    Seems Not So Much!

    If you look at my life and everything I do on and off EP, and believe me my little sissy does, one would think that happiness would be raining down on me with furious enjoyment. She gets mad for me because she is my biggest fan in life and it makes me laugh because I always...
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Mar 16, 2011

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    Unsure

        I'm not happy anymore. I want to be and I try, not to the best of my ability but I try. Sometimes I just don't think I deserve to be happy. I was once happy or happier and I left because I thought better things was out there and there wasn't. I left and now my...
    nurse2nice nurse2nice 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 10, 2008

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    Do I Really Deserve It?

    Sometimes I ask myself what did I do to deserve being unhappy?  I have a crappy job thankful I got one but nevertheless it's crappy.  Don't have no friends and no boyfriend.  What did I do?  It's like I'm being punished for something and I don't know what?  I try to be a...
    tngurl25 tngurl25 26-30, F 2 Responses Jul 8, 2011

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    Relapse

    I go in these constant waves of hopefulness and hopelessness. I can't seem to stop thinking about the what if's, the idea of death. It doesn't bring me fear, and that scares me. I just want to live, but I'm stuck on this endless one way street of regretting recovery and harmful...
    Brody1530 Brody1530 22-25, F 6 Responses Oct 10, 2013

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    Change Of Heart

    after giving it alot of thought, i have decided that it doesn't matter so much whether or not i deserve to be happy...i don't think that i'm meant to be happy.. no matter what i do i end up feeling depressed.. i spend time with my girlfriend, and when i'm with her, i feel happy...
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Jul 25, 2011

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    My Life And Confidence Babbling.

    Let me start by saying even when I had confidence it wasn't like OH MY GOD I'M BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE! No, it was more like just being able to have fun with out noticing the weird stares. I used to live in a little town called Roseville. Its in California near Sacramento...
    Wish2BeLoved Wish2BeLoved 18-21, F Sep 10, 2012

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    Everyone Deserves to Be Happy.

     Ben Franklin said, " Beer is proof God loves us and wants us to be happy". I'm very unsuccessful jobwize. I deal with a lot of depression because of that. I don't think that I'm fated to be unhappy.  Life has ao much good in it. It is just so easy to focus...
    Beauphord Beauphord 46-50, M 1 Response May 27, 2009

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    Dual Diagnosis

    i am just curious as to whether anyone else has these labels before i bore anyone with my tales of woe. A couple others that sort of round the whole personality out are OCD and dry drunk. Strangely as much as i would enjoy having someone to communicate with...i really hope that...
    Charismat Charismat 61-65, M Sep 21, 2011

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    angel510 angel510 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 6

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    Is Your Kilter On Or Off?

    do i deserve to be happy.? you know, i don't know what i was looking for when i came across this sight, but this question.. i had to stop. my question is.. from who's perspective? if i were to answer this question, i would say no. here in this tiny sample of my life, i will...
    compromised compromised 31-35 3 Responses Oct 27, 2008

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    I Want to Believe...

    i tell myself that i deserve to be happy but i'm not sure that self is buying it. i often experience feelings of intense guilt that are directly related to real happiness. the guilt becomes so unbearable at times that i have stopped creating art to sale, i have purposely...
    leftoversky leftoversky 70+, M 3 Responses Jul 13, 2008

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    Nobody Deserves to Be Happy

    Bad things happen to good people, and good things happen to bad people. I don't think anybody deserves to be happy nor miserable. Happiness is not earned. It's just gained. I am happy, but I do not believe it is because I deserve to be.
    jacqdn jacqdn 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 23, 2009

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    We All Deserve To Be Happy

    i have been dealing with this vehement and unyielding thought that i dont deserve to be happy, and i literally knew no one else who was dealing with this same problem, and there was no one i felt i could trust with this information, and no one i felt would understand. because the...
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Jul 1, 2011

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    The Answer Is

     yes you do. everyone deserves happiness.  Ben Franklin said, "Beer is proof God loves us and wants us to be happy".
    Beauphord Beauphord 46-50, M 2 Responses Jun 23, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    It's gotten to the point to where I don't think i'll ever be happy. I use to think maybe its because i want a boyfriend, or i want a friend but now i just don't think i can be...
    LiesGreedMisery LiesGreedMisery 18-21, F 1 Response 25 mins ago

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    My happy place is in my bed, headphones in, under the blankets, and basking in a cloud of pills and meds:) there's no death, no sadness, no murder, no police brutality, just...
    notsoprettyhatemachine notsoprettyhatemachine 18-21, M 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    For the longest time I have thought about love, about real true love. Always wondered what it was like, if it truly even existed. Not to say that have not been in love before. But...
    VenomKissssss VenomKissssss 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 3

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    I am a self destructor Any chance of happiness, I ruin. Anyone who loves me, I hurt. This isn't something I do on purpose, but I always set the wheels in motion. Then just...
    emzyxj emzyxj 22-25, F 3 Responses Aug 11

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    I have to keep telling myself ....I deserve to be happy. I don't deserve to be yelled at, called names, demeaned, manipulated or isolated. I control my own happiness. I have to...
    Happinessismine Happinessismine 31-35, F 4 Responses Aug 6

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    I am so fed of this life I keep trying for everything even when I fail to do so sometimes but I try and dont give up that easily and I know you will believe if u had my life story...
    Blackangel4u Blackangel4u 22-25, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    My husband of many many many years just asked me for a divorce tonight I knew it was coming he has had several girlfriends in the past year but he claimed he still was in love with...
    sweetmelissa77 sweetmelissa77 36-40, F 5 Responses Aug 3

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    Departure – Invoice precise and processed competently. We walked over to the jetty with a Sri Lankan Manager so it had been pleasant to debate his suggestions for Sri Lanka...
    Willy52yt Willy52yt 31-35, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Look all around and see things happening to people. not to me.. I am too awkward to even own a personality My social ineptitude brings forth all that i dont deserve. I am not happy...
    anisse113 anisse113 18-21, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I've went through a lot in my marriage of 14 years. For the past 5 years, I've always found myself very depressed and upset. One major damage was because my husband always thinks...
    Lynnlsc Lynnlsc 41-45, F Aug 12

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    I have always vowed that my future child/children would have a happy and stress free childhood no matter what.
    futureCRNA futureCRNA 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 12

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    I think I might of realized that I'm not alone. Finally. I realize this. I realize I deserve the absolute best; and this truly makes me so happy.
    shammypurry shammypurry 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 24

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    worst sound of happiness is a forced laugh from people trying to be happy.. even she's bleeding inside how ironic i see myself in her.. maybe it's just showing the wisdom in...
    shenghuidai shenghuidai 26-30, F 6 days ago

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    It's funny how looking through old photos can really put your life into perspective....how clearly you can see your life in chapters. I'm in a weird chapter of my life right now...
    SupernovaxGirl SupernovaxGirl 26-30 2 hrs ago

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    So I got married in June. I've known my husband for 7-8 years (lost track), been living with him for around 7 months, and dating for a year. We have a baby together. Last month he...
    Ealasme Ealasme 16-17, F Aug 19

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    I often catch myself thinking, 'he/she deserved better than that.' It usually comes with a heart pang or two, and also a great sense of injustice. The sad truth is that we all...
    PurpleGlassPalace PurpleGlassPalace 26-30 Aug 21

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    I wish not to cast an "air", put on airs as they say by gloating over all the wonder, love, excitement, blessings that has entered my life. But ...lol... I am so very happy. My...
    MorningBreeze MorningBreeze 56-60, F 4 Responses Aug 3

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    I am wondering what's the point in living, I have suicidal thoughts now and then. it just doesn't seem to ever really stop, you know? All the pain can stop for a while, but then it...
    dominiquekillz dominiquekillz 13-15, F 3 Responses Aug 7

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    I'm bipolar 1, this is quite common. Not saying it like a deserve an award for it, lol, just saying...
    Dayzdreamer Dayzdreamer 26-30, F 1 Response Aug 14

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    Especially SSBBWs.Although I love women of all sizes,huge beautiful girls simply make me melt.If you're over 300 pounds or want to get there(NO upper limit!)and would love to be...
    jjb6560 jjb6560 46-50, M 2 Responses Aug 19

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    There are commonplace wisdoms that go unquestioned more often than politics or religion now. I see people all the time bragging that they are not 'sheep' and then spouting these...
    dispossessed dispossessed 46-50, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    This is a short story about a girl I met on the train. It was roughly four months ago today when I had started getting the train from Hastings to Brighton for work. It only took a...
    Ashh2 Ashh2 18-21, M 2 Responses Aug 8

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    Opened my heart once again and like usual I'm thrown away like dirt I am. Always every reason I find good enough to use it to go on with my life it will always go away and make me...
    RedUnderground RedUnderground 16-17, M 1 Response Aug 6

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    Making people happy is my favorite. I've been told I'm really funny and I've had many times where my friends were laughing really hard :3 making someone smile can honestly do...
    megsupermaherio megsupermaherio 16-17, F Aug 7

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    When I look in the mirror, I see a young African American girl, with glasses and fancy hair. That always like to dress up and look nice, because she refuses to show the world...
    aviodthisnoid aviodthisnoid 13-15, F Aug 13

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    I don't know where they are but I wonder where all the punk/emo/scene boys who just get me are. Honestly if the sweet but badass punks where still around Id be so happy. I miss...
    mypoetryissad mypoetryissad 13-15, F Aug 14

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    I have met the most wonderful person here on EP. She has made me so happy and I look forward to every coming day so I can talk to her all over again. Thank you for coming into my...
    JemmimaS JemmimaS 36-40, F Aug 15

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    The Deluxe Seaside Villas with Jacuzzi dot the extensive seashores in the midst of the island. These villas aspect oversized picket patios with Solar loungers and daybeds, and...
    Augustina97sy Augustina97sy 31-35, M 1 Response Aug 21

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    The vacation resort has a hundred and sixty villas in 4 most important types of Seashore and garden villas, Duplex villas, spouse and children villas and drinking water villas...
    Dirkhxm2260 Dirkhxm2260 31-35, M 1 Response Aug 23

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    Behind Closed Doors-If I had to take a guess I would say people see a deeply unhappy person wearing a "happy face",so their egotistical old man doesn't have an anuresym. We are...
    SolomonSaul SolomonSaul 16-17, M 2 Responses Aug 23

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    Yes I am very happy I have a great guy. I'm a sub. I serve my Master. I do not NEED pics to prove who I am. I do not NEED pics to get horny. I'm capable of real conversation...
    vampirish vampirish 46-50, F Aug 24

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    com to ensure I'm able to learn about this provider failure in bigger detail. Thanks for finding the time to put in writing in about us and your suggestions is far appreciated...
    Magalyid72 Magalyid72 31-35, M 1 Response 5 days ago