I Would Like to Know What Your Pet Would Say If They Talked

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 137 People

    If My Dog Could Talk..

    He would say one thing without a doubt. He would say "I like turtles". For two reasons.1.) He likes turtles2.) He used to kidnap turtles from the pond, bring them to his little room, and let them go and catch them when they run away and bring them back
    WaywardCrows WaywardCrows
    18-21, M
    2 Responses Nov 13, 2011

    Snakorn Sez:

    Thank you mom for saving me when I meowed outside the house all night two years ago. I didn't have anybody. But I have to say I don't like the place we are in now because of that dirty bastard bossy Ricky and that big fancypants Lucy. Every time I see them I have to run because I...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Jun 3, 2010

    My Cats Would...

    bicker like teenage siblings, cuz thats what they act like!
    asensitivesoul asensitivesoul
    18-21, F
    Apr 14, 2010

    Easy Enough

     My cat does talk and I know what she is telling me.  It does not mean she gets her way or my dog either.  My dog mostly just farts and doesn't talk much.  He would just, "I will have whatever you are having for dinner.  You don't seriously expect me...
    Shaylon Shaylon
    26-30, F
    9 Responses Jul 21, 2009

    Jaws and Paws

    If my pet could talk he would say "How the ---- did I get hooked up with this woman.  I asked for a 7 year old little boy and the Doggie Director gave me THIS?   She plays with me only 5 minutes at a time and keeps me locked up like a major...
    7seas 7seas
    1 Response Jul 21, 2009

    Talking Fur Babies

    if you get a fur baby at a very young age you can teach them to talk and tell you what they want or need. of course it won't be plain english, but teach them sounds to make when they are hungry, want water , or need to go outside to potty. we have had one that if you really...
    deleted deleted
    Feb 23, 2011

    My Mickey

    I think he would tell me what's going on behind those adorable little brown eyes, and cuddly little nose.
    Bethybeezz Bethybeezz
    1 Response Aug 15, 2013
    softbunny6 softbunny6
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Apr 25, 2014

    If I Had a Pet, It Would Say...

    ..."Just because I walk around with no pants on doesn't entitle you to do the same, hooman." ..."Ever thought of installing a flush in my litter box?" ..."Wrap another ribbon around my neck and you die in your sleep."    
    freyaluna freyaluna
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Jul 23, 2009

    Please Stop..

    My dog would prolly tell me to stop talking in a high-pitch, baby voice. I do it all the time lol. Or I just go "Awwwww, you hungry?" I love my dog... :D
    HangingTree HangingTree
    18-21, M
    Jun 3, 2010


      Would you please start wearing some pants around the house!
    rescue3 rescue3
    31-35, M
    3 Responses Jan 21, 2010

    Motley Sez...

    In a rocker's cocky voice... "Pat me and feed me, tolerate my love nips...I ROCK, Mum!"
    TheRealWoman TheRealWoman
    31-35, F
    9 Responses Mar 26, 2009

    Gimme Gimme Gimme

    if my little pup could talk he would say, listen woman i need to keep with you twenty four seven, dont leave me alone or you will pay!, i will chew up your door your shoes your anything, because your not there. Dont even think about leaving me alone while im sleeping cos you know...
    thehippy thehippy
    41-45, F
    10 Responses Apr 7, 2009


    I have always wondered if our pets could talk what they would say.  My husband and I laugh at what we think his female German Shepard would say.  When we are making love she is usually laying in the corner on the floor and every once in a while you will hear her sigh...
    rondat rondat
    41-45, F
    5 Responses Dec 12, 2007

    My Crazy Hades My Beautiful Puppy

    I have 3 animals I have a 3 cats and a 1 year old puppy, and i often wonder what he is saying when he is running around barking at the cats, I sometimes think he is running around yelling playing with me play with me case me do something please, but the cats just ignore him and...
    bubble24 bubble24
    22-25, F
    1 Response Apr 7, 2009

    My Babies Would Say...

    "Moo-ooomm....no more baths!!!!"   They each get bathed every other weeks because SOMEONE ends up getting into something they shouldnt, then they all play together and they all get covered in it!
    backwoodsbelle backwoodsbelle
    22-25, F
    1 Response Mar 3, 2010

    My Pets.....

    I should post up pictures of them, it'd help, but I'll keep it short and sweet for now.  I should point out that I really haven't been home since August.  I miss my babies, but work sucks, and I've got a job to do.  Everyone except for Arnie was an adoption in one...
    ShaneC ShaneC
    26-30, M
    Jun 8, 2010


    My dog would say what the hell take me on a walk NOOOOOWWWW!!!!! Or please take me home
    deleted deleted
    Dec 24, 2009

    Cute Little Things

    I'm pretty sure my 2 gerbils would've asked me to spend more time with them. They had good food, toys, and a clean cage but that's it. I didn't hold them much because I was afraid of getting bit. I cared for them throughout their lives (they've died) but I feel guilty about not...
    Mia848 Mia848
    41-45, F
    Oct 7, 2013

    Sometimes I Do.

    I talk to my cat, alot. So it'd be awesome if he talked back, but it's nice to be able spill your feelings out and not be told your wrong, supid and/or insane.To have someone who listens without comment.Also imagine the amount of blackmail material he'd have.....
    MuffinMuffinGirl MuffinMuffinGirl
    13-15, F
    Jan 12, 2010

    Well, if the pet were a bird named Kismet,

    it'd likely say, "Call Bec! Call Bec!"
    Incommunicado1 Incommunicado1
    56-60, F
    Apr 25, 2014

    What They'd Say

    If rebel could talk he'd say, "give me mountains of food and I want you and all the other cats to be my slave. But give me my sapce. Rampage would say, "I am so happy and positive. I want to see the world and everything in it. I want a fulltime massuese that plays with...
    SummerWind18 SummerWind18
    26-30, F
    1 Response Jul 22, 2009
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