I Would Rather Hurt Than Feel Nothing At All

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 113 People

    Medicated.

    I've been prescribed medications for depression. They made me numb.I self-medicated with alcohol. It made me forget.Now I use nothing, and life pretty much sucks a lot of the time, but I plaster a smile on my face and go through the motions of being okay. No matter how much I...
    DopeyGirl DopeyGirl
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jan 8, 2010

    “ I Would Rather Hurt Than Feel Nothing At All”

        Words to a great song “I need you Now” by Lady Antelbella. it’s a great song, and I simply Love it. It says so much, about Love, and wanting someone, and needing someone so bad, that you are unsure if you can go on with out them...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Feb 21, 2010

    This Is My Addiction

    Numb is the enemy. It leaves open ends in the back of my mind that continuously unravel in stillness. I need something, ANYTHING to distract me from life, love, and the lack of those. From myself... even if it means pain. Pain isn't painful to someone who can't feel. It is...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Jan 24, 2010

    I Used To Say That.

    I used to say I would rather hurt than feel nothing at all, but now I would rather be numb than have feeling at all. Check out this group for online counselling. We are forming a group of unique counsellors. I hope you enjoy, and at least stop in! I Want To Offer Free Counselling...
    WhoisChaff WhoisChaff
    26-30
    1 Response Jan 1, 2012

    Hurt & Nada

    I felt hurt and I felt numb.  I was on both side.  I guess it is cause I have a good heart.
    Whateverrrrr Whateverrrrr
    36-40, F
    Aug 21, 2011

    Drugs

    i have a mental condition I know that. i know that going on drugs would help a lot. What I can't stand is how it makes you feel nothing at all. i would rather have the feelings I have than not knowing what I feel. i don't think we were intend to feel nothing, millions of people...
    Starbuck82 Starbuck82
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Mar 31, 2010

    I'm Not A Robot ...

    I had gone through that feeling of feel nothing at all ... I was hurted badly but I couldn't cry .. As if I was extremely shocked and I could feel nothing .. like a robot .. body worked but heart didn't .. Its so bad .. and took a while before I was recovered again ..
    DollyDiva DollyDiva
    26-30, F
    4 Responses Jan 9, 2010

    Functioning

    I was hurting.  Sore, aching.  Miserable.  My mind in a confusing whirl of thoughts and feelings.  In despair I spoke to a friend.  Said I was feeling bad, desperate.  "Well, be thankful that at least you can feel, as there are many people who can't...
    womaninbliss womaninbliss
    51-55, F
    5 Responses Jan 9, 2010

    Hell On Earth..

     I had always heard this saying....I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all..and in my naivite, I scoffed at it.  How could anything be worse than the excruciating torture of heartbreak??  Now, I know the true meaning of this phase, and it's unfortunate truth. ...
    lonesurvivor lonesurvivor
    56-60, F
    5 Responses Jan 9, 2010

    Related Experiences

    Farewell EP! Thank you for all the years of friendship and giving us a place to share and commiserate. <3
    xTenderHeartx xTenderHeartx
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Apr 21
    Just wanted to thank EP & all the wonderful friends I've made on here. EP thank you for creating a site where people could come to and express what they feel, for giving us all a...
    missingmyhubby missingmyhubby
    41-45, F
    Apr 21
    Thank you Ep for a great place to stay but now its time to go. Thank you to all the people I've met on here, let us meet again sometime! See you later, all of you...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Apr 20
    I honestly have no idea why I'm writing (typing, rather) this. I guess I just want to thank the people who have helped me in my time of need. And I'm grateful for the people who...
    wherehorizonsmeet wherehorizonsmeet
    18-21, F
    Apr 20
    Dear EP, I would I like to thank you for all the things you given to us,the opportunity to share our stories and thoughts... Till now I can't imagine and I can't admit that EP...
    foreverblue122 foreverblue122
    26-30, M
    Apr 20
    Goodbye ep family. Thank you for all the fun and weird memories on here. Because of ep I found my boyfriend, and I'm so lucky to have met him. I've also made some friends on here...
    osnapitzama osnapitzama
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Apr 20
    Ep was a fun place to be,and now we are losing this precious site.I would like to thank ep a lot for helping me meet people,helping me to make friendships that meant a lot to me...
    111rosy560 111rosy560
    13-15, F
    1 Response Apr 19
    Well if that's how you want to play it. I got in a fucktarded debate with somebody about how it's an injustice for political parties to expect tax payers to foot the bill for...
    ManifestoOfThePhoenix ManifestoOfThePhoenix
    26-30, M
    1 Response Apr 19
    it's my fault once again I gave in and I let them in. I thought sensed they we're different that for once somebody was not like the others I felt it. but..... I was wrong like the...
    SladeBolinLeaderofEp SladeBolinLeaderofEp
    18-21, M
    Apr 19
    my entire family won't talk to me because they don't like my significant other, who's in prison, that they've never met. won't answer their phones, nothing. tell me to drop dead...
    ammychristinee13 ammychristinee13
    18-21, F
    Apr 19
    Do I quit or toughen the **** up? I am a 22 year old college student. I got a job as a personal banker about a month ago. Before this, I worked as a cashier at a fast food place...
    harleyquinn16 harleyquinn16
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Apr 19
    I am no longer good enough for my boyfriend. I have gained alot of weight. He apparently loves everything about me but when it comes to time in bed and I am on top he becomes...
    SecretAbby SecretAbby
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Apr 18
    Please keep reading to the end, there's more to it than the title. Met a guy on the cruise I just got back from today. I can't stop thinking about him. He sorta showed interest...
    CrazyMetalPunk CrazyMetalPunk
    13-15, F
    Apr 18
    I just wanted to say thank you to all the people in my circle that helped me through a tough time, things have gotten better and I hope things are great for all of you too.
    Hanniemarie123 Hanniemarie123
    16-17, F
    Apr 17
    this song is made as campaign song ''stop abuse'' this is cover song,still beautiful in a differently way. i am also abuse survivor and this makes me cry and encouraged me always...
    genjiipiexx genjiipiexx
    31-35, F
    Apr 17
    There was this guy that I liked a lot. He was everything for me. He was the only reason I would get up in the morning and do something. I did everything he wanted me to do but...
    dontcallme2020 dontcallme2020
    16-17, F
    6 Responses Apr 17
    I haven't written anything since last year July/August but I find I should write one last post. I thank EP for what I have learnt and for giving me the chance to help others too...
    multiplexed multiplexed
    22-25, M
    Apr 17
    I don't really get it. Things had been going fine and then it was like a shadow crept over me and suddenly I was caught up in tough times that were previously only going on around...
    DanceOfBlades DanceOfBlades
    18-21, F
    Apr 17
    I’m sure by now those of you who remain are all well aware of the fact that our days here are numbered. On April 21 this place which we once were able to proudly call our home...
    HypoallergenicUnicorn HypoallergenicUnicorn
    13-15, F
    Apr 16
    I realized that. A few firefighters and I went to party and I realized how much I hated it. It wasn't for me. I threw up a lot, I couldn't think striaght. and if I GOT CAUGHT I was...
    DeterminedToMakeLifeWorthIt DeterminedToMakeLifeWorthIt
    18-21, F
    Apr 16
    there's a quote.. if you can't love me at my worst, then you can't have me at my best!
    yayepisoverimsad yayepisoverimsad
    22-25, F
    Apr 16
    We have been married 4 yrs together for 15 yrs. Our entire relationship is a roller coaster ride. Either really good or really bad. I have 3 children. One with my husband and 2...
    mimi1977 mimi1977
    36-40, F
    Apr 15
    Today was the first day i let all the feelings ive kept inside out and cried myself to sleep. its funny that i can be surrounded by so many people yet none of them can see how...
    natttdd natttdd
    22-25, F
    4 Responses Apr 15
    was a good thing that you always have a backup to speak about your problems & find some people who can understand how yoh feel & reassure you about it & also to make you feel...
    TurningPage2013 TurningPage2013
    26-30, F
    Apr 15
    the sphere is stretching fartheror am i getting smaller?the world spins forward until i can only spot a dotI’m covered in nacaram i deep the seaor outer space?he meant the...
    RoobieCatenis RoobieCatenis
    22-25, F
    1 Response Apr 14
    I wish I could go back it time. Specifically to being 14. This was when my parents moved me from the Seattle Bay Area (the cities on/near the Pudged Sound) to the Mississippi Gulf...
    nightlydemon nightlydemon
    22-25, F
    1 Response Apr 14
    I just wanted to thank EP and everyone on this site! After moving a couple of thousand miles to take care of my 90 y.o. parents who were in bad health( who have since passed away...
    Golondrinas Golondrinas
    56-60, M
    Apr 14
    We have become very familiar with EP. Whether aware or not, we have accepted it as a home/a playground, a scape from our realities. It became a refuge and a dumpster for things we...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Apr 14
    just cut my hand practicing my knife techniques. my knife was so sharp I just skinned the muscle and an hour later still don't feel pain
    Mike3569 Mike3569
    22-25, M
    1 Response Apr 14
    I feel like I have never been mentally here on Earth. Ever since I began to comprehend language and think critically I have never felt like I was meant to be on this Earth. This...
    MillennialStarSon MillennialStarSon
    18-21, M
    2 Responses Apr 14
    I trust. I feel. I love. Somewhere along the way I learn about doubts. Inconsistency and some discrepancy triggers it. Even the slightest simplest of things that don't add up can...
    soyyoprincesa soyyoprincesa
    22-25, F
    1 Response Apr 13
    People do this all the time. It is so disrespectful to say God's name in vain. I think it would be more appropriate to say 'gosh' or something other than God.
    AbigailBrooklyn AbigailBrooklyn
    13-15, F
    1 Response Apr 13
    My wife and I have been married for 14 years. We have a beautiful daughter who is about to be 12 years old. . We had our share of fights the last couple of years, some fights were...
    WhimsicalWill WhimsicalWill
    46-50, M
    1 Response Apr 13
    first of all...this is my Final Semester and it's not depressed or something..it's just painful moment just hit me. My childhood crush have a boyfriend..and i failed to tell her...
    IqbalStyles IqbalStyles
    18-21, M
    Apr 13
    This past few days have been rough. This isn't a short story, be aware. Over a year ago, my mother had been going through changes in her life. She was aging, and had not been...
    Wudugat Wudugat
    18-21, F
    1 Response Apr 13
    Sensitive people are the most genuine and honest people you will ever meet. There is nothing they won’t tell you about themselves if they trust your kindness. However, the moment...
    hazaramujahideen hazaramujahideen
    70+, F
    Apr 12
    I feel like the dream realm is where it's at. I go to sleep, and I dream. When I'm dreaming there's no pain. No heartbreak. No drama. No flaws. In my dreams, I'm perfect and happy...
    Heroprincess2207 Heroprincess2207
    13-15, F
    Apr 11
    So my husband is an alcoholic and we have a baby due in a couple months. He's on probation for several felony dui's. I went into a domestic violence shelter.. I'm still there. This...
    mortonseasalt mortonseasalt
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Apr 11
    First and foremost, I have been serious about my relationship with the Father since I was in my 20's....not to say, I haven't made some really bad choices (choices that a person...
    LetsShareStories LetsShareStories
    61-65, F
    4 Responses Apr 10
    My younger brother had one of his anger bursts again today when my mother was talking to him and said something that got onto his nerves. He's 22 and is tall and strong. When he...
    Letmebee Letmebee
    22-25, F
    10 Responses Apr 10
    It breaks my heart when I'm hurting and he doesn't do anything to make me feel better... like just a few hours i told him "let's eat" and he just said he's not hungry and didn't...
    DeathThrone DeathThrone
    22-25, F
    4 Responses Apr 10
    I am very lucky to know my dad, but our relationship has never really been more than a friendship. He and my mum split when I was around 6 and just remember not being that bothered...
    nedh1996 nedh1996
    18-21, M
    Apr 10
    Ever since I was a little kid, I dreamed about not being human. Not even being like a super hero or saving lives, but the fact that I was different and that it was something I...
    Iamwhatswrongwithme Iamwhatswrongwithme
    18-21, M
    Apr 9
    when it comes to love many don't realize what truly they where expressing. the ancient Greeks who came up with the discription for love would probably smite us with their lightning...
    Thesdamos Thesdamos
    16-17, M
    Apr 9
    It's hard not to. I'm split into so many parts. So many thoughts and emotions that feel like they shouldn't be mine. But it's more than that, no one sees the things I do in music...
    justbnatural justbnatural
    22-25, M
    1 Response Apr 8
    You see me like I'm right in front of you. You treat me like who's right in front of you. But that's not me. If any of you could relate, our conversations wouldn't be hollow. If...
    Taynkbot Taynkbot
    18-21, M
    Apr 8
    I was in love with a girl who I loved so much and she loved me madly.. An orphan who lost her mom and brother, but I came to fill that emptiness inside her heart. Two years...
    MessyGlaze MessyGlaze
    22-25, M
    1 Response Apr 8
    Fuc,k the liers who say they love you but they really don't Fuc,k the pretenders who'll make you believe when nothing true Fuc,k the maniacs who'll do everything to score Fuc,k...
    mysticalexis224 mysticalexis224
    22-25, F
    1 Response Apr 7
    Fuc,k the liers who say they love you but they really don't Fuc,k the pretenders who'll make you believe when nothing true Fuc,k the maniacs who'll do everything to score Fuc,k...
    mysticalexis224 mysticalexis224
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Apr 7
    Fuc,k the liers who say they love you but they really don't Fuc,k the pretenders who'll make you believe when nothing true Fuc,k the maniacs who'll do everything to score Fuc,k...
    mysticalexis224 mysticalexis224
    22-25, F
    4 Responses Apr 7
    Fuc,k the liers who say they love you but they really don't Fuc,k the pretenders who'll make you believe when nothing true Fuc,k the maniacs who'll do everything to score Fuc,k...
    mysticalexis224 mysticalexis224
    22-25, F
    4 Responses Apr 7
More Stories