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I Yell At Inanimate Objects

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 4,971 People

    I hold up my phone in public

    and rant at it about bad stuff that has happened that day. It makes me feel better and freaks out passes by.
    sroonaka616 sroonaka616 18-21 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    This is bad but yes, I cussed out my old

    computer, I tell my phone "I hope you die someday!" Then I say "I'm sorry I love you." I run into a door frame often so here's how it plays out I yell "You stupid ***** that hurt! Why do you hate me?!" I cuss out my hangers in my closet, they **** me off. I yell at wires , I...
    countrygirlISTaylor countrygirlISTaylor 16-17, F Jul 31, 2014

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    At least once a day I mumble curses at my

    computer at work. It may look like an inanimate object but I'm convinced it possesses an evil soul whose purpose for existence is to **** me off.
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M 5 Responses Mar 20

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    sometimes things just need to be put in their

    place...like technology...technology in general hates me
    lostfoundations lostfoundations 18-21, M Mar 20

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    This morning I went through 15 minutes of the

    most horrible stress of my life that crippled me to the point I was nearly on the kitchen floor balled up in the fetal position. Fuc&ing knot on the drawstring of my shorts...
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M 3 days ago

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    Damn Electrical Appliances!

    Yes, it is true. Electrical devices, furniture and kitchenware do have a personality, and problems can occur when it clashes with your own. Lets face, all of those devices are meant to be loyal and committed to your needs, so when they don't play nicely it is clearly their...
    wombatism wombatism 26-30, M 5 Responses Apr 25, 2008

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    When my computer doesn't work I yell stupid

    computer. Or let's say I stub my toe on a table leg, I will yell out loud at the table and say stupid table why did you have to go and jump out at me
    chrisp44 chrisp44 26-30, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Well, I yell a lot in general.

    I love to yell "YOU'RE LYING" or just stuff that I should be saying in a normal tone. It just naturally comes out. It's been like that my whole life. It's a trait I picked up from my mom and maternal grandfather. XD
    InvaderGashloog InvaderGashloog 70+, F 1 Response Nov 5, 2014

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    Being 50

    I decided that I ought to do something frivolous and puerile if I get to 50, and I’m not really into going to Prague with my non-existent mates and getting a prostitute, I can’t afford a sportscar or botox, and I’m not married so I can’t have an affair.  Instead I’ve...
    CrookedMan CrookedMan 46-50 1 Response May 19, 2012

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    I do. Be it my cellphone (when I had one),

    tv, computer, internet modem, or iPad. If the object doesn't functions the way it should, I'll yell at it because it's not doing its job. They were made to do a certain job, and if they don't then they deserve to be reprimanded. Another occasion in which I would yell at...
    ja131989 ja131989 22-25, F Dec 17, 2014

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    I yell at the other team

    when they are beating me in sports games just playfully tho lol.
    avo3 avo3 18-21, M 1 Response Jan 15

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    Lollipop948 Lollipop948 13-15, M 1 Response Jan 7

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    I cant resist it ! They mock me D:

    that damn smurf teddy mocking me :( its not a real smurf! Or the rug -_- yes the rug. Whenever anyone else walks over it, they are fine but when I walk over it, it trips me up. Tis an evil rug.
    TaintedSnowflakes TaintedSnowflakes 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 3, 2014

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    I just had a talk with myself in the balcony,

    beautifull actually, but I could never write it all, about whether I exist or not. I am not able to express any thoughts or feelings out loud properly, this for example, I would never say it, I know how it sounds like, totally aware of that. But i worries me. The person I am...
    Fkingphone Fkingphone 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 4

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    When I'm bored, I just start yelling at my

    exercise ball, and it usually wins the conversation.....•_^
    ayeitsjhoicx ayeitsjhoicx 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 15

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    WheatleyC0re WheatleyC0re 70+, M Nov 20, 2014

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    I once yelled at my car

    when I missed a turn!
    Emilia0659 Emilia0659 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 20, 2014

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    oddlyfunny oddlyfunny 26-30, F 3 Responses Mar 20

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    One time I yelled at a piece of popcorn

    for not landing in my mouth.
    HarleyMahLov HarleyMahLov 13-15, F 3 Responses Jan 9

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    I curse at things, usually my computer,

    sometimes hit it when it really pushes my buttons, although with any rage at an inanimate object the one that feels the best is giving them an aggressive middle finger. Amusing thing is, about a month ago I watched the outtakes from Hot Fuzz and Simon Pegg had trouble turning a...
    Lucienn Lucienn 22-25, T 2 Responses Aug 7, 2014

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    I learned so much about swearing by watching my

    dad fix the family car. To this day I can unleash a blistering stream of obscenity when working on a frustrating task that would make a sailor blush.
    rpf1988 rpf1988 41-45, M 1 day ago

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    I swear at and even threaten my laptop

    when it doesn't work the way I want it to. That doesn't make it work but it makes me feel better.
    yval711 yval711 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 4

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    objects just make me

    so mad and I'll never know the reason behind it because yes I yell at them yet I know it's not going to do otherwise
    briannabanana briannabanana 13-15, F Dec 21, 2014

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    Sometimes Its My Only Conversation For the Day.

    I love and name inanimate objects, and yes, I yell at them!  Sometimes I go a whole 24 hours without speaking a word to anyone, so I think the yelling helps.
    urbrandofheroin urbrandofheroin 22-25, F 5 Responses Apr 13, 2009

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    The toaster, the tv, my phone,

    door frames etc Aything that gets in my way lol
    Anth1290 Anth1290 22-25, M 3 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    Yelling Is Good For the Soul!

    Yelling at inanimate objects is something I find myself doing often in my rage during the times when I can't find my keys, wallet, phone, cigarettes, etc.  I've also yelled at God so often I'm sure he's really sick of it or just sits there saying 'yeah whatever just let it...
    Morfius Morfius 26-30, M 4 Responses Dec 14, 2008

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    ADrag ADrag 18-21 Feb 8, 2014

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    I Do But I Always Apologise to Them.

    Hello! I have a love hate relationship with my chain saw that I call Chromey. Sometimes Chromey won’t start and I have said some pretty hurtful things to it – like – “Where did you come from - Canadian Tire?” (that’s were all the cheep...
    Nanoose Nanoose 51-55, M 1 Response Apr 25, 2008

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    Lego and I have a hate-love relationship.

    The kid in me loves playing with it, but I want to MURDER when I step on in on my way to go pee.
    Bubblery Bubblery 22-25, F 3 Responses Feb 18

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    Yep... it happened just this morning,

    in fact. My coffee table stuck its foot out and tried to trip, managing to make me stub my big toe and causing me to turn and yell and curse at it loud enough for the neighbors to hear. Thank goodness they didn't call the police and we weren't charged with domestic disturbance...
    SunnyDayze SunnyDayze 22-25, F 8 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    I'm a seamstress lol

    so I slowly rub my machine and saying sssssshhhhh its ok :3
    becreative1308 becreative1308 22-25, F 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    I started yelling at my English paper.

    It had to be 8 pages front and back 😐
    Nightlover223 Nightlover223 13-15, F Nov 30, 2014

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    I mostly yell at my T.

    V. when I am doing horrible at a video game. I'll also yell at couches, beds, and tables, if they attack my toes.
    LittleStain LittleStain 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 18, 2014

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    I should say I yell at computers.

    My laptop is about 8 years old now and barely functions anymore but I don't feel like spending the money on a new one. It boots fast, but then the desktop just sits there, doing nothing. You can't open Start, you can't access the browser, you can't do anything. I'm always...
    Ticklemesilly5 Ticklemesilly5 31-35, F Nov 8, 2014

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    I talk to my iPhone in soothing tones

    when it's on the verge of freezing permanently. When that has no effect the screaming ensues.
    AriaKK AriaKK 18-21, F 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    Ridiculous

    But it really does help me feel better after they've pissed me off. Some of these things are lucky I haven't taken a hammer to them or run them over with my car (which rarely ****** me off, that awesome little car). I think about it, but I settle for yelling.
    itworkedintheory itworkedintheory 31-35 May 27, 2012

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    My Poor Pc

    If my PC could cry or punch me in the snout, it could and should.I've said it all.. !  !$%^^&&!!#%^&&*!  Glitches on EP makes me so irritated...  I need to send my computer flowers...sorry.....
    wiseowl wiseowl 61-65, F 2 Responses Jul 27, 2012

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    Stupid table! When did your corner get there?

    ?? And why would it run into me like that???
    ImActually18 ImActually18 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 20, 2014

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    Clearly, people like us.

    . We can't handle it when an object doesn't do what they are supposed to... I mean come on! We all know it's their fault!
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Feb 27, 2014

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    Lol. Stupid phone. Evil commercial.

    Dumb chair. Wait. Why list these.
    convertihd convertihd 46-50, M Mar 10

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    Absolutely I get pissed off at my possessions

    when they don't work the way they're supposed to so I yell at them.
    misternobrain misternobrain 22-25, M Jan 16, 2014

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    Related Experiences

    Does anybody else do crazy things like this?
    Ayunir Ayunir 22-25, M 2 Responses Mar 23

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    If you yell at me I am either get really angry and yell at you and been told when I do I am very intimidating or I am gonna totally ignore you and walk away . I hate being yelled...
    nakednudist nakednudist 46-50, M 1 Response Apr 6

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    I can't yell at anybody, its like a curse.. if i even attempt to raise my voice in a fight with my family, friends, (not really) teachers.. I will cry, I dont know why either...
    MyLostProperty MyLostProperty 16-17, M Mar 19

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    Thanks for bringing back memories of yellow rubber raincoats..where have they gone ..now kids don't seem to wear raincoats.i loved the helmet style rain hats..when you put one of...
    Etarmasol Etarmasol 61-65, M 2 Responses Mar 21

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