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I Yell At Inanimate Objects

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 6,053 People

    I'm a seamstress lol

    so I slowly rub my machine and saying sssssshhhhh its ok :3
    becreative1308 becreative1308 22-25, F 4 Responses Apr 16

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    WheatleyC0re WheatleyC0re 70+, M Nov 20, 2014

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    I yell at the other team

    when they are beating me in sports games just playfully tho lol.
    avo3 avo3 18-21, M 1 Response Jan 15

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    I learned so much about swearing by watching my

    dad fix the family car. To this day I can unleash a blistering stream of obscenity when working on a frustrating task that would make a sailor blush.
    rpf1988 rpf1988 41-45, M Apr 16

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    Damn Electrical Appliances!

    Yes, it is true. Electrical devices, furniture and kitchenware do have a personality, and problems can occur when it clashes with your own. Lets face, all of those devices are meant to be loyal and committed to your needs, so when they don't play nicely it is clearly their...
    wombatism wombatism 26-30, M 5 Responses Apr 25, 2008

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    oddlyfunny oddlyfunny 26-30, F 3 Responses Mar 20

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    My Poor Pc

    If my PC could cry or punch me in the snout, it could and should.I've said it all.. !  !$%^^&&!!#%^&&*!  Glitches on EP makes me so irritated...  I need to send my computer flowers...sorry.....
    wiseowl wiseowl 61-65, F 2 Responses Jul 27, 2012

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    Well, I yell a lot in general.

    I love to yell "YOU'RE LYING" or just stuff that I should be saying in a normal tone. It just naturally comes out. It's been like that my whole life. It's a trait I picked up from my mom and maternal grandfather. XD
    InvaderGashloog InvaderGashloog 70+, F 1 Response Nov 5, 2014

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    Lollipop948 Lollipop948 13-15, M 1 Response Jan 7

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    Being 50

    I decided that I ought to do something frivolous and puerile if I get to 50, and I’m not really into going to Prague with my non-existent mates and getting a prostitute, I can’t afford a sportscar or botox, and I’m not married so I can’t have an affair.  Instead I’ve...
    CrookedMan CrookedMan 46-50 1 Response May 19, 2012

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    At least once a day I mumble curses at my

    computer at work. It may look like an inanimate object but I'm convinced it possesses an evil soul whose purpose for existence is to **** me off.
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M 4 Responses Mar 20

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    The toaster, the tv, my phone,

    door frames etc Aything that gets in my way lol
    Anth1290 Anth1290 22-25, M 3 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    Fishing on the ocean.

    You can't help but freak out once in awhile when waves toss you from wall to wall while you try to put boots on or a cabinet drawer smacks you in the head. Work is already hard, Ocean, we know you're self-aware and fully conscious of the misery you inflict.
    checkle1 checkle1 26-30, M Apr 18

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    I was walking into my room carrying a bowl of

    popcorn (to watch Pokemon Heros the movie lol and having a really bad day), I dropped my popcorn all over my floor and I screamed "füčk you to my fine feathered friend"
    bingbongtingtongg bingbongtingtongg 18-21, F 1 Response May 8

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    When you buy a phone case

    for your new phone and you end up dropping it the next day and the phone breaks, Your just standing there like why did I even bother -_-
    xRayYx xRayYx 18-21, M 1 Response May 19

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    Ridiculous

    But it really does help me feel better after they've pissed me off. Some of these things are lucky I haven't taken a hammer to them or run them over with my car (which rarely ****** me off, that awesome little car). I think about it, but I settle for yelling.
    itworkedintheory itworkedintheory 31-35 May 27, 2012

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    One time I yelled at a piece of popcorn

    for not landing in my mouth.
    HarleyMahLov HarleyMahLov 13-15, F 3 Responses Jan 9

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    Stupid table! When did your corner get there?

    ?? And why would it run into me like that???
    ImActually18 ImActually18 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 20, 2014

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    Sometimes Its My Only Conversation For the Day.

    I love and name inanimate objects, and yes, I yell at them!  Sometimes I go a whole 24 hours without speaking a word to anyone, so I think the yelling helps.
    urbrandofheroin urbrandofheroin 22-25, F 5 Responses Apr 13, 2009

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    Lego and I have a hate-love relationship.

    The kid in me loves playing with it, but I want to MURDER when I step on in on my way to go pee.
    Bubblery Bubblery 22-25, F 3 Responses Feb 18

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    ADrag ADrag 18-21 Feb 8, 2014

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    Lol. Stupid phone. Evil commercial.

    Dumb chair. Wait. Why list these.
    convertihd convertihd 46-50, M Mar 10

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    Yelling Is Good For the Soul!

    Yelling at inanimate objects is something I find myself doing often in my rage during the times when I can't find my keys, wallet, phone, cigarettes, etc.  I've also yelled at God so often I'm sure he's really sick of it or just sits there saying 'yeah whatever just let it...
    Morfius Morfius 26-30, M 4 Responses Dec 14, 2008

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    I mostly yell at my T.

    V. when I am doing horrible at a video game. I'll also yell at couches, beds, and tables, if they attack my toes.
    LittleStain LittleStain 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 18, 2014

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    This morning I went through 15 minutes of the

    most horrible stress of my life that crippled me to the point I was nearly on the kitchen floor balled up in the fetal position. Fuc&ing knot on the drawstring of my shorts...
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M Apr 15

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    I tend to hold in irritation

    and anger until I explode. That's when I break stuff (and yell at them :p). Most recently I almost broke my laptop. I have also broke tv's, remote controls and phones....
    lindamerja lindamerja 26-30, F 1 Response May 7

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    18riveta 18riveta 13-15, M 1 Response May 16

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    I cant resist it ! They mock me D:

    that damn smurf teddy mocking me :( its not a real smurf! Or the rug -_- yes the rug. Whenever anyone else walks over it, they are fine but when I walk over it, it trips me up. Tis an evil rug.
    TaintedSnowflakes TaintedSnowflakes 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 3, 2014

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    Clearly, people like us.

    . We can't handle it when an object doesn't do what they are supposed to... I mean come on! We all know it's their fault!
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Feb 27, 2014

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    objects just make me

    so mad and I'll never know the reason behind it because yes I yell at them yet I know it's not going to do otherwise
    briannabanana briannabanana 13-15, F Dec 21, 2014

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    I once yelled at my car

    when I missed a turn!
    Emilia0659 Emilia0659 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 20, 2014

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    I swear to god, if I run into the bed frame one

    more time, I'm gonna lose it. I now have two bruised bumps on my right leg, and my advice d or It to stop being so sharp isn't working. Yelling might be in order.
    Ginkofishin Ginkofishin 18-21, F 4 Responses May 4

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    I just had a talk with myself in the balcony,

    beautifull actually, but I could never write it all, about whether I exist or not. I am not able to express any thoughts or feelings out loud properly, this for example, I would never say it, I know how it sounds like, totally aware of that. But i worries me. The person I am...
    Fkingphone Fkingphone 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 4

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    Yep... it happened just this morning,

    in fact. My coffee table stuck its foot out and tried to trip, managing to make me stub my big toe and causing me to turn and yell and curse at it loud enough for the neighbors to hear. Thank goodness they didn't call the police and we weren't charged with domestic disturbance...
    SunnyDayze SunnyDayze 22-25, F 8 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    I swear at and even threaten my laptop

    when it doesn't work the way I want it to. That doesn't make it work but it makes me feel better.
    yval711 yval711 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 4

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    I cussed out my work laptop,

    calling it the c word because I couldn't call the sales person that.
    marlett marlett 41-45, F 1 Response May 9

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    I had to cover the Tupperware container of

    cookies, because they wouldn't stop calling my name.....I gave in and ate 4.
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Apr 28

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    It can be anything, my phone,

    my laptop, table legs and shelves. The other night I foolishly turned out the light before leaving a room, so I had to find my way out in the dark. I walked slap bang into a cabinet and grazed my hip, I let out a squeal before screaming bloody murder at the poor defenceless...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Apr 25

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    When I'm bored, I just start yelling at my

    exercise ball, and it usually wins the conversation.....•_^
    ayeitsjhoicx ayeitsjhoicx 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 15

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    hi I'm Ashley and....

    (sigh) and I yell at inanimate objects :/ (in my defence they start it) my last victims was a rack it ran over the back of my ankle ^.^ little bi**h
    becreative1308 becreative1308 22-25, F 2 Responses Apr 18

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    I can get violent with inanimate objects too.

    I once stubbed my toe on a chair. I kicked the chair... Boy was that a mistake.
    pardax pardax 13-15, M May 2

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    I hold up my phone in public

    and rant at it about bad stuff that has happened that day. It makes me feel better and freaks out passes by.
    sroonaka616 sroonaka616 18-21 2 Responses Apr 15

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    I talk to my iPhone in soothing tones

    when it's on the verge of freezing permanently. When that has no effect the screaming ensues.
    AriaKK AriaKK 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 15

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    Absolutely I get pissed off at my possessions

    when they don't work the way they're supposed to so I yell at them.
    misternobrain misternobrain 22-25, M Jan 16, 2014

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    sometimes things just need to be put in their

    place...like technology...technology in general hates me
    lostfoundations lostfoundations 18-21, M Mar 20

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    Related Experiences

    ...amongst other inanimate objects; phone, tablet, microwave, alarm clock, my printer... especially my printer >:(
    GracefulNovaa GracefulNovaa 26-30, F May 1

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