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I Yell At Inanimate Objects

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 5,143 People

    Ridiculous

    But it really does help me feel better after they've pissed me off. Some of these things are lucky I haven't taken a hammer to them or run them over with my car (which rarely ****** me off, that awesome little car). I think about it, but I settle for yelling.
    itworkedintheory itworkedintheory 31-35 May 27, 2012

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    Lego and I have a hate-love relationship.

    The kid in me loves playing with it, but I want to MURDER when I step on in on my way to go pee.
    Bubblery Bubblery 22-25, F 3 Responses Feb 18

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    It can be anything, my phone,

    my laptop, table legs and shelves. The other night I foolishly turned out the light before leaving a room, so I had to find my way out in the dark. I walked slap bang into a cabinet and grazed my hip, I let out a squeal before screaming bloody murder at the poor defenceless...
    AngelicDarkness AngelicDarkness 18-21, F 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    Being 50

    I decided that I ought to do something frivolous and puerile if I get to 50, and I’m not really into going to Prague with my non-existent mates and getting a prostitute, I can’t afford a sportscar or botox, and I’m not married so I can’t have an affair.  Instead I’ve...
    CrookedMan CrookedMan 46-50 1 Response May 19, 2012

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    One time I yelled at a piece of popcorn

    for not landing in my mouth.
    HarleyMahLov HarleyMahLov 13-15, F 3 Responses Jan 9

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    Yelling Is Good For the Soul!

    Yelling at inanimate objects is something I find myself doing often in my rage during the times when I can't find my keys, wallet, phone, cigarettes, etc.  I've also yelled at God so often I'm sure he's really sick of it or just sits there saying 'yeah whatever just let it...
    Morfius Morfius 26-30, M 4 Responses Dec 14, 2008

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    At least once a day I mumble curses at my

    computer at work. It may look like an inanimate object but I'm convinced it possesses an evil soul whose purpose for existence is to **** me off.
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M 5 Responses Mar 20

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    Fishing on the ocean.

    You can't help but freak out once in awhile when waves toss you from wall to wall while you try to put boots on or a cabinet drawer smacks you in the head. Work is already hard, Ocean, we know you're self-aware and fully conscious of the misery you inflict.
    checkle1 checkle1 26-30, M 6 days ago

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    I yell at the other team

    when they are beating me in sports games just playfully tho lol.
    avo3 avo3 18-21, M 1 Response Jan 15

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    I cant resist it ! They mock me D:

    that damn smurf teddy mocking me :( its not a real smurf! Or the rug -_- yes the rug. Whenever anyone else walks over it, they are fine but when I walk over it, it trips me up. Tis an evil rug.
    TaintedSnowflakes TaintedSnowflakes 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 3, 2014

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    Stupid table! When did your corner get there?

    ?? And why would it run into me like that???
    ImActually18 ImActually18 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 20, 2014

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    I talk to my iPhone in soothing tones

    when it's on the verge of freezing permanently. When that has no effect the screaming ensues.
    AriaKK AriaKK 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 15

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    I learned so much about swearing by watching my

    dad fix the family car. To this day I can unleash a blistering stream of obscenity when working on a frustrating task that would make a sailor blush.
    rpf1988 rpf1988 41-45, M Apr 16

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    I do. Be it my cellphone (when I had one),

    tv, computer, internet modem, or iPad. If the object doesn't functions the way it should, I'll yell at it because it's not doing its job. They were made to do a certain job, and if they don't then they deserve to be reprimanded. Another occasion in which I would yell at...
    ja131989 ja131989 22-25, F Dec 17, 2014

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    objects just make me

    so mad and I'll never know the reason behind it because yes I yell at them yet I know it's not going to do otherwise
    briannabanana briannabanana 13-15, F Dec 21, 2014

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    WheatleyC0re WheatleyC0re 70+, M Nov 20, 2014

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    I'm a seamstress lol

    so I slowly rub my machine and saying sssssshhhhh its ok :3
    becreative1308 becreative1308 22-25, F 4 Responses Apr 16

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    I hold up my phone in public

    and rant at it about bad stuff that has happened that day. It makes me feel better and freaks out passes by.
    sroonaka616 sroonaka616 18-21 2 Responses Apr 15

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    Damn Electrical Appliances!

    Yes, it is true. Electrical devices, furniture and kitchenware do have a personality, and problems can occur when it clashes with your own. Lets face, all of those devices are meant to be loyal and committed to your needs, so when they don't play nicely it is clearly their...
    wombatism wombatism 26-30, M 5 Responses Apr 25, 2008

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    I started yelling at my English paper.

    It had to be 8 pages front and back 😐
    Nightlover223 Nightlover223 13-15, F Nov 30, 2014

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    Whenever the Internet dies I get annoyed at

    whatever device I'm on. FFS is pretty common:)
    TheGrumpyDead TheGrumpyDead 31-35, M 5 hrs ago

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    I should say I yell at computers.

    My laptop is about 8 years old now and barely functions anymore but I don't feel like spending the money on a new one. It boots fast, but then the desktop just sits there, doing nothing. You can't open Start, you can't access the browser, you can't do anything. I'm always...
    Ticklemesilly5 Ticklemesilly5 31-35, F Nov 8, 2014

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    I just had a talk with myself in the balcony,

    beautifull actually, but I could never write it all, about whether I exist or not. I am not able to express any thoughts or feelings out loud properly, this for example, I would never say it, I know how it sounds like, totally aware of that. But i worries me. The person I am...
    Fkingphone Fkingphone 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 4

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    Lollipop948 Lollipop948 13-15, M 1 Response Jan 7

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    oddlyfunny oddlyfunny 26-30, F 3 Responses Mar 20

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    Absolutely I get pissed off at my possessions

    when they don't work the way they're supposed to so I yell at them.
    misternobrain misternobrain 22-25, M Jan 16, 2014

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    When I'm bored, I just start yelling at my

    exercise ball, and it usually wins the conversation.....•_^
    ayeitsjhoicx ayeitsjhoicx 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 15

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    Sometimes Its My Only Conversation For the Day.

    I love and name inanimate objects, and yes, I yell at them!  Sometimes I go a whole 24 hours without speaking a word to anyone, so I think the yelling helps.
    urbrandofheroin urbrandofheroin 22-25, F 5 Responses Apr 13, 2009

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    Well, I yell a lot in general.

    I love to yell "YOU'RE LYING" or just stuff that I should be saying in a normal tone. It just naturally comes out. It's been like that my whole life. It's a trait I picked up from my mom and maternal grandfather. XD
    InvaderGashloog InvaderGashloog 70+, F 1 Response Nov 5, 2014

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    ADrag ADrag 18-21 Feb 8, 2014

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    The toaster, the tv, my phone,

    door frames etc Aything that gets in my way lol
    Anth1290 Anth1290 22-25, M 3 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    Yep... it happened just this morning,

    in fact. My coffee table stuck its foot out and tried to trip, managing to make me stub my big toe and causing me to turn and yell and curse at it loud enough for the neighbors to hear. Thank goodness they didn't call the police and we weren't charged with domestic disturbance...
    SunnyDayze SunnyDayze 22-25, F 8 Responses Sep 10, 2014

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    Lol. Stupid phone. Evil commercial.

    Dumb chair. Wait. Why list these.
    convertihd convertihd 46-50, M Mar 10

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    I mostly yell at my T.

    V. when I am doing horrible at a video game. I'll also yell at couches, beds, and tables, if they attack my toes.
    LittleStain LittleStain 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 18, 2014

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    My Poor Pc

    If my PC could cry or punch me in the snout, it could and should.I've said it all.. !  !$%^^&&!!#%^&&*!  Glitches on EP makes me so irritated...  I need to send my computer flowers...sorry.....
    wiseowl wiseowl 61-65, F 2 Responses Jul 27, 2012

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    sometimes things just need to be put in their

    place...like technology...technology in general hates me
    lostfoundations lostfoundations 18-21, M Mar 20

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    I once yelled at my car

    when I missed a turn!
    Emilia0659 Emilia0659 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 20, 2014

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    Clearly, people like us.

    . We can't handle it when an object doesn't do what they are supposed to... I mean come on! We all know it's their fault!
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Feb 27, 2014

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    This morning I went through 15 minutes of the

    most horrible stress of my life that crippled me to the point I was nearly on the kitchen floor balled up in the fetal position. Fuc&ing knot on the drawstring of my shorts...
    Bumblelion Bumblelion 31-35, M Apr 15

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    hi I'm Ashley and....

    (sigh) and I yell at inanimate objects :/ (in my defence they start it) my last victims was a rack it ran over the back of my ankle ^.^ little bi**h
    becreative1308 becreative1308 22-25, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    I swear at and even threaten my laptop

    when it doesn't work the way I want it to. That doesn't make it work but it makes me feel better.
    yval711 yval711 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 4

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    Related Experiences

    If you yell at me I am either get really angry and yell at you and been told when I do I am very intimidating or I am gonna totally ignore you and walk away . I hate being yelled...
    nakednudist nakednudist 46-50, M 1 Response Apr 6

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    Don't get me wrong, I love my dad with all of my heart but he doesn't ever know how I feel and I'm afraid he's gonna yell at me if I do. He always comes in my room and opens my...
    maddie91101 maddie91101 13-15, F 4 Responses Apr 6

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    When someone yells at me I usually get angry or I want to cry. Most of the time I get angry though.
    Cherilyn16 Cherilyn16 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 30

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    When I was watching the voice I yelled at the coaches to turn around lol
    PikachuIsPikachu PikachuIsPikachu 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 31

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    When I get yelled at, especially when I haven't done anything wrong, I feel so small, I just want to disappear. It always makes me want to cry.
    Letmebee Letmebee 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 2