Confessions from Louisiana (LA)

OMG I Am so sick and tired of my husband treating me like I am a piece of dirt, since he has openly accused me (recently) of cheating on him over 1yr ago with get this my best friend and her husband at a party I went to while my husband was in jail. I DID NOT CHEAT ON HIM !!!!!! but he says there is no proof to say otherwise so I am supposed to allow him to act how ever he pleases. I wish I knew how to gain back trust that I am not sure how was lost in the first place.

About two years ago when I was 19, my Dad fell off of his big-rig and did some major damage. He is disabled and unable to work, or do much of anything without great pain. When it first happened, he became really depressed. My mom started basic training, and later went to paramedic school, so I moved back home and basically became the mom of the household. I cooked, cleaned, took care of Dad, my sister, and my grandmother as well as went to school and work. I gave up alot to help my family. Things have leveled out alot, but my sister, now 16, has grown so used to me taking care of everything, she feels she can just abuse me and expect my help when she needs it. Sad thing is, she has a point. No matter how much she hurts me, I don't have the heart to turn her away.

Example: If she she's me within the first hour after waking up, she says something critical about me. I'm not good enough at this, or I don't do that, or I do this. Yet, when she forgot Father's day, she called me in a panic and asked me to pick something up for her. I had anticipated this and got a combined gift of 2 video games and a card from each of us. My stipulation was that she paid half, and the games were a combined gift. It cost me $60, and I only asked her to pay $20. When we gave him the gifts, she tried to take credit for the more expensive game. I just today got the one-third I asked her for, and that was after weeks of her asking "Are you so low on money that you need it?" and basically comming up with excuses as to why she couldn't stop by an ATM machine.

Another example: Tonight she was saying how she was going to warn a supervisor, the one who writes her check, about another supervisor. My sister is quitting, and she's getting a doctor's excuse, so she will still get her bonus check. I warned her that I wouldn't trust telling someone I had a beef with someone while trying to leave with bonus in tact, and she bit my head off rather viciously about how I didn't know her supervisor and I had no right to tell her what she could and couldn't tell her.

I'm just tired of this treatment, and I don't know what to do. And now, with the economy the way it is, it's getting harder and harder to get in a position to move back out on my own again.

My dad can be just as bad. Right after she snapped, I was sitting on the couch trying to compose myself. My dad wanted to say something about the event. I literally asked him politely "Dad, I'm trying to compose myself. Could I please have a minute so I don't start crying?" He swore, tensing up and yelling about how rude it was to try to shut him up and how he was going to say what he had to say. My counselor tells me I need to be more vocal with what I need, but how can I when this is the result?

I've been five years in the same high school were I've seen every kind of bullying, usually against younger kids. The worst bullying happends off school grounds, where no one can see what's happening. The worst I ever witnessed happed behind a brick wall by the railroad tracks. They were threatening so beat him up if he din't take his clothes off and kicked him a few time to let him know they meat it. I was there with some other girls, most of them scream out to take it all off. He was so scared and intimidated, that he took it all off and stood there in nothing but his socks. It even embarrassed me to see him bieng laughed at and girls having fun checking him out. He looked so humiliated and embarrassed standing there, that just thinking what was going threw his mind, even got me embarrassed. If it was me standing naked with boys looking at me, I wouldn't  have dared show my face again in school.