Am I an idiot to have put up with no sex for 9 years from my husband? Why do I think every tomorrow will be the day?
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25 Answers to "Am I an idiot to have put up with no sex for 9 years from my husband? Why do I think every tomorrow will be the day?"
Posted by Spitbak Jul 23rd, 2011 at 7:55PM
When sleeping,handcuff him to the bed and do your thing,honey!!!
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Posted by meerin Jul 24th, 2011 at 12:24AM
It's easier to keep hoping that something-anything!-will change them. I think you should look at what you want from life and ask yourself if you can realistically get this while in your marriage. Come by and make a post in the Sexless Marriage group. You will get a lot more understanding there.
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Posted by Pagan1 Jul 23rd, 2011 at 8:37PM
I'd be honored...
To discretely service ;p> your Cooch!
Like (3)
Posted by BamPow Jul 23rd, 2011 at 7:30PM
In words of the great philosopher Keanu Reeves......"Whoa"
That is an incredibly long time to go without sex. I would hope you have brought up the idea of some sort of couples counseling or anything else you can think of the open up the lines of communication. Part of his vows probably included some thing like "to have and to hold", and if he hasn't touched you in nine years, he's not keeping up that end of the bargain. The bottom line is that you two need to talk, and you need to let him know how serious you are about this.
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Posted by david4u Jul 27th, 2011 at 3:48PM
any reason why he does not want to have sex
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Posted by ts669204 Jul 27th, 2011 at 2:55PM
that is a long time. its normal for a month or so but i think that there is something going on. im not saying as far as cheating but maybe your husband is gong through something and just isnt able too but even so i would totally look into it. nine years is way too long. find out whats going on. and hoping isnt gonna do anything. but destroy your confidence. if hes not into you or if there is someone else you need to move on but if its medical support him and let him know that you are there for him. not sure on what else to say
Like (2)
Posted by ThatFeeling Jul 25th, 2011 at 10:05AM
How will you answer your question in 10 years.... 12.... 15?
Tomorrow never comes.
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Posted by 4ME60 Jul 25th, 2011 at 7:09AM
NO, you are NOT an idiot for putting up with it. Like most of us in the ILIASM group, you got married to someone who you wanted to stay with. Why do you think every tomorrow will be the day? Well, we all seem to be infected with the disease of FALSE HOPE. Don't get me wrong, hope is great when there IS hope, but when there isn't any, some of us - myself included - cling to false hope to avoid making painful changes to our lives. Read many stories in the group, post your own, and you'll start to see things about yourself and your relationship that you couldn't see before. Wishing you much strength and sending hugs!
Like (2)
Posted by betancourthdulce Jul 24th, 2011 at 12:04PM
you are not an idiot but have become a pure woman. Because not haveing sex for nine years makes you clean.you could have look for sex some where else but u did not that make you a clean and good woman.
NO MAN IS WORTHY OF YOU!
Like (2)
Posted by brkfarmer Jul 24th, 2011 at 12:51AM
I have the same with my wife and am always thinking tommorow she will change .we have been together for 31 years and up till the last 6or7 years she would put out but then she crossed her legs on me and I am starving for sex.
Like (2)
Posted by stlmo8 Jul 24th, 2011 at 12:01AM
True... you don't say if he's simply (apparently) unWILLING or unABLE to have sex with you. Have you discussed this with him? Have the two of you ever gotten counseling?
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Reply by PrincessMore Dec 30th, 2011 at 12:26AM
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Reply by stlmo8 Dec 30th, 2011 at 11:19PM
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Posted by BennDover Jul 23rd, 2011 at 7:25PM
No sex for 9 yrs almost makes you a virgin
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Posted by chimpou Oct 30th, 2012 at 10:33PM
You sex-starved trollop you!
Like (1)
Posted by Mazda350zx Jul 26th, 2012 at 1:34AM
Having no sex for 9 years is totally unacceptable. He has no feelings for your emotions or needs. If you have had no sex in a relationship for more than six months you are in trouble and need professional help. If he is unwilling or not interested in improving the relationship, I am sorry but it is time to move on as fast as you can. There is light at the end of the tunnel and sexual satisfaction to be had, but do not wait too long as you only have one life and you are the one making the choices.
Like (1)
Posted by dragonflyinme Feb 27th, 2012 at 10:08AM
You do have many options but are you open to them? Wish you the very best.
Being sexual ia a normal feeling, you nbeed to express yourself even if it is in private with another...;)
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Posted by lnnl Jan 20th, 2012 at 10:55PM
If you love him no. If you're staying with him because of kids no. You're only an idiot if you haven't gotten anything on the side. 8-)
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Posted by PrincessMore Dec 30th, 2011 at 12:26AM
As other folks from ILIASM have answered, I'll just add to the chorus. The I Live In A Sexless Marriage group is not a fantasy group. It is filled with thousands of others who have lived with this pain. There are many regular posters, some who are still in a sexless marriage, and a few lucky souls who have escaped. There's real help for *you* to be had in ILIASM but don't expect to find a magic answer.
Princess OneOfTheLuckyFew
Like (1)
Posted by memphomaniac Dec 29th, 2011 at 10:32PM
He may have some problem with his equipment that he is to embarrassed about to tell you
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Reply by PrincessMore Dec 30th, 2011 at 12:24AM
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Posted by TheGirlNextDoorToYou Dec 29th, 2011 at 1:22PM
to be honest, i'd say leave him but its easier said than done so forget that. it seems to me that you LOVE your huusband and if anything, he's the idiot. i agree with the person who posted that there might be something going on with him that he's just embarrased to tell you but one thing i know is marriage is forever so sit him down and ask him why he's denying a sexual relationship and wait till you get an honest answer. gather the courage and go get your man! x
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Posted by prettybirdz Nov 2nd, 2011 at 2:23PM
Because we are comfortable people pleases and don't want to hurt them.... Tomorrow is the same.....Next week is the same.....Next month is the same....We have created our own prison my friend.
I would be able to identify his **** in a line up thats how long its been for me !!
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Reply by prettybirdz Nov 2nd, 2011 at 2:24PM
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Reply by gypsyblu Jan 1st, 2012 at 7:09PM
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