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sadafteralltheseyears sadafteralltheseyears 36-40, F 40 Answers Aug 16, 2012 in Marriage

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Honey, it's not you. Men just like to look at nude women. Doesn't really even matter if they're attracted to them or not.

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And women just want to feel attractive, so if we aren't getting that from the man who is supposed to love us, what is to keep us from seeking it elsewhere?

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Amen!

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Nothing is stopping you.

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You are a very beautiful women... never let no man lower you self a stem and no your not the only one.

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Probably not the only one, but you shouldn't feel that way, as he apparently is only "Looking"!

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Doesn't matter. "Looking" is disrespectful to a wife. It hurts us and makes us feel like we aren't good enough.

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Why is it disrespectful? Why does it make you feel not good enough? Also, not good enough for what?

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That's just rude and disrespectful, seriously

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It goes both ways. I don't look at that garbage, and never intend to. I would hope any woman I date would be the same. There is **** for women after all.

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That is quite understandable. Especially if you are otherwise enticing to him.<br />
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But, men are more direct and visual, and men, too, can feel undesirable by their spouse's behavior or apparent lack of interest in them.

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I try to look good every single day for my man. I dress in various ways, and he still looks.

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His loss. I enjoy looking at my wife, and on a narrow trail, while hiking or skiing she sets the pace and I enjoy the view. Alas, I wish she enjoyed looking at me in that way.

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yes

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No, you certainly are not the only woman who feels this way. A lot of women are afraid to speak up about it to their husbands, because it is a "guy thing" and "guys just do it" . Bull! Your husband should keep his visual exploits for you and only you.

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My point exactly!!!!!
He is there for you! He should be the one protecting your feelings not degrading them for random women! You should mean more than them!

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If both people in the relationship are doing what they need to, there should be no need for it. Maybe you should tell him how it makes you feel.

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I can understand being upset, but then he probably does find you attractive. I think guys look at **** as something of a routine. You know, "Get home from work, fire up the PC, jerk off to ****, go about my day."<br />
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Obviously, it would be nice if my significant other never looked at women in magazines or watched **** on the internet, but come on, I can't compete with photoshop and plastic surgery. Guys know **** is fake, they just need something nice to look at while they jerk. Any guy who thinks that **** is real is in for a huge shock when they loose their V-card.

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First I am a man,<br />
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I think its facetious to assume your husband looks at *********** (I must assume this by the desc<x>ription) because he doesn't find you attractive (though i is possible, I don't know him). I personally look at *********** because I'm left sexually unsatisfied by my wife and have no other recourse, though I am wholeheartedly attracted to her.

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Isn't saying "I feel unsatisfied by you" just as insulting, even if you add "But I still find you hot"? How would you feel if she said that about you.

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I know what what weapon33 is trying to say. Anger and resentment due to lack of understanding of both person's needs and feelings is not the answer.

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What I mean by that is that regardless of whatever the issue is - we do not have sex, or have it very infrequently. Despite an otherwise sublime relationship. My attraction or devotion does not wane. But I am relegated to the position and do not feel she should be made to feel less attractive because of it.

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and if it is not for sexual gratification, just because....then might i have cause to feel hurt and unattractive????

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If these other issues can be considered resolved: Then yes you should be greatly offended. I see no reason he would not be enamored by you.

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2 More Responses

I think, if you're a close pair, that there's no problem with being open with your partner and just looking.... If he feels comfortable enough to look in front of you, then you have no worries at all.... If there's anything to hide from you, then he's not being allowed to be himself.... I for one think that women who force their partners to hide stuff that's harmless, are potentially setting themselves up for more secrets. Enjoy his honesty.

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I thought we were very close, but this is always hidden and discovered by accident.

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Harmless? To who?

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All guys I know will look at nude or half nude women.... really..... no matter if married or not... I mean.. I think most guys are dawgs..... really... dawgs... in one way or another.... the most important thing is that he is still turned on by you when you are together....<br />
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I just think he is being... insensitive to ur feelings... tell him how you feel... see if he changes his attitude.. if he cares.. he will make effort to stop looking.... the important thing is making that effort.

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No you are not the only one

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Hi SadAfter . . . chuckling . . . check back with me . . . but after two weeks here . . . your husband will be jealous of all the offers you are receiving . . . now THAT will change the paradigm! . . . . but I must ask . .. what are you going to do with all the offers?

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LOL! I'm just here for friendly interaction.

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did they have big boobies??

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I think he is more of a butt man from what I have seen. LOL!

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I would kike to look at you naked.

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What in the world? Is that man blind?!?!

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Have you been nude at the same time so he could choose to look at you? If not, why not try it once.

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No, i feel the same way. And it hurts me more when i tell him about it and he yells back at me saying that I trip

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