Resolved Question

I have had several long distance relationships. I have met several also, all I can say is that there is some kind of lonliness people who chat online posess. It is comforting to find someone nice to talk to. It feels so good and is soothing to the soul, even brightens up your day. However beware you may ruin it if you actually meet, not always but you need to prepare yourselfe for that chance. The problem is that you have talked online for so long and so intimatley you are somewhat jaded. If you go to meet someone I would recommend not going with the intentions of staying or letting someone stay no matter how well you think you may know them and no matter how much you think you are in love with them. You need to give it some time. I would suggest going to see someone even more than 3 or 4 times before anyone makes a move. Even that is rushing it but it is a little safer. That is why you hear so many times about we talked and finally met then I never heard from them again. That is because the jaded feeling was dismissed by meeting the other person. Sometimes it is just the thrill of the chase. No one should get so wrapped up in an internet relationship until you actually meet otherwise one or the other is quite possibly and most of the time for sure going to be hurt. There are so many things to be considered. The person you are talking to may sound so much like what you wan't but when you learn their actual lifestyle, habbits, family, friends, children, location, etc. you may not be as excited as you thought you were. I'm not saying it always works out for the worst but just beware and be prepared and most of all don't give away your heart to someone on the internet until you meet.

i currently have this situation..met online, became good friends, we spoke everyday online, the phone and used cam, as time went on the feelings became stronger and it moved onto another level. nearly three years have gone by since we first started chatting and we have both told each other the 'L' word i dont know how real that can be and have asked this question here and i have been grateful for the replies. We have spoken a lot about meeting up, especially as we have been talking for such a long time but I'm too scared, not in a scared for my life kinda way lol just i'm scared that if it goes badly and one or both dont feel the same about each other as we did online then thats a massive part of my life that will change or even disappear. Also my other worry is, what if it does go well, what happens when the other one has to go home? and you have to continue your 'relationship' online because your are so far apart. i dont think moving would be an option for either one of us and i worry everyday he might find someone in the 'real' world. but even that makes me torn because i want him to be happy and he deserves to have someone 'real' but the selfish part of me wants to keep him for me because i've never 'met' anyone quite like him :-(