A soldier ran up to a nun, out of breath, he asked,
“Please may I hide under your skirt? I’ll explain
later”. The nun agreed.
A moment later two military police ran up and
asked, “Sister have you seen a soldier?”
The nun replied, "He went that way. ”
After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from
under the skirt and said, “I can’t thank you enough
sister. You see, I don’t want to go t
o Iraq. ”
The nun said she understood completely.
The soldier added, “I hope I’m not rude, but you
have a great pair of legs.”
The nun replied, “If you had looked a little higher,
you would have seen a great pair of balls…. I don’t
want to go to Iraq either” :p
One day an Irishman goes into a pharmacy - reaches into his pocket and takes out a small Irish whiskey bottle and a teaspoon.
He pours some whiskey onto the teaspoon and offers it to the chemist.
"Could you taste this for me, please?"
The chemist takes the teaspoon, puts it in his mouth, swills the liquid around and swallows it.
"Does that taste sweet to you?" says Paddy.
"No, not at all," says the chemist.
"Oh that's a relief," says Paddy.
"The doctor told me to come here and get my urine tested for sugar."
You are being redirected to HM dept. of jokes and comedy.
The door is just past the dept. of silly walks but, before the society for putting things on top of other things.
Two women are kissing on a bridge, when a troll suddenly appears looking for a toll who promptly sees them. They jump up in horror and they exclaim "I thought you were a mythical creature that only appeared in books!" and the troll replied "Yeah, and I thought you were mythical creatures that only appeared in p-orn!".
Happy bday! Scorpios always seem depressed and hopeless..
I know you're young but do you like the Beatles?
Ok, I'll finish it for you. It's corny.
"I eat mop"
"I eat mop who"
Or maybe, What kind of car did jesus drive? A christler.
That was sooooooo corny dude...seriously...did you think that was funny?
Only if your into corny jokes. I don't see you trying.