Here is what I am learning from a really good therapist. Each person is born with an identity - at least a strong temperament of a certain type. The goal is to be that person - your true self. When you try to be something that is unnatural for you, you are being a false self and that leads to unhappiness, etc. Good parents help a child figure out who their true self is. If your parents were dysfunctional and controlling, then you have to work on figuring it out as an adult. This process can involve healing old pain from things people did to you that made you stop trusting, etc.
yes i am, its all about persistence and trusting yourself
I'm not the person I wanted to be as a kid. I don't think I'll ever be that person.... but I am closer to being part of that person. I may never be the stay at home mom living in the country with a giant mess of kids and animals, but at least I can attain the being happy, confident, and enjoying my life.... You know.... the part I have control over :)