I'll answer your questions in order, but you may not receive the answers you want to hear. I think I know what you're going to do anyway, yet asking the question will seem like your decision is justified ba<x>sed upon how many agree with it or not...But here goes.<br />
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1. What should I do? <br />
A: You're in a relationship with someone you like. Don't you think it's odd that someone just happens to bat their eyes at you? This is Karma testing you. We're given a choice. You have to decide whether or not you can live with the guilt, and if you decide to stay with the person you're with, how ****** will she feel when she finds out?<br />
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2. How should I feel?<br />
A. Well, you should feel flattered, wanted, excited...That's how it's supposed to feel. Like when a person goes on a game show and is already winning and then bets it all and loses it all. You don't know what this other women is going to do if you hook up with it. Don't know if she's stay, don't know if she'll leave right after she gets what she wants... And no one really thinks about that. And that's why it's called cheating.<br />
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3. How do you think ANY man in that situation would actually feel?<br />
A. Well, some men would think about the consequences, some men would just simply go for it. Some men actually like the person they're with enough to not let other women distract them. You need to decide whether or not you have integrity and honesty, and evaluate how much you really like the person that you're with. Because I've been on both sides of that equation, and feeling like 2nd best and being passed up for something better is a really ****** feeling.

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ok here is my answers to my own questions.
1. I should take no action because monogamy is implied in our realtionship and we have yet to have the explict conversation about it and/or possible rules.
2. of course I should feel flattered and even arosed anyone who doesnt is an idiot :)
3. same as above.
do we all live in conflict? yes.
should we? no.

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Ultimately, whatever you choose is going to affect the path you didn't take. Do you want to hurt someone's feelings and go for someone else? Or do you want to break it off with the person you're with? Or talk to this new girl love interest and let her know you're with someone? Or we could all be wrong... Being psychic would nice :)

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Do Nothing. Feel what you will, there isn't a rule book as far as feelings go. Flattered should be the answer, but honestly most would feel conflicted.

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conflicted...good answer

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If you're even posting this you are not committed to woman #1- be kind and let her find a decent man

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oh I havent supressed my nature enough to be 'ready' for a commited realtionship, is that it?

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Keep your sarcasm; I don't care what you do. You asked, I answered. You are with a woman, in relationship but still accepting overtures from another (or more). Be fair. Let woman #1 know you are still on the prowl so at least she can get tested for STDs, let alone stop investing in a long term commitment with you as you are not interested. Do what you want. Just be fair to Woman #1

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1. accepting overtures and having sex with someone else are two radically different subjects you are confusing two different things.
2. everyone who is honest with themselves would be compilmented and maybe even arosed its natural.

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You asked for an opinion on what you should do- wide berth for an answer-do what you want

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no I didnt. read it again I am very clear. Two of the questions is not asking what I should do but how I should FEEL and I am asking it that way on purpose.

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1. what should I do? (easy question, I know the answer but ask anyway)
TAKEN FROM YOUR Q DIRECTLY

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hmmm are in a committed relationship or open? would be the question. How would the girl in relationship feel? as long as you keep communication open with her.

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I think that ANY man would feel flattery, and feel good about the long gazes. It always feels nice /special when someone gives you attention in that way; but it sounds as though you really do like the girl you are with, and that's special =) the woman who gazes at you- was it just once?

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this is one of the better more honest answers.
to your question.... no.
I plan no action.

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Your choice of the word 'like', speaks volumes. Your choice of the word 'attractive', adds another chapter. As you are the same age as me though, I feel that I would like to remind you of the phrase 'having a midlife'... careful mate, life decisions in your forties may result in lifelong bliss; but the likelihood is that you will be booking yourself on for a course of Salsa lessons in five years time for some dirty dancing with an unwilling dance partner and be returning to a batchelor pad with a ready made meal for one whilst staring at your Corby trouser press in the corner of the room.

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are you implying without directly answering the questions that if one is in love they no longer notice attractive people giving them signs and even if they do they have no feelings about the event?

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Fair point! No I wasn't really implying that though - of course, I like to receive the glad eye when I go out on the town, but I wouldn't go for it. Mrs tarq isn't ideal, but neither am I, but... The grass is always greener, but also, there's no place like home! I have to go now, cos I'm all out of cliches!

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Is your relationship exclusive? Are you a committed man? Bottom line your choice will define your character. You can feel desired and flattered and leave it at that, but when you cross the line of pursuing the woman than you may create a series of events that you may regret later. Are you your penis or are you more? Can you control the one eyed wonder worm or are you led by it?

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1. defining ones character doesnt address how one may or may not feel but it does address the action question.
2. answering the feeling part of the question with both possible answers is being evasive or vague ?

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Dude stop trying to sound intelligent your statement makes no sense. Of course anyone male or female would feel great being desired even if that person turns your stomach or turns you on. Apparently the woman wants you and you want her it IS the actions that would define you and the situation.

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no I asked it as I did on purpose I was being explict for a reason.

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"The outer conditions of a person's life will always be found to reflect their inner beliefs." James Allen

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1 More Response

"In a relationship with sum1 i LIKE"-- not LOVE? <br />
well, I guess u answered YOURSELF.

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are you 10000% sure that is how it works?

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Be honest, all you need is someone to concur with your action; <br />
And not feeling so guilty after! ;)

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indirect answer to a direct question

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It doesn't matter what our answers is, you'll do what you wanna do! ;)

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well isnt that true for just about every question ever asked on EP?

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