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sounds heartbreaking. I value my marriage and love my husband.

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I believe 100% in the power of healing and the power to transform your life in every way possible. I don't care where you've been, what you've done, or who you are. I believe that you are a beautiful work of art that is continually being created and shaped into a perfect specimen.

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You would benefit from long-term counseling after all you have been through. You deserve to get through this and be supported.

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I'm already in therapy and have been for a year but my husband refuses to change, he thinks its all my fault for choices HE'S making and blaming it on me so I said **** this s**t, if he is going to deny me love, attention, sex, I'm going to get it somewhere else and I know that isn't going to fix things but it sure feels good for moment.

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Glad you are in therapy. Does he go with you? And you know that you can only change yourself, not him, right? Easier said than done.

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Broken people attract each other. By that metric your affair has a 100% chance of failing.

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