Nobody likes to be given an ultimatum. But I don't know the situation. Maybe she's been trying to tell you something and you haven't really heard her. It's tough to be a parent, even when your children are adults. I'd go for the counseling. It can't hurt and may help your relationship with her greatly.
I don't think councelling is the issue, your daughter needs to get a life... <br />
I have 2 daughters 24 and 21<br />
oldest knows she is never allowed back, and that taught her how to "have a life"<br />
Unless there is more to this, I say give the girl some tough love and let her figure her life out her self.
Sounds like a brat. Stand your ground.