I've only had one person say I was a vad seed and that was my father. All others say I'm a very kind person.
"I know when I was a kid I ate a beetle. I ate a beetle because I thought it was licorice."
thanks for b/a :)
My society has already condemned me, I have been assaulted by people who made it very clear what I am not to do and my life stands on the line. All it took is for one person to start vicious rumors about me, and then I knew it was over for good. A co-worker talked non-stop to everyone else about me for so long, that it caused me a lot of permanent damage to this day. Apparently, I was declared mentally incompetent, yet charged with some 16 offenses of which I know nothing about, it was dismissed, but then recently was overturned and I'm going to be arrested some time in the next month. This is according to what I'm hearing from others. When I was in the city in the more recent past, complete strangers were saying that I could be sentenced to a life sentence. I was declared mentally incompetent due to my past medical history/files and because my behavior was not what others deemed to be normal. It's my life, but everyone else, including intrusive strangers, are allowed to know all details, while I am kept on the side, knowing that any day now, I'll be locked up for life. What a totally fu***ed up world we live in, but I don't really care anymore. I know that nobody stood up for me, nobody fought for me, and I have no allies or true friends anywhere. I always knew my life meant sh** in this world, and I was right on target.
Thanks, I appreciate your words, and you're right. I do not trust anymore, I can't. So just do me a favor and when I'm gone from this site, and you'll know its because I'm either locked up or dead, just try to pass on some of my wisdom that I've left behind. Very few people in this world will ever see me completely, they've already made up their minds about me. If just a few people can see me, and know me, and really feel what I'm saying, it will all be worth it. It's way too late for me to make any fresh starts or anything. Just remember me in a good way, okay. I'm not a monster.
you're right; I was called the monster, yet the behavior and actions of others displayed who was really the monster in all of this. If someone had treated me with respect and dignity, none of this had to have developed as it did. I would have plead guilty to anything just to please those f***ing s-o-b-s! I would have unlocked the key to my own cell! If it was so important for them to see my demise, I would have let them do that. Now, I'm going to rot away, but the fact is, I've already began that process. The way in which I was treated, the viciousness of which I was exposed to, those are the real monsters! I can't even begin to tell you how deeply wounded I am and feel; the hurt inside me may never heal.
I'm very sorry for what happened to you. I really and truly am. I'll be okay off by myself with no outside world to contend with. I know I'll always be abused by someone in my life, roughed up, made to feel like nothing. But I will know that I am someone and that I'm everything but a nothing. I'm already destroyed forever by the forces sent against me to take everything I've worked so hard for, for years, and turn it into some mockery of a joke. Sure, I never rescued anyone from a burning car or building, but I did plenty to uplift lives and give people something more from myself. I'm just glad that before I go, I've had the chance to meet up with good people like yourself and been touched deeply because of it. Even my own family abandoned me and spoke against me; I've got zero support from anyone out there. I just have to accept that my life's path is this. It doesn't, or shouldn't, take away from the goodness that I have shown for years because I cared, because I f***ing cared for people, even strangers, because that's the kind of person I am. I'm done with believing in anyone. I had friends and people I knew for years just pick up and leave me alone, brush me off. But the worst thing about it all, is how wrongly I have been portrayed and attacked, and for all that, I will never receive any form of justice whatsoever, because from this day forward, people will always think I am the monster and deserve to rot.
Thank you. I am here for you and others, too. I know the holidays coming up don't help when you already feel down and out.
I lived with a empty void inside me for years; to a large degree, that void is still very much there. While I have found happiness and peace inside me, there is still that ache, that longing, that I know will never be filled. The holiday season just about kills me, it's so overwhelmingly sad for me.
yeah, and I forgot to tell you; my own family is trying to bring a million dollar lawsuit against me, and trying to aid the prosecutor in saying I am a liar and a disgrace. I was molested and raped as a child, and the fact that anyone is blaming me for what happened, by saying it didn't happen, is such a huge insult to what I endured and lived through. Plus people want to say I'm an animal killer, participated in animal killings, which is not true in any way. But like I said, a total war was waged against me, and it will never stop on any level.
Thank you so very much for your time and attention here; it really means a lot to me. I've felt everything you've said to me on a deep level, and feel you can see me much more clearly than most ever will. I wish you a ton of blessings always! I will try to think of you and others when I am going about my daily life.
Amen, and double Amen to that! God is the only one that can know the full truth, and His judgment counts above all others. You deserve to find everything that you are looking for, and I hope you will be led in that direction; in fact, I'm sure you ARE already. Keep the faith, friend. I think you are an incredibly wonderful person, my thoughts will be with you.
Amen, and thank you from the bottom of my heart for being here for me. I believe it's no coincidence that brought you here to me today.
yes, I believe in you, and you helped me to believe more fully in myself. May only good blessings come into our lives, and whatever else we face, may we be strong enough to realize all struggle is just temporary. I totally can't thank you enough.
Ask people, not me. Anyhow, in my 'circle' we do not bother about 'good' and 'bad'; we care about who helps and supports us, and who don't