Yeah. Everyone's different, while it may work for some it might not for others. It all depends on the person.
The only way you can administer "tough" love is by actually loving that person, which is pretty rare. Besides, the only way someone changes is by their own decisions. You would have to be there for them as support for all the highs and lows.
You can't make them stop but you have to make it clear you want them too. Do not do anything to give them the resources they need to enable the addiction, including your acceptance of it.
Almost always you've been enabling them all along. Maybe on purpose, maybe without realizing it, maybe it's a lot and maybe just a little. All tough love really is when you take it all away.
They need a good support network away from family,so family members can back away a bit and that's not easy either. I have not experience this but i know someone who is struggling with this at the moment.
Not really well,we had a chat last night. It's very draining for her but there's a few things she try hopefully. I'll check on her in a couple of weeks.
This the mum i speak too.
Sorry about that,i can type like that.I should have mentioned it was a friend from work who is dealing with this family issue it's tearing her apart.
Tough Love- is needed because sugar coating things wont always help someone at the end- people need someone that is real- because everyone needs a wake up call at some point- no matter how much it hurts to know what is
I have Lots of experience with addiction . Nothing you can say will work,they will only stop when THEY are ready. You can't help them.This is the hardest thing to accept. :)
this is true. and it sucks -3-
It only drives people away. I had two sisters and a Mother with addiction,both sisters are DEAD,and my Mother, is barely managing her addiction,cause one of my Brothers lives with her and constantly Battles with her. Sad :(
These are hopeless situations.When a person is an adult,unfortunately a person has a right to Kill themselves slowly with Drugs,and you can only stand by and watch.With my sisters I tried EVERYTHING to get them to stop,one of them got a restraining order against me,cause I went into her house and "removed" her Dealer,and took her drugs,and destroyed them,she pressed charges,against me. While I was in Jail for the night she Overdosed ,and Died. The story was similar with the other sister,If you bother them too much they just cut you out of their Lives,and you don't know what they are doing or how much. As I said if a person is an adult and wants to Kill themselves with Drugs,you are helpless to stop them,they have rights,those inclued killing themselves . :(
Your still young it's not too late for you, the way I look at it is if you can't stay high,why go there in the first place.Your only chasing your Tail.
Oh ,cutting,it seems lots of teens on here are into that,to be honest I have no idea what that does. Like any Habit,I guess after the habit is establishes it becomes part of your Life and is hard to stop. I quit Smoking,a year ago,after smoking for 45 years. The hardest part is NOT THINKING about it. If you can keep your mind on OTHER things. That is half the Battle.
I can tell you this for sure,the worse part is Thinking about it.If I let myself think about smoking a cigarette,I would go out in 5 minutes and buy a Pack and be right back smoking. That is why the thinking is the worst part. Whenever smoking crosses my mind,I quickly start thinking about something else. At first You think about the thing you want all the time,and have to continually keep shifting your thoughts,but with me,now that I have been quit over a Year It hardly ever crosses my mind any more. Don't get me wrong ,like right now I'm writing about it and thinking about it,I now have to start answering some OTHER questions to take my mind of cig's ,or I would still go out and buy a Pack. :)
but,,,that is the Key ,to kicking any addiction,DON"T "THINK" about it. If you remember this,it will help you Too. :)