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flowergirl1234 flowergirl1234 51-55, F 25 Answers Dec 22, 2011

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she did't take an oath with your husband

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Good grief, who would want to? It's always the same old story, and the phony-baloney drama between the mistress and the husband is always a hoot. "Oh, dahling, these precious moments together..." It's like walking into a daytime drama, with the grand pronouncements, the promises. Such a pile of ****.

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what would any of the two would gain? I think it makes no sense...

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Only if armed.

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Absolutely!

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I don't think its about a 'right' but if you thinks you will gain something from it then why not? Remembering of course that its your husband that cheated,that woman owes you nothing, regardless of how you think she may have wronged you unless she is a friend then why would she consider your feelings? Its him that made vows to you not her so she doesn't have same view point on the whole matter.

She may come to realise what a prat he is from a conversation or you may end up feeling you have serious competition on your hands, whatever happens you are going to end up hurt and that is never good :(

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I have had experience with this actually. I was told about the affair from the mistress over the phone. The benefit to talking to the other woman is possibility for closure. However there is a bad side to this as well. If you stay in the marriage as I did you will inevitably comapre yourself to her over and over. This is damaging to you and your marriage. No chance for forgive and forget. Remember this...it was his choice to cheat and you and him need to work it out in your own way.

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Hanna said nope! shoot in site.

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Problem not advisable. Most wives will seek revenge but the problem started with her husband. It's more his fault than the mistress.

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A woman has the right to talk to anyone that wants to talk to her. She doesn't need anyone's permission to do so. And if she does talk to the "other woman", she's liable to find out that she didn't know he's married, and through carefully comparing notes find out that there are at least 3 other "other women".

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Only if they want to be hurt even more. If the woman knew the man was married(most do) she obviously has already shown she cares nothing about the married woman's feelings. Why put yourself in such a situation? Best thing to do is confront the husband, he's the one who should be put on the spot. Either that or just leave. Wasting time digging into the specifics of the affair or confronting the "other woman", whats that gonna help? Most likely nothing at all.

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absolutely!!! but be prepared to get very upset because you are going to ask personal details and if she gives them up it is going to hurt..... but who knows maybe you hit it off and you wind up sleeping with her.....

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If she lives in the United States of America, she already has that right under the 1st Amendment of the US Constitution.



It amazes me that women somehow think that the man in their life, or just the fact that he IS in her life, creates a rule whereby she cannot go and speak or attempt to speak, to someone.



Actually, this woman is probably the one person she should speak to if she wants to get a clearer picture of what her man has been doing or is doing. But most women will speak to every friend they have, their mother, their grandmother, their neighbor, and at least one family counselor before they will even consider talking to the other woman. And, even when she considers talking to this woman, she believes she needs the philandering husband's permission to do so! in some cases, he will even talk her into taking him along so he can direct the conversation into the proper channels.



If you are an American woman, a citizen of the US, you can speak to anyone you like unless that person has specifically said he or she doesn't want to converse with you.

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I think this takes responsibility away from the man, does anything that the women can say or do change the outcome? HE had an affair.

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Most of the time--nearly all the time--the husband will tell as little truth as he can get away with when confronted with the uncovered affair. The woman he has been seeing is far more likely to tell the truth about whatever has been going on. Sometimes the wife needs this kind of perspective in order to decide how to proceed.

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Yes & No.



The other woman can hurt her more. She may also be in love with her partner.

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Usually, what we imagine is worse than the actual reality. If we have to feel bad about something, I think it is better to feel bad about a reality instead of what we imagine may have happened.

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Like that will work out well.

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why would she want to? she needs to talk to her husband as he is the one who betrayed her.

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Sometimes the perspective of the third end of the triangle can be helpful. Husbands who have just been caught cheating are not known for being open, direct, honest and straightforward.

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