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I'm not talking about forgetting, with the passage of time. I'm talking about really forgiving.
loveland loveland 41-45, M 25 Answers Nov 15, 2012 in Community

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Funny you're asking. I actually talked to the guy I bullied and he bullied me and I found out he's a great guy so know we are like best friends. I did forgive him, in my heart, truly

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Yes, I already have....I released every bad thing that was done to me and trying live my life as a better person!

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great, but you don't mention how you were able to forgive and how bad the transgression was that you forgave.

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The act against me was really bad, but I realized that the person behind the awful accusations was also in pain, so right then and there, I decided to forgive them and offered my hand to help them. They declined.....I have never spoken or heard from then again. If they decided to reach out, I wouldn't turn them away!

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Wow, it seems you have an incredible capacity for forgiveness. Please do write a story on it one day, and I'll be sure to read it my EP friend.

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I will write a story on forgiveness one of these days...thanks! Have a wonderful evening! :-)

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1 More Response

just never forget.

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I always Forgive,People are Far from Perfect,But I Never Forget,I won't Put myself in a Position to be Screwed again. :)

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I try to not even think about it. I want to forget the whole ordeal and not speak with them anymore. But I forgive them as long as we don't cross paths anymore.

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yes but what if you do cross paths. Is the forgiveness really there or is the bitter sting more likely to take hold?

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yes i do that. it's the resentful ones that never let go that i feel for.

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but you don't mention how you did it?

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if you took as many butt whippins that i have you'd now how i did it. it takes time man, you got think it out. i've changed a lot over the years and if i have done that then so can they. i learn from others thatpave a path and then i forgive even the most evil ones. it's not my problem if they don't let go.

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thanks for the reply

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Yes I did, and the end result was true happiness.

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but you don't mention how you did it?

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I took each person that hurt me (and I had many many of those) and in my mind I remembered each thing they did to me and I forgave what they did. I let the anger and hatred turn into pain of being betrayed. When the pain slowly healed so did the anger and hatred. I had forgiving them. It was will worth the effort. I also had to make the choice to live and not let what they did affect me. I chose to turn loose.

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thanks for the reply

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Already have

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but you don't mention how you did it?

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It's not something I do it's just who I am...Holding a grudge takes up more energy than I want to give

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thanks for the reply

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Never. Mostly because he hasn't even asked for forgiveness.

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Well said. When they have no guilt or remorse and have never sought forgiveness, it makes the thought of forgiveness deeply unattractive. Even worse, some people even carry on trying to hurt you (and turn others against you) despite all the despicable things they already did to you.

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I moved across the country to get away from him and the whole mess. So far so good.

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good luck with your new life. thanks for the reply

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Thanks for the insight. Twas well said (:

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I don't know that I have any enemies ... that would be on their end .. not mine.

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So no person has ever severely hurt you physically or mentally?

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No .. I've had pretty great people in my life.
But I played a role in that too .. I don't allow people to treat me badly to begin with.

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Thanks Barb. I'm sure you have a great personality and that has won you great friends. What I have trouble with is the concept of "i don't allow peopleto treat me badly to begin with". Sometimes we can not prevent a person from harimg us. Such as those who suffered abuse / rape / bullying / violence etc. Those people may carry a lot of pain caused by trangressors they were powerless to stop.

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We can't control how others treat us .. only how we allow it to affect us. Even with rape .. a horrible crime -- there are ways to heal from that .. and for our own well-being, we need to do that. We have to move on or they have taken our life from us.
We can agree to disagree here ...

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no disagreement here, i see your point. If a person allows their hurt and rage to continue indefinitely the trangressor has robbed not only their present but also their future. Moving on and healing is essential. Thanks for your insights.

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No.... I will ignore or put to the very back of my mind, but not forgive..

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I tend to this view at present and am not sure If I'm willing or capable of changing at present, based on the level of evil someone put me through.

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i try everyday then i see her and she does something to upset me again.

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Yes, some people don't know when to stop.

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He was killed, so I forgave him.

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Dare I ask...on second thoughts no i better not!

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No, it was not me. He became a gangster and police killed him in some raid. Seen his pic. in news. Was not suprised. He bullyed me @ school.

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A bully turned gangster. Sounds like he was not a nice piece of work. thanks for the reply

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I think I did the forgetting part first, because I don't even remember who my worst enemy is.

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already did.

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Great, but you don't mention how.

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a lot of therapy

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I'm glad it helped with the healing. Thanks for your replies.

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