both, but they need to know when to shut up and when to assist. Essentially, to assist only when invited. Though they could offer when they thought it was needed. But otherwise, let me learn for myself.<br />
Though there is another option, that is to be much more subtle when offering advice. For instance, through stories....."I once found myself wandering why people didn't like getting advice, then I tried something different and put the advice into a personal story that showed empathy and presented the advice as what I had done that worked for me. That didn't upset people anywhere near as much."
Always open to advise...always my choice to use it or not..that is how it is when I give advise...they ask, I give, take it or leave it....:)
I look at the pro and cons, then make up my mine.
I like you just the way you are. I hope you never change.
I like a caring friend.Even if I may not listen to them always.
Which is why a wise friend will let you fall. 99% of the time if you offer self-help to a "friend" they take it as demeaning advice--or you know better--etc. (like you). So mostly it's ignored--even resented if one does offer advice. Best to just let them fail on their own.
You said you'd likely not even listen to it from friends. My point. Why not listen---unless their advice don't matter to you anyway--or in some way you think it is stupid? Friends can sense that---see that--when they offer and then see the listener shrugs it off. That makes them feel like "why bother?" So end run---just keep the advice to yourself--even if you think it helpful and let the person who listen anyway fail on their own.
...who WON'T listen anyway......
friend of course but its never as simple as that friends may become lovers and lovers never stay friends
most friends care there is no other kind in my life i dont entertaind the nasty ones jus my view