Im sorry, it seems you were dealt an unfair hand, many people get the short end of the stick and it makes them feel drained and hopeless, i just wanted to come on and say Yes, Love really does exist, because i have seen it, and I did feel it myself once, even though it was a disaster and still hurts 4 years later... but still, i have seen love to amazing things, it softened my c*nt of a brother into a decent guy, he has been with her for 7 or 8 years now, and they are engaged and happy as ever, just bought a house. Its a sad state of affairs when my practical brother with no poetry of any kind in his soul is my go-to example of real love but there it is. I do believe that real love is quite rare though, so there is nothing wrong with anyone who cant find it.
You are depressed. I know, I have spent most of my life being depressed. See a doctor and he should be able to give you something to take the edge off things for you. I take Zoloft, and I swear by it. Very much worth the week or more of waiting for it to kick in. It is a very gentle feel-good thing, not strong or 'druggy' at all.
only for some people, unfortunately im not one of them
nothing you are fine
Sounds about average.
It does, as long as you keep throwing logs in the fire.