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Ok, so for years I have been afraid for my friends to get into relationships because they seem to drop their friends for that one person. I don't really understand why? Especially now that I am young adult, it seems very childish. So, can you tell me why you would do that and if you did was it worth it?
diania234 diania234 18-21, F 5 Answers Jul 8 in Dating & Relationships

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You shouldn't have to

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I'm not sure I would want to have a "friend" in my life that was 'afraid for me to get into a relationship' ba<x>sed on the fear of loosing me... I'd want a friend that could be happy for me, and still be there even though we wont spend as much time together as we used too, and I'm lucky to have friends like that. ...so yeah, dropping an egocentric somebody that's afraid of my happines will get in the way of hers is def. worth it and I'd do it in a bl<x>ink of an eye.

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True, but I have had friends that would completely forget about you once they were in a relationship and I mean like making plans to hang out with you and then standing you up. Then seeing on Facebook she went to watch a netflix movie with her boyfriend instead. Like, I have had some very drastic experiences that makes me fear these relationships, lol. I have seen people who left their friends stranded just to be with their boyfriend

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well I did experience that too, more when I was around your age... thing is, when people fall in love, all they want is to be with the other person at least for the first 3 month or so, if they could be honest about that and say it as it is, there wouldn't be the big issues (shouldn't be) but most people would respond badly to that... so instead they get stood up, (which would **** me off too) maybe make it a habit as to tell your friend when they get a relationship, that you will give them the space they need for now and still be there (if you will) when they snap out of love. Some of my best friends are people that I can go months without talking to or seeing, and when we meet it's like we just met up yesterday. nobody likes to be the friend that forgets others because of a new love, let them know you accept their time to be alone, and step back for a while. if they still screw you over even after you've given them that... then **** it, there was no real friendship to begin with, and you haven't lost anything. (wow that was long...)

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That was a really great response honestly! That makes more sense that they are in the puppy dog phase so they would want that time alone. I respect that, but I do not respect the extreme selfishness that could come with it. Honestly, I did get mad at your response for a while because they would justify they wrong actions with your response. But, in all honesty I forgot that the people who treated their friends horribly when they got into a relationship, weren't good friends to begin with. It seemed more like their relationships would emphasize their narcissism or selfishness.

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it's not that they drop their friends... they just have a new closer friend...

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Ok, but why should your other friends suffer?

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why should they suffer??? they shouldn't... they should be happy for their friend.

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They should but let's say because of your relationship, you only see your friends when that special someone is busy, or your friend is going through a hard time and you are not there for them because you have this "new best friend". Then at this point you are not a friend anymore.

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I didn't drop anything, priorities change, life changes. I have had children, i am too tired to go to clubs anymore and they dont want to come to my house and listen to kids so there is a give and take. Such is life. Yes it was worth it, i have an amazing husband and relationship i have 6 amazing kids and thats what's important

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That's great! That is actual good reason why your friendship would drift apart.

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