It varies by person to person and best if you are warmed up and he is gentle, respectful, slow, and you both communicate. For the love of God use protection.
It was sorta random for me. I lost it in the back of a car to a guy whose name I don't remember (I was young, drunk and seriously foolish), and I can't say it was spectacular or very memorable, it hurt a bit but I was too wasted to pay much attention to it.
If you want my advice (as an experienced, sex-loving woman) on how to make losing your virginity less random/painful/regrettable:
- Fingering. When you're a virgin your "opening" is often really tight, that's normal, but it hurts more like that. If you make your boyfriend finger you first a couple of times, the muscles of your vagina will relax and you'll get more used to being touched down there, which makes it all less complicated. I wish I had known this that first time; my second partner was older and much more considerate, I learned a lot from him.
- ************. Get to know yourself between your legs. Men LOVE getting directions, and you can't give them if you have no clue what you like down there.
- P-o-r-n. **** is not a good educational tool in general, but it will make you so much more comfortable with sex.
If you're not sure that you want to do it, don't do it. It's not actually wrong to lose your virginity, though. Judgmental people might decide to pick on you for it.
Coming from a stranger this may not mean anything, but wait, please, just wait. And wait again. He may tell you he loves you and you may agree, but it will end. It will.
what doesn't end though, right? :) only things invisible to eyes last beyound our mortal lives...
These things shouldn't be planned...
on the contrary. A woman's first time she will NEVER forget and she should have a lovely memory of it, at least not just mediorcre. It should be plannned, for HER fist time; romantic etc, etc.
Perhaps he should plan it for her....instead of it just being like; we are gonna do it on this day..and that just being the end of it...maybe he should plan it, and make it romantic and such....
to be frank the human body is ready @ 13 or so i mean hundreds of years ago men and women were getting married @ that age. wouldnt it be safe to assume that humanity along with longer life spans, are able to be ready eariler? our laws prohibit marriage "so young" for reasons other than i can explain. hes ready. your body is most likely ready but your mind is not. i said marriage 3 times. the best thing is to wait and figure on other ways to express that physical desire or please his... todays society is so complex. ever wonder why there are so many bad marriages today? just wait. we all still have alot to learn
Sorry to say but I think you are too young to be in such a serious relationship. You may love him but first loves rarely become loves for your lifetime. Wait until you are older and sure that you two will last.
I know this because I lived it. My first time was when I was 20 and I was so naive and sure it was the real deal and I married him, and now i am divorcing him.
For the first time, it hurts. It always hurts, and most of the time they don't even care about the pain. If you're nervous or excited, then go ahead. But are you nervous and excited, or frightened? If so, what are frightened of? Are you insecure of your body, are you scared that you might mess things up. Or maybe are you scared, that he won't be good enough? Well the answer is simple. If you're scared. Don't go along with it.
I don't regret it one bit. I mean, you have to think about your relationship in particular, but it isn't always bad. A little painful though.