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Sparrowhawk1161 Sparrowhawk1161 51-55, M 10 Answers Oct 5, 2012 in Romance & True Love

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Yes, I did, and no, I don't think it helped with anything. By the time I got to the age that I started to 'notice' boys I stopped hanging out with them so I didn't get any insights that may have helped later. I just learned how to burn insects with the sun and how to blow up things with firecrackers. I'm hoping I will never need this information in my marriage.

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Unless you have a son? Then all that stuff can be very important. Especially when he catches flies and cooks them... and places firecrackers in objects that can blow up. Then you will have to put his chemistry set in the attic, so if he blows himself up, ti will only take out the attic and not the whole house!

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This is good to know! lol

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Ya know what? This is a sick question, ok?

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You're the one that read it that way.

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Here's a paper bag. Don't forget to give it to the flight attendant. She love it!

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hahaha, that didn't enter my mind till I read what you said, ewwwwh.

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I am just kidding! Is it really that bad to play with guys when you were very little? Could it have helped you to understand guys in the future when you date? That's really the question? But, I can guess that playing with guys can be really sick. Especially since they never take baths, spit and are always bad dressers...

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Ladies? Your supposed to be ladies, right? You have such dirty minds!!

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The question is this... When you were young and you had girlfriends to play with, did you find a guy to be your friend, too? Even though the girls made fun of you because you found a guy to hang around with, because playing with guys was a taboo, did you put your foot down and said, "I am not taking this stupid taboo! I like this guy and I will play with him!" So, this guy became like a "girl/guy" friend and you played together. He was like just one of the girls but he was a guy becasue he took you seriously and made you feel just like you wanted the girls to do. Made you feel special and treated you as a "friend?"
And, because of this guy, did it have an effect on when you found yourself in puberty... when you started liking guys a lot? Did that relationship actually help you with your love endevours and help you now at a time when you seek or found the love of your life? Or, did it hinder you? Did it make it even worse to find guys, because they were once nice playmates and now that you found that they a sexy, it actually hurt you in finding love?
Does that spell it out?

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I get it, but at first glance it lookedlike you were intimating something else.

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Play ='s having a friend to hang out with. Yeh, I guess it could have been read that way. Because of this site, you can get all types who imagine play to be much more "sexy." Or ... well you know...
And, you other posters, do not expand on the statement, "you know.." with 'what do mean, well you know?'" dirt minds...

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5 More Responses

I grew up with a lot of boys. To not get picked on by them I had to learn to fight. As we got older the feelings began to change, I cried when my best friend (a male) asked me out, I was confused and late at getting on to the dating scene. I think there is nothing wrong with it, I mean I got to understand a male's point of view, how they are fix it creatures not one to comfort as much as I would like one to (lol) but the downside is, that I am quite difficult to date, I seem to throw challenges at them because this gives a thrill and a chase, but also I am competitive so I usually lose them but win a empty victory. My failure :)

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It' not competitive. It's being realistic. You are trying to find the best guy who can love you. You have played with boys. You liked it. You found that boys are attractive. You know the true meaning of what it is to be a boy, for you found it and can see it.
Guys are practical to a point of being admitted to a psych hospital. They hold back emotions because they were told to do it from day one of their lifes and everyday they live, they do the same thing. All the time.
Yet, you remember those times when they were... boyish and emotional and cute and fun... and those things are still in him. Guys are the product of society. Cold...calculated and unemotional.
But, you are a woman. Much more of an emotional being. Which means you had to survive all types of maniputation from other girls to get where you are. To, be who you are. To second guess every word, every sentence and every line that comes from another girl. To survive the gauntlet of female ridicual and still be living to tell the tale. Which means you have become an emotional powerhouse when it comes to understanding anything that is emotional... even him. This guy who PRETENDS to be unemotional. Watch. Study... See him as he is and you will find that he hasw been raised from day one to see... no emotion!
Can you see his kettle boiling? Can you see those emotions coming to the surface? The rage? The pain? The helplessness that comes from living a life so emotionally controlled that he has no idea what emotions he has?
And, you the expert on emotional manipulation. Which means you have learned something that is so valuable that people just hope to find it. Emotional understanding.
And, you found a man who has none of this and needs your help. And, understanding this can help him. Creating as bond of emotional understanding with a person who has no understanding with an expert which can help him? Help you... and create a bond worth finding?
This is not a failure in a relationship. It's actually an opportunity to create one...

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Wow thank you for your input, this is amazingly accurate, I am an observer, I do have memories about witnessing 'Man to a boy, giving hard advices or harsh sentencing, ridicule, humiliation being put on these young boys for experiencing emotions which was labelled as a 'sissy, girlie and more' being the youngest I carried a lot of their emotions for them, I did a lot of crying for them and anger too (lol). Also I've had to quietly let them vent, breakdown and cry, they know I won't speak of it to anyone but they needed to feel safe unloading knowing that I understand then once they let it out they put their 'warrior' suit back on and go back to their 'war like' zone world. To me that is some amazing strength being brought up in a emotionally controlled society but it is also sad, because the man that looks arrogant and cold? I remember him as a boy, sharing his thoughts, his ambitions his hopes his dreams, but to be accepted as a man as he got older? He had to be what society dictates what 'Man' is. When you mentioned about being an emotional being and surviving all types of manipulation from other girls, this is very true. I understand there was a learning experience here for me, for her(s) it was warming up in my primary years, it become a rollercoaster ride in my teenages years, it became a survival in my twenties, it is now understanding in my thirties :) Thank you so much for your comment it meant a lot...You also made me look at my own situation as an opportunity to create something out of what I honestly thought was failure.

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No, because if a boy came over he would be scared to come back...familes..-.-

so no and no

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yeah...

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Oh, come on! I played with a girl on a camping trip when I was 10 years old and she was a long dark haired mermaid complete with scuba fins swimming in a clorinated pool... and I was so intrigued I said, "hello." When she she showed me off to her family they were in a middle of an arguement that scared me so bad, I decided to stay outside the door for my own safety. We hit it off, thou. My reasons were quite personal! She could dive deeper on the deep end of the pool than I could and I needed to show her I could do the same and... more importantly, I wanted to try out those scuba fins! I liked those. I was gentleman though... I gave them back!

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Yeah lets just say my brothers didn't like boys around me

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I hate the idea of brothers who think that you can't find your own love, and are so protective! If they can't find their own loves, who are they to tell you that you can't find your own?

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idk

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When i was in preschool pretty much all my friends were guys xD and i have no idea.. i guess ? :p

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Remember those kids and all you did with them when yoiu were still a little girl. Those little boy kids are still in them. They never forget. It goes into there subconscience... which means they are still in there. Which means they are still little boys at heart. And, the heart is what you seek, right, when looking for a relationship?

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