Two Dubliners are walking home from the pub one night and stop on a bridge to relieve themselves. "brrr," the first man says, "this water is cold!" "Yes" agreed the second man "and deep too"
Teacher: "Sam, you talk a lot!' Sam: It's a family tradition". Teacher: "What do you mean?" Sam: "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher". Teacher: "What about your mother?" Sam: "She's a woman".
What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac do at night? Lays awake wondering if there's a dog.
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar.<br />
The first one orders of beer.<br />
The second one orders half of beer.<br />
The third one orders or quarter beer.<br />
The bartender says "you're all idiots"<br />
And pours them two beers.
Yeah! Someone told me santa is not really! I thought to myself.....it can only be a joke.