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Hi. I'm TheBlackGuru and I'm shy. How can I change?

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    Best Answer (Chosen by Voting):

    AutumnSwan - 51-55 years old - female

    Posted by AutumnSwan May 20th, 2012 at 7:32AM

    Make yourself speak to one stranger every day, even if it's a simple, single sentence to someone waiting in line with you. The following week, make it two or three strangers you speak to, even if it's just sentence like "This store is crowded today." Build up until you speak to everyone you met; just a simple sentence, but make it nearly everyone you encounter. It will take time, but the shyness will start to fade a bit and it will be easier.

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  1. IAmUndercover - 18-21 years old

    Reply by IAmUndercover May 20th, 2012 at 11:38AM

    You know your stuff. I read pretty similar things in practical psychology books, they are really good pieces of advice. :) (I am actually trying that right now)

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  2. AutumnSwan - 51-55 years old - female

    Reply by AutumnSwan May 20th, 2012 at 11:56AM

    I was painfully shy as a child; it was the advice my mother gave me and it worked. Even now, while I'm no longer shy, I'm reserved, so I make myself talk to strangers daily. Good luck; you'll do great!

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2 Answers to "Hi. I'm TheBlackGuru and I'm shy. How can I change?"

  1. IAmUndercover - 18-21 years old

    Posted by IAmUndercover May 20th, 2012 at 11:47AM

    You need to get out of your comfort zone. It might be easier to avoid contact with other people (I know that!), but at the same time you cannot change things if you stick to that. Just like AutumnSwan said, start talking to people. It might be easier to talk to strangers (even though it doesn't seem like it!), because they don't know you and you'll probably never meet them again (or, if you do, they won't recognise you). Which means even if you screw up, it will be okay. You might be surprised to find out that if you're shy and don't talk to people, they might think you're arrogant.

    I noticed that when I went to some stores to buy stuff. I used to think those people behind the counters are unfriendly; however, their reaction is very often based on what preconceptions they have about you. When I finally realized that, I started smiling more, asking them about a certain product or requesting a piece of advice; they were more eager to help when I proved I didn't bite.

    I can talk a lot on this subject... Just tell me if you need help. Oh, and I don't think the "BlackGuru" thing is going to help much... :))

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