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I have a friend, an ex, really, who among other things feels a need to lash out when she is troubled. This lashing out has been on going, and I've been chewed out for everything from not answering texts immediately to having nervous breakdowns. I have not often returned these hurtful sentiments, and have acted under the belief that she needs to vent her frustrations at her life. Even if it's extreme, it's what friends do, yes? Recently I got a text from this person stating that she needed to hurt me, and know that I was being hurt, to get on with her life, as well as vocalizing a sentiment that she wanted to leave the area because I was here. I know, you will believe whatever you want. I have never abused, cheated, stolen, or otherwise significantly harmed this person. My largest flaws are problems communicating, time management, and my depression. I don't know if I should continue being this person's friend. Or how to proceed if that's the right option. Thoughts?
Dani3Forsyth Dani3Forsyth 26-30 14 Answers May 17, 2012

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NO! You shouldn't! Sounds like she is abusive and targets you, probably because you're depressed. You should totally cut her out of your life and find friends who are supportive and caring! Stop being a whipping boy!

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Not NO, but HELL NO.

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I think she's emotionally and verbally manipulating you.<br />
This sort of behaviour is not friendship.<br />
Good friendships are predominantly mutually loving and nurturing.<br />
Everyone makes mistakes, and these can be forgiven.<br />
But your "friend" doesn't know respect, compassion or empathy... this sort of person is toxic to be around.

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NO! After reading some of your posts it's obvious that nothing prepared you for dealing with anger, let alone rage. Unfortunately, this lack of preparation left you with no defenses against her. You hate to be angry, while she thrives on it. This is clearly a toxic and unhealthy relationship for you. You need to realize that people with deep-seated anger and rage issues rarely get over those issues, and the need to hurt others rarely goes away. Please, keep yourself safe--and sane--by moving on. I wish you all the best.

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No, this isn't friendship.

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may be a high conflict personality disorder. if your incapable of maintaining protective boundaries id be considering cutting ties. it can be a real juggling act with exes that want another bite at the pie

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Keep your friends close and your enemy's closer.

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Old idea based on knowing what to expect so as to be better able to defend.Applies in politics and war. Does NOT apply in friendships or normal societal conditions.

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Honest answer: If you keep this relationship up, you will always get hurt...better to seek help for the one who likely will hurt you, physically and otherwise...

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Go with your gut.<br />
The thing is, your ex is an ex for a reason. I'd move on so the both of you can.

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I think it might be best to part ways. And tell her exactly that. It's clear that you two aren't seeing eye-to-eye, and maybe in the future you could try again, but for now, it's probably best that you take a time out. <br />
If friends aren't having fun, something's not right!

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this is not a friend,real friends love and want whats best for you------move on-----you deserve better-------

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