How can I cope with such painful traumatizing memories?
When I was 10 my nana was violently attacked by my aunt with a hammer. After sinking into a coma she passed away a mere 5 weeks later leaving my aunt in prison for murder. Now 9 years later I still relive those 5 weeks as if it was yesterday. I remember everything about those days all down to the lighting of the room and what other people were doing. My worst memories were visiting my nana in the ICU and seeing her head all bashed in. Being 10 it didn't really hit me but every year it gets worse. The pain I deal with everyday is so stressful for me. It keeps me from doing my daily routines well. Every year it gets worse and on top of the PTSD I suffer from that, I have problems from before and after that that affect me as well. I'm not sure how to keep going by year after year with the pain and vivid images running through my head at least once a day. I'm not sure what to do anymore because the sadness just takes over my life. While the rest of my family gets better I get worse. Help?