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When I was 10 my nana was violently attacked by my aunt with a hammer. After sinking into a coma she passed away a mere 5 weeks later leaving my aunt in prison for murder. Now 9 years later I still relive those 5 weeks as if it was yesterday. I remember everything about those days all down to the lighting of the room and what other people were doing. My worst memories were visiting my nana in the ICU and seeing her head all bashed in. Being 10 it didn't really hit me but every year it gets worse. The pain I deal with everyday is so stressful for me. It keeps me from doing my daily routines well. Every year it gets worse and on top of the PTSD I suffer from that, I have problems from before and after that that affect me as well. I'm not sure how to keep going by year after year with the pain and vivid images running through my head at least once a day. I'm not sure what to do anymore because the sadness just takes over my life. While the rest of my family gets better I get worse. Help?
jos93 jos93 18-21, F 9 Answers Feb 12, 2013 in Loss in the Family

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I don't know what I could say to help you. I do want to try, I don't know what<br />
I could say or do. I hope so much that you find something or someone to<br />
help you with this. My best hopes and wishes go with you. Sean

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thank you so much

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You're welcome. Anytime you want to talk, you can
try me. I probably can't be much help, but I'm willing
to listen if you need that. I hope things get better for you.

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thank you so much. its so hard to find people these days that will just sit back and let you vent. i really appreciate it.

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Get help from loved ones and friends. Talking about it really does help. Seek out a good professional therapist too. Good luck. We on EP are here to.

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thank you for the advice

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I had a traumatic experience as a kid... very traumatic, that made me very lonely and insecure. But then, I made the choice to change my life, and do not live only by a memory. What do you do? Tomorrow wake-up and do exercise, do your study/working or look for a job, get into a class.... you'll know, and take it as a challenge to be the best you can be

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I'm sorry you dealt with that. I have no motivation anymore to do anything. Every year it gets worse. I used to have plans and goals in my life and now I can't even properly take care of myself.

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I've been there, I even became a burden to the family, and took heavy medication. One day I was in my room, and I woke up, and I saw the light of the sun, and it was very warm it was like the first time I saw the sun... I really woke up, and after that I never stop.
Now I'm finishing my PhD in Europe (applied bio-math), work in a hospital, and I make proud my whole family.

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thats great! i hope my moment comes soon. i want my happiness and success back in life.

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Surround yourself with people and things to do. Just keep busy and constantly thinking of other stuff to occupy yourself. Also you should talk to someone about it.<br />
<br />
Or<br />
<br />
Do a bunch of drugs and Alcohol and repress the memories.

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those are some of my problems now. i have substance abuse issues that have made it hard for me to keep going on to. at this rate it feels like a downward spiral.

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let your family know that you're going through this and I'm sure insurance will cover you going to talk to someone. The more that you talk about it with people, the less effect it will have on your daily routine.

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after my nanas murder my whole family fell apart. my dad became distant and my mom (it was her mother and sister) became a violent alcoholic. my brother is still my best friend but doesn't suffer any problems from it. my family and i are so distant now that i cant even talk to them about good things. its to the point where its like strangers living under the same roof. i feel very alone in my life.

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lots and lots of cognitive behavioral therapy. Trust, that's what I did and I'm a totally different person now, it's the only way.

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thank you for the advice

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I'm sorry to hear that your childhood got damaged by aunt. I've never experienced what u went thru but I know one thing it'd have messed me up alot.
There are different ways of exorcising the ghost of memory.
CBT
Counselling

See your aunt and demand why she hurt your nana. That's a closure for u. Say things you've wanted to say to her to get things off your chest. Do it while she's still in prison so that you're safe. After that cut her out of your life.

Church is a good place to lite candles for your nana. It may be bring u little peace.

Visit her grave and have a cup of tea with her :)

My own idea:
U say u think about it daily.
Try to spend 5-10mins everyday thinking of what happened to your nana and refuse to think about during the day. U can use that for when a man breaks your heart too.

Remember u were 10 and u were there and saw it all. They didn't that's why they dealt with it better and everyone copes differently.

Stay strong. Take care.

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I know this is an old post. I hope this reaches you. Google Gary Craig EFT. EFT stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques. This is something you can do yourself, that you don't have to buy, that takes only minutes, that will CURE your PTSD. That's right, I said CURE. There are plenty of videos demonstrating this technique, as you will see. <br />
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I had a very abusive childhood and also witnessed terrifying events. As an adult I was plagued by PTSD. When I was 37 I came across EFT, learned it from the manual that Gary offered online for free, and began doing it. My results were nothing short of astonishing. I couldn't believe it. I went through every nightmare experience, and flattened them all. My PTSD was gone. I felt euphoric. I was finally free. <br />
<br />
I used the Tell the Story Technique. I am so grateful to Gary for offering the manual free. God bless him.<br />
<br />
BTW, I have never had therapy. Without insurance it was beyond too expensive.<br />
<br />
I hope this helps you, and anyone else suffering out there.<br />
<br />
God Bless.

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I had some PTSD issues. One of them was getting hit by a car like in the movie, "Meet Joe Black". When Joe Black was hit by the first car, that describes what happened to me. If you haven't seen the movie, the accident clip is on Youtube. Ok, I'm not comparing sob stories here but I am wanting to help you move in the right direction. I carried that with me for years and my councilor suggested treatment since she thought it was causing PTSD. Be accountable to someone who can help you. Seek professional help. I'm not a doctor so I am not going to say the treatment that worked for me should be given to you. It did help. You have to take the first step.

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