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Home  >  Life in General  >  General  >  Resolved Question
ThirstyDesert
Resolved Question
How can I stop loving a guy who is "just a friend"?
but we both know that we are more than just best friends.
Posted 2 months ago
CrimsonTears
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
I have tried, and I can't. But my life would be too empty without him, so I continue to be just a friend. We met as friends, we loved as friends. No matter what, as he once told me, "in some form or other we will always be friends."

He's a sweet guy with a very big heart that he hides. One day he's gong to make one very lucky girl very happy. I just wish I were the one. Whatever happens, I'll be happy if he is happy, cause when he is sad I am crushed.

If he can't love me, it's ok, cause I'll carry his heart, in my heart. And as I've told him in the past, no matter what you do, or where you are. always remember.... someone in this world does love you.
Posted 2 months ago
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DuncanMcNeil
Posted Sep 6th, 2008 at 8:18PM
Unless they feel the same way, you can't.

If that's too much for you to handle, you may have to cut your ties with them. I would argue though, if you love someone, you're happy with as close as you can get to what you want most of all.

It'll hurt, it'll make you jealous, it won't make sense, you'll go insane. I'd love a girl who was my friend and wanted more, if there were no complications. I can't think of anything I'd want more, except maybe superpowers.
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ShoreGuyCT
Posted Sep 6th, 2008 at 10:50AM
The million dollar question.

This may sound harsh but you have to either tell him or get him out of your life completely. I had a friend who I loved but couldn't tell. It drove me crazy! Eventually she left and I recovered from the pain.

If you can't let him know how you feel you will slowly make yourself even more miserable than you already are.

Hopefully he feels the same for you. I'm sorry and wish you good luck.
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ElLagarto
Posted Sep 6th, 2008 at 11:29AM
Marry him.
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Saby
Posted Sep 6th, 2008 at 11:33AM
Tell him.
I know this very well; happened to me last fall;
I told him - and he told me I was just a friend of his.
I had a broken heart for long, but it's better than nothing at all...
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Generika
Posted Sep 6th, 2008 at 1:46PM
If he hasn't made a move by now, chances are, he doesn't want to. Don't try to "convince" him that you are made for each other; if he gives him, he will eventually resent you. If a man likes you, he doesn't wait to tell you.....I had to learn this lesson the hard way. Wait for a guy who is crazy about you and is willing to show it!
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fungirlmmm
Posted Sep 6th, 2008 at 2:56PM
Gosh, I know how thos feels. To pretend t the whole world that you are just friends when in your heart you would love to declare that you are the World's number one couple. I regret that I didn't declare this with my friend when he admitted that he loved me. He is married to the woman that I "hooked" him up with and they have kids that are my God Children and I am stuck with wondering in the back of my mind all the "what if's." If you both are feeling it why are you not going for it?
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WyldHoney
Posted Sep 6th, 2008 at 4:22PM
I have always thought that the only way to get over someone is to find someone new to fill that gap in your heart.
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countryboy52
Posted Sep 6th, 2008 at 4:52PM
If You both Love each other, You can't ignore the Love that You have for each other, no matter how hard You try. I Hope & Wish the Best for You both. Your Friend Always, Michael
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MysticalDreamer
Posted Sep 6th, 2008 at 10:54PM
I wish I knew the answer because I'm in the same boat as you are. I'm in love with someone I work with...have been for the past 10 years. It sucks, but I will never tell him. I would rather have him in my life as a friend than not in my life at all.
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RobertHedrock
Posted Sep 7th, 2008 at 2:52AM
I don't have any answers but I do have some insight. I was in love with a work colleague for a couple of years. We were friends outside of work too, but she had a boyfriend so there was never any question of taking it to the next level, even if she'd been interested.

I kept the "just a friend" thing going until she moved away to take another job. That was the best thing that could have happened, because it ended the pain I didn't realise I was putting myself through.

I missed her when she left, but I got over it eventually.
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RunningFreeAndStu
mblingDown
Posted Sep 7th, 2008 at 4:15AM
You... can't.

I had the same thing with my best friend for over a year. The reason it wasn't sorted out was that we were both too scared to admit it.
For that reason I would like to say "tell him" but I know how hard that is and that there's a chance you'll never do it anyway. If you have the courage(I didn't)... do it. If you don't, I guess that if he's in love with you too, eventually things will work out the way they should. In the end people who are really in love can't be "just friends" around each other anymore. Something will happen if it's meant to.

Me and my best friend are a couple now. We admitted it eventually, but only after we ended up making out after an afternoon of "just friends" talking ;)
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