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I'm a paranoid person. I have hardly any friends, and my first attempts led me to being back-stabbed by people who pretended to be my friend only to hurt me. Well, I met this guy a few weeks ago, and I learnt a few things about him, mostly about him getting into fights and the way he works out constantly to be stronger than everybody else. I asked him if he thinks he's superior to everyone and he said he was physically. I told him how I could trust him and that he's the type of guy I'd expect to see in a prison. I said ''what if someone is rude to you? You beat them up? That isn't right.'' Well he ended up explaining why he beat those people up (because they attacked him first). I was against that at first, because I was raised to not retaliate. Anyway I told him I'm really sorry if that just sounded inappropriate and he said 'Nah it's cool.' I said I'll trust him and he said he won't be like those 'friends' that I had. I sent him a message on facebook asking if he'd like to hang out sometime. He said 'oh so youve gone from not trusting me to wanting to hang out lol'. I had a conversation after that about films. He's 18 years old and I'm wondering if I've damaged anything...I have Asperger Syndrome (he doesn't know) and it makes me say some impulsive stuff that I only recognize as inappropriate later onwards. I'm wondering if I damaged the friendship at all, or if things are cool. hes not good with medical stuff..so he's likely to be clueless what autism is.
Rigenn Rigenn 18-21, M 13 Answers Dec 17, 2012 in Parenting & Family

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We (all) have one kind of emotional disorder whether we admit it or not. The point is we can live with it even if someone else can't. Believe it or not Autisum leads to the genuis caterory. I for one envy you because my iq is ninety. Want to swap? Even you friend has a emotional (fight/anger) problem. You are even one up on him and all those who are scared of you because you are different because they believe there own fear about those who are different.<br />
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You understand you are a great person and have much to give too others who's ignorance through fear has overtaken them. Keep up the great work you are thinking and doing. Extentialist.

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Perhaps he actually appreciates your willingness to be completely honest and straightforward with him where others would have held back. One of the nice things about Asperger's is that "social brakes" might be lacking and people can be totally blunt. Sometimes that can get them into trouble, but honest communication is so rare that some people really appreciate it.

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for what possible reason considering how people are so biased to mental illness?

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I know what you mean. All you can do is tell him if it does not work out that is something that you deal with there are some out there who will be real it just takes a lot of effort to find them..I know that is frustrating but with time you can learn to deal with it! i say that from experience!

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Number one, you don't tell someone that you just met anything. At this point in time its none of their business. Not trusting someone as soon as you meet them is very smart and will serve you well as you get older ( calling yourself 'paranoid' isn't called for ), to follow your logic I'm 'paranoid' since I trust basicly no-one. If he's in fight's a lot, I would seriously doubt some one else starts them all the time, he sounds like a braggert who runs his mouth a lot. It's alright though, he'll run it to the wrong person one day soon. When he does, he will learn just how 'superior' he is. If he wants to be a friend, let him. As to your trust, I'd wait on that. Trust should not be lightly given away, it should be earned. Let him earn it.

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Why, Thank You. Just telling it the way I see it. I looked up that 'dis-order' &amp; the way they describe it I'd say at 75% of the world has it. Everybody certainly isn't flawlessly co-ordinated ( everyone is a little clumsy sometimes - so what? ) , and I've heard many people make inappropriate comments from time to time. I would also like to add the following. Look up "Desiderata" by Max Ehrmann, read it and pay particular attention to paragraph 2. You can find it here, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desiderata , its on many other sites as well.

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I would definitely tell him. It will help if you say anything else inappropriate. He'll understand you. And I think MOST people with normal intelligence will understand if you explain it clearly. My little girl has autism and it's so mild sometimes people forget, and then she gets stuck repeating words or gets overstimulated and melts down. It helps that all her friends, teachers, and friends' parents know, otherwise they'd probably be impatient or even ugly to her.

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No I don't think you have ruined your friendship, judging on your up-bringing it's bound to be your first reaction. I'm sure he was just kidding what he said in the message. If he does make you say impulsive things, if you really do trust him I would tell him about your autism. First, I would see if I really trust him. You've learned the hard way about back stabbers so keep your eyes and ears open. If you do trust him, tell him, ask him to google it if it doesn't make sense :) He'll have a better understanding of you then :)

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Seriously, I don't think he has what it takes to understand what Asperger Syndrome is. I have a very close friend who has it and they are often misunderstood and called weird. Very sad how some people react. From the sounds of that kid, he sounds like he won't be a very good friend... sorry... it's a bummer

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I think you should tell people if you want. I personally think it is none of their business.<br />
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source:<br />
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Mom to a son almost middle schol age with Autism

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Kick them in the balls. They'll understand.

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No thanks. I am not a violent person.

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