You have to learn to love yourself first
threw horrible catastrophe , remember 9/11 or when a family member dies
You first must learn to love yourself. What helped me a great deal was the book "The Road Less Traveled" by M. Scott Peck.
By serving them unselfishly (that's why your mom loves you so much, btw)
its not a quick fix. you need to evaluate your whole life paradigm.
Learn to love yourself first