How can this disabled man find a girlfriend?
I have been single for a while, I've got loads of good qualities and can even make love, I'm not a pla
17 Answers to "How can this disabled man find a girlfriend?"
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When I was looking online for a companion a couple of years ago, there was this disabled girl from Collier's Wood who kept looking at my profile. I never met her, but she seemed lovely and I would have been up for a meet had she expressed interest. Her username was 'the wheel deal' which I thought was very corny, but apt!
The point is, though, why did she focus on her disability? That comes second, after the person themselves, surely?
I agree with the masked man - drop the 'disabled' tag as an intro, and bring it in later if you get some responses. Once a lady has become your friend, the disability will be a small hurdle. If it isnt, she's not the right person for you anyway!Like (4)
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same way any other man does
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I don't think it's purely because you're disabled, it can be pretty darn hard no matter who you are.
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my fiance was born with kidney problems and literally covered in scars on his body.. he s been really ill and had periods of really well,, i used to be phobic about illness.. he never ever thought he d get with a single mum.. . Literally a month after we met he had mrsa, and spent a week seriously ill.. in my house.It was a baptism of fire.. for the last 6 years i have helped him dialyse four times a week, he s been wiped out, infected, pretty much you name it.. i nearly lost him three times..My son and i adore him, we purposely havent moved in together because both felt it would be unfair to load that on my boy, and too much for us all.. he needed to let son and i have our time together because its not easy.. In Oct i was privileged to be able to donate my kidney to him, he s great, well and fit. He s ow moving in.. with the "Single mum!" and were getting married.. please dont think it wont happen.. Andy feltthe same as you.. people seemed to see the disability.. someone once said to me about Andy s scars "not being pretty"... to me.. and i told him this.. every one of those scxars saved him so we could meet.. and ive never been so awestruck by anyone.. with his strength, humour and sheer zest for life. You will fall in love, and she wont give a toss about anything because she will love YOU.. good luck and hugs xx
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Someone good will come along for you one day, dont worry. Just pray about it, God knows what you need even before you ask! By the way, I'm in a wheelchair too, my friends say that I'm fun to be around and always happy. They like people like this and not someone whos always complaining. So cheer up and start smiling and you will attract that woman you need. God bless !
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Don't wait for someone to give you a chance. Give yourself a chance first, then the rest will follow.
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I know what you mean bro I am tbi myself. You want to be real with people you meet. But I think you should start letting her get to know the real you then just throw your disability in to the works. And If she runs brush it off you don't need a shallow girl anyway.
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I realize that this chain of questions & answers is more than 2 years old, but there seem to be at least a few people who might be qualified to offer advice on MY situation, including the asker of the original question:
I'm an able-bodied woman who recently started dating a man who uses a wheelchair. We haven't been dating very long so I'm still getting to know him, but so far I'm intrigued and open to the possibility of seeing where this goes. (For the record, the wheelchair was not a deterrant for me -- in fact, I'm getting to be pretty kick-*** at getting it folded up and in my car when we go places). He has told me that he also likes me and enjoys my company...but he has a lot of anxiety about dating. We've been on a handful of dates now, and this trepidation has shown in several ways: for instance, he's never tried to kiss me goodnight, or even to hold my hand, even though he's told me I am his type; also, I've driven him home multiple times and we've spent several hours just sitting in my car talking, but he's never invited me in to see his apartment.
Those things can be chalked up to a desire to take things slowly, but recently he admitted that he's intimidated by the prospect of being anyone's 'boyfriend.' This is partly because of some medical issues he's had recently (he hasn't been feeling well or like himself), and also partly because he fears rejection. But he said that in addition to those issues, he actually fears things will go well with me...and he worries he will then screw it up somehow. He's had some admittedly unusual dating experiences, and he's so anxious about this that he's not really sure what he wants right now, and encouraged me to continue seeing other people...but not to rule him out as a prospective partner either.
In the interest of full disclosure, I DO know who I am and what I want, and I definitely don't want to casually date several men at once. If an able-bodied man I was dating was to encourage me to see other people, my first instinct would be that I have better things to do with my time than spend it with him and should move on...but I feel like this situation ought to be handled differently. based on what this man has told me about his life, it seems that he's faced a lot of cruelty and discrimination as a result of his physical situation. If he has fears about relationships and intimacy, perhaps he is justified in having them ba sed on his experiences.
SO my questions are: How do I interpret what he's telling me? Is the anxiety he's feeling something common to physically disabled people in the dating world, or is he unusually tense about this whole process? Should I continue to hope that there might be potential for a relationship with this person, or is this his way of telling me that he's just not that into me? In spite of his request that I not discount the possibility that he and I may eventually become romantic, should I put him in the frieLike (1)
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there could be many reasons for his hesitation but in my personal opinion instead of beating around the bush for your own sanity just be completely honest and ask for the kiss and tell him exactly how you feel because I hope he is not just treating you as if you are only the best he can get in his situation and really he wished he was with someone else. Your feelings are important and it's not nice when your not really wanted. I know I want real affection and not just going through the motions because it's the best I can get. Good luck and thank you for seeing past the chair.
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i am piyus i am single no gf.okkk because i meat with road accident nothing lost but my knee not bend full and 2 inc. leg short . girls allways like smart boy .i want a girl friend any girl plsss 9569758817 camm me thanxx
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YES YOU CAN FIND SOMEONE SPECIAL. THE REASON WHY YOU HAVE NOT FOUND HER YET IS BECAUSE THAT IS A VERY SPECIAL LADY IS SEARCHING FOR YOU AS HARD AS YOU ARE LOOKING FOR HER. WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT TO HAPPEN IT WILL
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i have heard that so many times!! i just want someone to hold.Like (1)
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to anandadas, hang in there buddy, i will say a prayer for you. good luck.
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me too!!! all i get is "i will be your friend". i get so sick of that. friends are nice, but i want someone to kiss, hold, share with, sleep with, and yes for good or bad to get nude with and play with each body. sorry but i a guy too, even if ladies don't know that!!
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Hi there, I am also male and disabled. I think it is more difficult to find someone when you have a disability, I remember being on a dating site, ( until this point I hadnt even thought of myself as disabled, I have a right leg above knee amputation) any way, for some reason a women emailed me, I didnt respond quick enough for her, and she made the comment............ God I cant even pull a one legged man. People ho I told said ignore it, she isnt worth it, however it does hurt, and it does have an impact. Also due to pain and other things, its difficult to get out to places where you may go to find someone. I must admit I think the best answer is Online dating, at least within your profile, you can tell people what you are like, then who ever contacts you, will have no problems with the disability aspect.
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Delete those memories of rejections starting right now. Forget them. Focus now on the woman who's meant to be in your life. Read again the posts and ponder how it could make that meeting start on a cheerful note.
Smile. Keep us updated when you finally meet her, ok?Like (1)
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You will, someone will appreciate your personality. I would have dated someone who had no legs at all, but he didn't ask me, and I was too afraid to ask him....
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Stop being a "disabled man" and focus on being a "nice guy". You're looking for affection, not sympathy.
Sorry if that sounds harsh, but its true and it will work for you.Like (1)
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I've tried all that and the rejection is what is making me a disabled man first. It is a reality and nothing to do with self pity. I can't be bothered with all that self pity stuff. If you knew me you would understand. I am hoping someone might give me some practical advice. Sympathy is something that can be quite patronising and not something I desire. Surely if you understood about disabled people most of us don't want any sentimental rubbish. It isn't the same as normal dating otherwise why would a lady tell me off because they said they like walking. As if this is something we can't do, well my chair is off road but it doesn't climb fences. So according to this woman if you like walking then you can't have a boyfriend in a wheelchair. I've heard it all, someone said to me once "I don't date sick people" and I replied saying I wasn't sick and what made her think that.
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Best Answer (Chosen By Asker):
Posted by iota 1 Jun 8th, 2010 at 2:48PM
Disability should not be a even a question. The right girl will accept your disability. Don't give up. If you are a decent, kind, loving man it will happen. God will determine the time. A few prayers wouldn't hurt. Will say one for you myself. Keep on keeping on.
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