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perseverer perseverer 51-55, F 14 Answers Jul 18, 2011

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the predator will gain your trust first- teachers, religious leaders people with power positions. once you completely trust him then he will give excuses for touching you like .. he cares or you are like his daughter ... he shows physical non sexual affection by asking you to hug him. he also conditions you to fear him by getting angry and displaying his anger... slowly he accidently brushs your breast and touches your vagina area with his feet to see what your reaction would be. then closer to the date of action he tells you- you are special ... comes to you at night and starts with give me a hug u think nothing of it because he has already been hugging you. but you get a shock when he pushes you down and starts kissing you. After a while he stops and when you deny him more he sulks and if you are timid and conditioned to fear and revere and trust him you get scared and give in. And then comes the pain and guilt of not saying no of not being brave of getting your whole world crash as you trusted this person with your life your spirtuality and your body. I curse this man this predator may he die fast and not harm another sexually and have his **** fall off. GO WITH YOUR INSTICNTS ALWAYS FIGHT TILL THE END DO NOT GIVE IN SHOUT DO NOT BE ASHAMED TO SEEK HELP ITS BETTER THAN SUFFERING

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What I've learned about predators and grooming is that it is about making the victim MISTRUST their own perceptions of the world!!! This can be done in many ways, some of the tactics have been discussed already -another one is called NLP. They can also use other methods like controlling the environment of the victim. All of these tactics make the victim and the perp feel like s/he is in control and is defining reality. The second thing they do is try to make the victim dependant on the perp. That's just stuff that I've experienced personally, so that off the top of my head. (In case, you want a world class acedemic answer Margaret Singer is an expert on grooming and mind-control,.)

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This is certainly true of the grooming tactics of gang stalkers and kidnappers. There are also the less noticeable techniques of the child molesters and date rapers. They are all very serious of course.

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Trust your instincts..and go with your feelings..does he creep you out? chances are if youre wondering about him in this area then SOMETHINGS not right..

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I think you are right. At some stage he will give a signal that is definitely crossing the line.

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There will be pre-incident indicators and non verbal communication such as micro ex<x>pressions that will leave signs but best of all follow you intuition. Remember that charm and niceness is only a predator tactic. If you feel uncomfortable and they try to charm you into grooming and especially if you don't know them that well that would be a red flag.

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MiniBryant you said this very well and I totally agree. The question is, how to recognize those micro expressions etc for what they are.

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When he chews off your eyebrows

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oh my gosh thats hilarious..

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that is the best question i read this month. i will tell you he gets to personal with you and ask what your wereing and he trys to put his discusting perverited hand on you, or he treatens you at he harm you if you don,t do sexual things with him. that.s sexual herassment.

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Peter, at the stage of putting his hands on you the abuse has started. The grooming is the behaviour that leads up to him being able to be in such a position. But thank you for appreciating the question.

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When you wait/watch for every word he speaks.<br />
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Predators exist but like all beings cannot defeat the Word. if you are surrounded by the Word, the curse of a predator will become a blessing.

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Someone here please explain: What does "groomed" by a predator mean? Thanks.

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grooming is psychological conditioning that is used by perps that have relationships with their victims. Grooming prepares the victim psychologically for the abuse, it is the last stage before the crime is committed.

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ill take a stab at it.. if a predator has someone in mind that he wants to ..have fun with.. then he cant just kill her, where would the fun be? so he has to slowly come up with the perfect way to torture her..and to get the most pleasure for himself.. so he gets to know her.. gets to know what her likes and dislikes are..finds out what would scare her the most.. gets in good enough with her to where she will trust him when he takes her off to some secluded place to execute his plan. that would all be an example of grooming .idont know trying to paint a picture but i might be off, then again, im not a predator.. but it would be everything the guy did before actually killing or torturing the girl. the whole process leading up to it. you groom a dog to look and act how you want. and hes going to want to her be looking just as he wants, and acting justlike he wants..when he finally carries out his plan.. or hes failed himself. so he grooms her. to be exactly as he pleases. whatever that entails i guess, physically or psychologically.

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I agree with both solia and kindhearted713 but I think there is something else that needs to be added. The perpetrator makes the victim and her family comfortable with his intrusion into her life gradually over a period of time. He makes himself trusted by her and her family and friends. He gradually spends more of his time and money on her. Inappropriate behaviours might be extremely slight and ambiguous at first. But ultimately the intention is to take advantage of the victim.

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sounds like a typical relationship.. lol

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