How can you tell when your partner is being unfaithful?

The truth of it all is sometimes you just don't know! Some people are very good liars and get away with things, because they plan and cover all grounds.

But having said that, there are some things to watch out for..
Number one rule always listen to your gut feeling!intuition (gut feeling) that something is not right usually is a sign you may have a cheating problem "when in doubt check them out".



Grooming habits will change. Cheaters will be more attentive to their person (e.i. the way they dress, frequent bathing, physical fitness, grooming of their hair, switching of colognes, etc...).

At the beginning of an affair the mate that is cheating is more attentive to his spouse. This is due to guilt that the cheater may be feeling at the time.

Mutual friends start acting strangely toward you. (They either know about the cheating or have been told stories about what a horrible wife or girlfriend you are.)

Your cheating husband or wife stops confiding in you and seeking advice from you.

Sets up a new e-mail account and doesn't tell you about it.

He leaves the house in the morning smelling like Irish Spring and returns in the evening smelling like Safeguard.

He joins the gym and begins a rigorous workout program.

He buys a cell phone and doesn't let you know.

He sets up a separate cell phone account that is billed to his office.

The cheating husband carries condoms, and you are on the pill.

Begins to delete all incoming phone calls from the caller ID.

Deletes all incoming e-mails when they used to accumulate.

He becomes "accusatory," asking if you are being true to him, usually out of guilt.

Raises hypothetical questions such as, "Do you think it's possible to love more than one person at a time?"

He buys himself new underwear, new clothes, new cologne.

He insists the child seat, toys, etc., are kept out of his car.

The cheating spouse stops wearing her wedding ring.

Has a sudden desire to be helpful with the laundry.

Has unexplained scratches or bruises on his or her neck or back.

Suddenly wants to try new love techniques.

He/she fairly suddenly stops having sex with you.

He/she suddenly wants more sex, more often.

Supposedly works a lot of overtime, but it never shows up on the pay stub.

Picks fights in order to stomp out of the house.

You find out by accident he or she took vacation day or personal time off from work - but supposedly worked on those days.

Shows a sudden interest in a different type of music.

Spouse's co-workers are uncomfortable in your presence.

Has a sudden preoccupation with his or her appearance.

Spends an excessive amount of time on the computer, especially after you have gone to bed.

He throws up a lot because he just ate at his mistress's house and had to eat the dinner you prepared when he got home.

Your spouse is away from home, either nights or on trips, more than previously.

His/her clothes smell of an unfamiliar perfume or after-shave. You see lipstick on your husband's shirt.

The amount of money being deposited into your checking account drops off.

You find items of intimate apparel or other small gift-type items that you did not give your spouse.

Your spouse seems less comfortable around you and is "touchy" and easily moved to anger.

You get calls where the caller hangs up when he or she hears your voice.

He/she loses attention in the activities in the home.

Your intuition (gut feeling) tells you that something is not right.

He/she has a definite change in attitude towards everyone in the home.

They use a low voice or whisper on the phone or hangs up quickly.

Atypical erratic behavior.

He sneaks out of the house.

Honey I'll be honest with you...we women have strong intuition and if you really listen to it...it will rarely steer you wrong! It doesn't sound good. He could have invited you to meet him and his friends wherever they were going. If he keeps his friends separate from you, that's not a good sign.
Next time he goes out ask him if you can meet him there. If he makes excuses so as not to invite you...then dump him! Because the question isn't whether he's actually cheating but that he's not putting you first!

Maybe your letting your insecurities run away with you. He didnt have to tell you that she was going to be there. He could have said he was going with the guys. When you told him that this would upset you ,this was enough to make him go because he felt you didnt trust him and right away you hit his manly ego. I probably would have said "ok, call me later, have a good time". That would have shocked him but would have probably made him love you more because you trusted him. It would also have shown him that you have some self esteem in that if anything was going on you would not tolerate it. Jealousy is not good. It can eat at the soul and believe me you wont win in the end. How was he after that? Good luck!!!

Not true at all. To ask it could be something inherit in you. May have nothing to do with your partner. People get false or paranoid thoughts and feeling all the time, more over often times are wrong and make things way worse than they had to be. Be fair, and logical ladies. Secondly; despite what movies, tv shows, and Dr Phil say, the best way to find out is to pay attention. Then assess, then when the time is right or a point has been reached, open the issue up. How all this goes and to what degree is all on you.

Etoo...Hmm >__< I dont think you're jealous but he shouldnt do that to you but then again his your boyfriend silly you have to trust him =3 && Maybe at the end he only loved you ^__^

I agree with Sela and you can just feel it inside. I'm sorry, sister.

He or she will pick arguments with you,accuse you of cheating,be extra jealous of you because of guilt! Trust me I never believed it but its true signs

I won't comment on your specific situation, because I don't know you, and really don't know your boyfriend either.

But surefire signs of disinterest from guys are lack of communication, lack of interest in sex with the gal of their affection, a tendency to be unavailable at every possible opportunity, and pretty much anything that makes it seem as if he's avoiding you or trying to hide something, especially if our words sound a little peculiar when it comes to normal average things couples do together.

Try to be intimate when he gets home. This way, you will be able to have an excuse to see what kind of new smells that he has on him. If he smells like a foreign soap.... well, I am sure that he didn't take a shower at the bar, right? If he smells like anything else,( perfume, etc) you may have your answer.

well i belive that a true partner can never be unfaithful..
unfaithfulness and Partner are two different things..

The whole thing is alarming, and completely WRONG. Always trust your instincts. If my husband did that to me then I'd have his stuff thrown in the street, and he could have her for good. Sounds like he has his cake and eats it too. What a JERK.

well,i wouldnt like it either..if i knew where they were,id get dressed up ,go down there and say,"hey,i thought id join you" let them know whos boss!

you know.
it may take time to sink in and you may conciously deny it but you just know.

If your partner is being inappropriately thoughtful, sensitive, loving, and considerate - he/she/it is being unfaithful.

They are all right. Unfortunately, it had to happen. It has to be a mutual respect, trust and honest relationship. Other wise the relationship won't ever work out. Sorry he did this to you. Nobody deserves it.

You are definitely not in the wrong to be feeling the way you are feeling, or being "too jealous" the way you put it. Of course you're going to be upset! One thing my husband and I have always stood by: if we're going to go out for drinks, like to a bar or something, we go with one another, we don't just go out alone or with the opposite sex and say "it's just a friend." I mean, of course I've gone out with my best friend a time or two without my husband...but you know what? I don't even want to go without him, and he doesn't want to go without me, that's how it should be! Listen to your gut on this one - don't let your denial, or any outside influences, or a lying partner - don't let these things distract you from your INNER VOICE. Your insticts are telling you what's going on, that's why your stomach knotted up right away when this whole thing first started, and your partner first started spending time with this new "friend" of his. You deserve a whole lot better than this, and deep down, I think you know that! Trust and believe in you...it will lead you to what you deserve, (true love) in the long run.

The answer to this one is simple: one wanders off when the interest drops. No one feels obliged to stay in a relationship that has gone belly-up. We've seen it happen in earlier generations and the results stink. This fellow is simply looking for what's missing at home. A mistake was made and is now being corrected. If there's any fault involved it's both parties not being sufficiently aware of the shortcomings of this particular match. It's a dead duck. Time to face the facts and move on. Maturity is about the only thing that helps to avoid this sort of thing.

i think ur being pretty justified,if i was u i'd just tell him striaght out one day,"hey, i got the feeling u may b cheating and i wont be mad just tell me the truth....please" nd if he still wont talk id probley tell him"if u cared about me u'd have an anwser, and it'd b the truth...(pasuse)...its over i care about u nd i guess u dont feel the same...i hope shes worth it " then id leave or kick him out lol :)
but thats just me.

HE IS CHEATING OR GETTING READY TO CHEAT ON YOU. It is either her or one of her friends. The biggest red flag is ANY CHANGE IN HIS BEHAVIOUR WHATSOEVER, for example; taking showers at different times of the day, coming home late, being meaner to you than usual, being nicer to you than usual, being overly critical (this is him comparing you to her, and you coming up short), smelling of perfume, or any unusual smell, a sudden attitude change about your relationship, or little comments about friends of his who have cheated and how he doesn't really think it is that big a deal. Hair style changes, buying new clothes, buying you gifts, money missing that he can't account for, spending more time on the internet than usual, getting a new mobile phone, sudden outbursts of anger, shortness of temper. Changes in your sex life, changes in how he makes love to you. The list goes on and on and on...
Once it comes out you will look back on it and see all of the signs really clearly.

I really hope I am wrong as it is very painful if it does happen. All the best and good luck :)

Just because you're paranoid, don't mean thier not after you...