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What advice, recommendations, books, websites, etc do you guys have to help me? I can't afford therapy though. My fears seem to run my life and ruin my confidence but I can't overcome them. I have accomplished a lot with college and school (clubs, leadership roles, high honors, scholarships, etc) and I am 10 years older than when these issues began yet I haven't overcome or outgrown my confidence issues. If anything they are worse. I am insecure about the way I look, walk, and talk. I feel that "dumber" kids with more confidence will do better in the jobs I qualify for than I will (straight A's). I feel I am not deserving of opportunities (like I am a lesser person). I have a huge problem talking to women. I have never been able to flirt, hold a conversation, or maintain eye contact with girls I like (due to fear). My poor confidence is going to limit my career and romance opportunities. I want to reach for the stars, but as it is now my confidence will have me laying in the mud.
FindingSmiles FindingSmiles 22-25, M 8 Answers Mar 11, 2012

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think positve about yourself, im serious. no negative thoughts. You WILL make mistakes but thats how everyone is. Dont worry about what people think of you. People already in life hate you or like you automatically. Its gonna be that way. To overcome fear, is to approach that fear and go through it willingly, no matter what the outcome is. No one can help you but yourself, you have to go through it. It is hard but thats how life is. You cant be afraid of failing, thats what keep alot of people from greatness. MY FRIEND YOU CAN DO IT!!!!! greatness can not be achieved without struggle.

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Wow! Boy did you get that right.

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preciate it!

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I agree with Garnet. Excellent response!

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thank you

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walk with your head held high. walk fast to look like your busy and have something important to attend. completely step out of your comfort zone when it comes to meeting new people...be the first to introduce yourself. Compliment yourself all the time whether you believe it or not...after a while you will subconsciously start believing it. Hence the better you feel about yourself, the more confident you become. I went to drama for 5 years...totally stepping out of my comfort zone...having to meet new people who were so confident...so up themselves...but you have to do it! Just love yourself! learn to! I don't care if you hate everything about yourself because form now on your going to love it all!

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Im really good at helping ppl with things like this. I have helped people over come crippling fears. Im a safe person. But if you want the quick fix, think of it as acting. Know your lines and say them at right time. Thats how most ppl go thru life. Not many ppl are ever sincere.

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You need to just face your fear. Force yourself to do things and talk to people you are afraid to talk to. Remove people from your life who feed your insecurities. Hang out with confident, positive people. Don't seek support from other insecure people. They can't help you - they haven't even helped themselves yet! <br />
If something is hard, the way to make it easier is to simply do it more. <br />
I've been working on my confidence a lot over the last couple of years and I'm not totally there yet, but I have improved no end in my confidence levels so if you feel like talking about it, don't hesitate to chuck me a message. :) <br />
Good luck.

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stop thinking about yourself for a start. egotistical obsession with one's mental and emotional well-being only leads to more stress and more negativity. if you are serious about changing your life for the better i recommend learning toltec wisdom. i don't go around preaching this stuff to people very lightly so if you're religious then this probably won't help you much, but if not, this wisdom may just change your world. <br />
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i am assuming you're a man ba<x>sed on your info in this question so i recommend any books by Carlos Castaneda. good luck.

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be in controll of your brain your positive thoughts of where u want to go that is positive in this life...all positive things that u think of yourself...its hard to block out all things annoying and how people might act towards you if they dont like u...but ignore the non-sense...become alergic to bull-****....u can do it..it takes hard work but becomes easier w practice..keep ur cool and stay optomistic..if a bad situation happen see the good in it..us and recycle..

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I see that you write very well, and I get the feeling that you are intelligent....I agree with msdklove and mr141149, wake up tomorrow thinking that this is the first day of your new life, and go make it happen! At first it will be difficult to remember, but just keep believing! Can you check into performing in local plays, or take a fun class somewhere?

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