How do I fix myself?

My mind is broken. It has been broken for a long time and I can't remember what it was like when it was whole. Sometimes the world just goes all strange and I don't know what's real anymore, if anything is real. My thoughts speed up and hurl themselves around inside my head and I can't grab hold of one; I can't isolate them from each other, it's just noise. I get so confused and afraid. I have been trying for so long, so hard, to put it back together. I just don't know what to do. I am terribly afraid of living like this for decades. I am so afraid that I think of killing myself often - the only thing is that death scares me more. I have nightmares.

I'm wide open to suggestions. I won't discount anything. Except Jesus - don't suggest him, please. I need help and am asking for it so please, tell me anything you can think of.

[A couple of hours later] Thank you so much to everyone who has replied. Each of you has made a difference. Being heard makes a difference.

Posted 5 months ago

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ElLagarto

Best Answer

I'm with Jenny. As a long-time Bipolar bear, I can tell you that the illness is very treatable. But whatever it is you've got - GET HELP. A therapist, meds, counseling, self-education, etc. You don't need to live this way.

Posted 5 months ago

Other 9 Answers to How do I fix myself?

jennyone	Posted Jun 6th, 2009 at 3:09PM It sounds to me as if you may have a form of bipolar disorder - otherwise known as manic depression. The symptoms you report are very typical of someone entering the "mania" phase. Fractured thoughts and everything running at turbo speed... It isn't possible for anyone to make an accurate diagnosis without seeing you and I'm not a doctor, just someone who takes an interest in such things. So the really important thing is that YOU MUST go and see a doctor and get yourself refered to a proper specialist. DON'T WORRY - you aren't going to be locked up - you aren't crazy. It's just a simple chemical imbalance in the brain and it CAN be treated with the right medicines - so please go and seek medical help. Rated: +4Vote for this!
ExpectingDisaster	Posted Jun 6th, 2009 at 4:19AM You need to find a "grounder" to reality. If I were you I would start with seeing a therapist. Have faith, you will get better! Rated: +2Vote for this!
amandolisempre	Posted Jun 6th, 2009 at 8:24AM I know exactly what you mean. I'm going through the same stuff right now. I have a therapist but it feels like its going no where. She suggested religion and I just lost all respect for her. I'm not religious and I don't plan to be. I don't really have a suggestion for you, but wanted to tell you I can be someone to talk to if you need to just vent. I'm feeling more and more overwhelmed and out of control myself each day and talking it out helps sometimes..... I wish you the best of luck Rated: +2Vote for this!
tearaway	Posted Jun 7th, 2009 at 2:06PM I think you should learn how to meditate. The mind is like a wild tiger, for wont of a better simile. Meditating will let you come to grips with the speed and fragmented feeling. Make sure you have somewhere comfortable to sit. Rated: +2Vote for this!
everton13	Posted Jun 6th, 2009 at 4:08AM Please go and seek professional help urgently. Rated: +1Vote for this!
NowSure	Posted Jun 6th, 2009 at 4:20AM Suggestion of therapy a good one and already here. I would also like to suggest something so very simple and so often overlooked - have you looked at your diet / nutrition? Many diagnosable mental illnesses are treatable with better nutrition, believe it or not - your good fats, vitamins, especially B group etc etc. Give it a go, it cant hurt. And all the best with it all :) Rated: +1Vote for this!
hurldog	Posted Jun 6th, 2009 at 8:28AM Tell your doctor. I used to get the "swirlies" myself. Zoloft did wonders for me. I only took it for 6 months, 10 years ago and haven't had a relapse since. Good luck. Rated: +1Vote for this!
dotan	Posted Jun 6th, 2009 at 10:53AM don't pay attention on it much adjyo... you are still a normal person and please believe so.. Rated: +1Vote for this!
asiamtoday	Posted Jun 6th, 2009 at 10:59AM Please don't jump to the pills to fix your problems. Talk to some one for sure but exhaust your options first before expected a pill to magically fix you. It's like any thing that is worth anything you have to work hard for it. Meditate, go out side get some fresh air, exercise, eat well, focus on family, laugh with your friends, even though you don't feel like it... Take it one day at a time... You'll look back on your progress and be proud you came so far. It's not about loosing sight in the night but rather the journey to finding the light. Good luck.... Rated: +1Vote for this!

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