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She started doing this 1 year ago. She has seen a ped gastro Dr and a counselor. Gastro said nothing wrong counselor said stress. We told her she couldn't go to the amusement park if she pooped her pants in the 2 weeks before. She made it without any accidents. Then we told her she couldn't play soccer if she went in her pants. She went a little over 2 months without any accidents. The day after she started soccer it started again. So I am making her quit soccer. I don't know what to do anymore! I know she can go without pooping her pants she proved that with going over 2 months. Any help with be greatly appreciated!!
julee4 julee4 31-35, F 22 Answers Sep 2, 2012 in Motherhood

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rub her nose in it

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too quick... ;)

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I plead the fifth.

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AHHH I know exactly what you can do for this. This was determined to be a form of control on the childs part. As if the child felt totally controlled by everyone else in their life. A friend of mine had this problem with an 11 year old boy and they fixed it.<br />
All you have to do is take her into the bathroom and give her the soiled clothing to clean out by hand. <br />
Then make her wash, dry, fold and put them away.<br />
After a couple times of having to deal with the poo on her own hands she will not want to make the mess any more.<br />
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Then you tell her that SHE HAS CONTROL over this and if she does not want to clean the poo, then she can prevent it herself. It is in HER control to do so.

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That was exactly what I was going to suggest.

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A good hard OTK spanking would be a lot more educational than the mamby-pamby "can't do this or that" silliness you have been trying. And then give her an full quart enema every morning for a week. That will both embarrass her and ensure she can't poop for the rest of the day.

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giving a child an enema would probably be considered child abuse.Also suggesting a good hard spanking in addition to it, makes me very disturbed by you.

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Its not my child who is suffering from a lack of effective parenting. Deal with real life.

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denying her interests is avoidance, not a solution. teaching her to schedule her bowel movements at a time before likely conflict times will perhaps eliminate some of the mishaps. the structure of pre-disruption of the potentials may turn out to be a form of control that will help her deal with it. obviously desire of a significant goal worked, so desire to make the structured control work may turn into a daily reinforcement and reduce the risks of mishap.

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I would suggest that you see a counselor. If one counselor is ineffective, see another one. Saying it is 'stress ' is not helpful unless they can help her with it.<br />
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If you can't afford one, maybe her school can help or you can visit a local college or get help from you church.<br />
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But this is not a healthy behavior and if the kids at school found out...her life would be miserable.

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Assuming it's not associated with a medical problem or abuse, maybe just leave her around other 7-year olds; they're bound to notice and maybe peer pressure will have some effect. I don't know if that would work, but it's all I can think of. :(

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make her hand wash them in a bucket in the back yard....you make the mess you clean it up

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Don't make her quit soccer.. If she can control it as you seem to impy, the social pressures of having to work with a group of same age children will actually be much better than you telling her and punishing her.

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imply, not impy

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If it is stress induced, you need to find the source of the stress. You really need to, 7 year olds shouldn't have stress.

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We moved to 3 hours from where she started school and it is a school 10x the size of the old school.

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Then there is something about school, I think you trying to tell me. Or the counsellor told you. If it is, talk with her teacher, find out about bullying. If the counsellor didn't give an indication about the source of stress, go back, and try to find out. Also, try not to punish her, but reward her for not pooping in her pants. There is something serious going on, and it needs to be found, and dealt with.

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if you know what's causing the stress why not do something about that rather than punishing her for not being able to cope?

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something around the house is making her nurvous

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make her do her own washing

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haha.... idk.

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its fun let her enjoy it

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