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Stronglylovingtaurean Stronglylovingtaurean 41-45, F 11 Answers Sep 30, 2011

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I am in the same boat and we broke up two+ weeks ago. We would run together, lift weights together, cook together, and clean up together so that we could be together that much sooner. We used to have sex 1, 2, 3 times throughout a night that we were together. She would lay on my lap for hours and I would play with her hair or something like that and we would say absolutley nothing to each other and be absolutely content. When we sleep together we would have to be touching and her favorite place was her face in between my neck and shoulder. She told me that once upon a time she didn't respect a sensitive guy, she would tell him to get on his side of the bed, ... I had insecurity issues and didn't know how to deal with the relationship she had with her husband. Yes, still married after a year of us being together. Parties together...the three of us...drinking. I would be on the back burner when that happened. She had defensiveness issues and when I would poke at her with my insecurity, she would start swinging and this happened a lot. I get that I was wrong, but two do not make a right. I get that it is still early in the process, but I can not get her out of my head! I won't even mention her daughter's issues. I keep trying to tell myself all of the things that are wrong and that I shouldn't be there right now, but my emotions get the best of me. I fell in love the first time I saw her and we actually did meet 25 years earlier when she didn't live in my city. She does now... I'm empty and lost!

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If he is your soulmate then my feeling is that he would want you to be happy, I expect the last thing he would want you to be doing is pining after him, he would know that life is too short, and would probably tell you that and to pleasea find happiness. I really wish you all the best.

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I can really relate to this. I have been divorced for 8 years. In my head, I still go back to that place when we were together. I've dated, been proposed to, had new experiences, done years of therapy...and when I go to sleep at night I still want to say goodnight to him. He has clearly moved on. Why can't I?

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Yup. move on.

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Once you taste the sweetness of love You may never get over the soulmate. You have to take one step back and just be friends for life. Keep the friend and prioritize your effort with someone else.

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He told me he would love to be friends but that his girlfriend wouldn't understand...... I responded, "I respect that especially when you and I have soooo much hstory it would be hard tor us to remain JUST friends....."
If I cannot get over him I may have to grow old alone. I don't wan tto do that because I have so much love to give. I can make it look easy to move on, outwardly at least, and maybe even date, but how is that fair to any potential suitor when my heart is unavailable???

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Hmm....maybe getting out there and meeting new people will help you get to the point of getting over him. How do you even know he's your soul mate?

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I know he is my soul mate as we have such a strong connection that certain things happen when I know he is thinking about me. This event will reoccur with increasing frequency until he contacts me. This has happened over 6+ years w/o fail. It used to freak me out but I have learned to accept it, knowing our connection is that strong.
Also, when I am with him, my heart is at home. It is like the world is right no matter what is going on around me/us. Point in fact when I saw him not two months ago and it was like it was just us......
It is everything that stupid love songs are made of.... he is the only man who had made my heart sing...
It is trying with EVERY fibre of my being to let go and NOT being able to despite even having been engaged to another man because I thought and fought and fooled myself that I could move on......

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I think the connection you have with him is all intuition. Plus the longer your with someone I think that intuition gets stronger (I hope I'm using the right word here....if not I hope you understand what I mean). For example I've been with my bf for about 4 years now---it'll be 5 years in January, and I find that I can forsee sometimes when he's calling me and he does---well he doesn't sense these things like me. So would you tell me that we're not meant to be because of that? You shouldn't dwell on this man if doesn't want to be with you. You just gotta accept it or else you could annoy him away. Also why did you two even break it off? It would help to know so I know better what I'm talking about.

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Your just not trying - hike the skirt - drop the blouse line and hit the club

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The only man I want to drop my blouse for, among other things..... is HIM...

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:( Acceptance I guess? I need some help in this department as well....

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If you would like a sounding board feel free to email me and perhaps I can offer you some advice.

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thank you.....

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