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My daughter is 15 and has been seeing this boy for about 9 months. I've noticed some red flags and I'm concerned. He doesn't like it when she talks to any of her guy friends or even some of her girlfriends. He gets mad at her for looking ,speaking and hugging her guy friends. She cries when he gets upset with her over this. I know this is not healthy and she needs to recognize this is a form of abuse. I see a difference in my once free spirited daughter. I could really use some insite on this matter, Thx.
lesariel lesariel 31-35, F 19 Answers Nov 16, 2012 in First Love

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I have dealt with this,,not much u can do,it s life lesson,she has to learn on her own:(

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Unfortunately ...u r right

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Its so hard to accept that its the truth :(....

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oh,i know trust me,now she is 18 and packed her stuff and moved 3k miles away.She is in nursing school and works full time,3 years ago,she was dating a pot smoking guy that looked like a serial killer,lol,she grew outta it:)

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I sure hope my daughter will see what everyone else sees. Thank you so much.

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she will,i think from what i see,she has a good mother,and later,she will realize that what u said ,was to help her:)

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I'm thinking she likes it . if i was the dad I'd meet the boy out in front of the house and take him for a ride and make him an offer he cant refuse

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Trust me, her daddy wants to.

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I wish I was a friend of the family

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My daughter couldn't see it at 16 when she fell in love with an immature self-centered little boy, he was the big football hero in town. Whatever her mother and I said or did, failed, she just did not see him for what he was. She married him at 18 (they lived with me in LA and went to college together) and she spent 15 years of emotional hell before divorcing him at long last. Married an incredibly wonderful man and recently said to me. "Now that I know how a man is supposed to treat someone they love, how can I have been so stupid?" good luck, to you

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This is something you have to approach with caution,as the more you go on about this to her the more she will be drawn to him,the only thing i would do myself in this situation is talk with my kid and express my concerns about this boy,let her know you are there for her if she needs to talk,and most of all try encourage her to spend time with her friends,hopefully in time this phase of giving a **** about this boy will pass,good luck to you :)

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She'll probably never see what you see - and the sad part is that she might even push you away further - make sure you have compassion & understanding!

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Definitely controlling or too loving but most likely controlling

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To answer yur question ....Im sure shes ALREADY aware of it , but she wont LEAVE him , cuz she LOVES him ...unfortunately , this is a NO WIN situation ...Im sure this explanation didnt help AT ALL ..did it ..lol

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Actually, I agree with you...Thank you for your insite :)

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Yur welcome ..good luck with yur daughter ..( breaks my heart that shes CRYING about this :[ ...)

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Mine too....I feel like if I dont help her, then she will repeat my mistakes. I really appreciate it. :)

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Anytime

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I have no reply to this, but having a daughter around the same age i just want to go through the replies to get an insight.

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Your more than welcome to :)

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You can't reason with emotions. She probably loves this guy, so it's not going to be easy... you can only point out,



"You used to be so happy and free-spirited." and "I don't want to see your friendships fall apart because your boyfriend doesn't like you having close friends. That must make you sad, right?" with another "honey, you don't need to live the way he wants you to. I love who you are, and he doesn't seem to accept your healthy choices to communicate with people you love."

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But I Love Him: Protecting Your Teen Daughter from Controlling, Abusive Dating Relationships [Bargain Price] [Paperback]

Jill Murray (Author)

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Considering you were pregnant at her age, I imagine it is going to be quite difficult, how about delegate this on to her father or uncle. A man can tell her all the trick to watch out for.

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Have him tell her that he is.

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