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kittikatti kittikatti 13-15, F 22 Answers Jan 4, 2013 in Health

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can you do me a favor? you don't have to tell her but can you tell her you need a counselor? i did the same thing at 14. so i asked my parents for a counselor and told her instead and she helpoed me tell my parents. its really importantb honey. you may not love yourself right now but do it for the love of your mother.

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did your parents find out why u saw the counselor? like did he/she tell them?

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My mom found out and she sat down and talked to me and I promised I would stop, then one day u was called a ***** by a lot of people and I tried to commit suicide I took 28 pain killers and then I nothing happened so k cut my wrist and then I passed out non the floor my mom came in and called the ambulance I went to the hospital got stitches and then got my stomach pumped and I had to stay at a teen suicide facility for a week and now I'm in counseling and I take anti depressants. You should try talking to someone I'm always here so you can talk to me and trust me there is nothing wrong with not being okay.

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thank you so much. do anti-depressents work?

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The thing is.. I was a cutter and currently still am. Wanna know the reason I stopped..? Well the thing is I have a daughter basically. My sweet baby. And she's 6. She read me and her other Mommas messages(I'm no lesbo were not dating) and she saw u I cut. And make me promise not to cut. She told me it hurts her more than it hurts me when I do it. And now I'm going to try to stop becuz I figured out whenever I cut she feels the pain. 2 nights ago she woke up at 4am at where she is (three states away) and was a screaming and crying mommy mommy mommy mommy hurting!!!! She could feel I was cutting myself. She feels when my cuts hurts. Sounds impossible but it's not. But my pound is u have to find that someone that u know if u cut it will kill them. Absolutely kill them inside. I know your not the happiest right now trust me neither am I but first u need to help yourself and stop cutting. When you stop cutting u need to stop cutting for yourself. Because YOU want to stop. Not anyone else. Just you. U have to want to stop cutting. If u don't do it for you then you won't be able to stop. So do it for you and another person. Maybe it's your mom,girlfriend,best friend. If u talk to me about it I can try to help. But honestly if u really ever need someone I am always on. *Hugs*

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thank you so much<3

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I'm 22; I haven't cut myself in about four years. I started when I was around 13. I still have scars; it sucks having to take them into consideration now, but that's life.



Most people tend to outgrow the urge to self-injure a few years after they begin, so I've read. Depending on what's going on in your life, the desire to harm yourself could be coming from a perfectly reasonable place. If suicide isn't your goal, you're probably just enjoying the endorphin release created by the physical pain. It blocks out mental noise quite effectively.



If you were older, I might recommend smoking a joint. But you're young, so tell your mom. Or a teacher. Or a counselor. Try not to let them totally pathologize you. You're probably not as nuts as you or anyone else thinks you are; you're likely on the path to a perfectly normal adulthood.



Just hold on. It WILL get better.

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i used to drink instead of cut but i recently quit. thanks, that was helpful to hear:)

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Cutting is a lot easier on your body than drinking. My mom died of liver disease. Her arms were beautiful, but her innards were completely wrecked.
Congrats on kicking the habit! You'll love yourself for it later. <3

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I'm lucky enough to be working in social services. I think my scars are helpful in the sense that they break down barriers between me and the people I'm talking to; they make me more accessible to people with emotional problems because they can see I've had them, too.
That said... sometimes people can be cruel, and some situations aren't scar-friendly. Navigating those sucks!

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Hey baby listen to me. You are not worth hear ding your self trust me I've been down this road and all they leave is ugly scars you are worth something and I promise you are, sometimes life gets really hard and you just wann a give up but trust me on give up T's not worth it. Stay strong beautiful <3

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thank you<3

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Your welcome baby ! Anytime you inbox me if you need anything

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It's not easy to stop, believe me. But... it can be done. If you need to talk to someone, I'm here, too. You have to WANT to get better; it's hard. But it's worth it.

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i do want to. i hate having to do this to myself, but every time i try to stop it gets worse. can you stop without help from family or friends?

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if that's how you feel about your mom, then why do you do it?

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to cope with all the other **** in life that we all go through. im just not strong enough to go through it without something to help me, like selfharm

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What about sports or music? Don't tell me there's no way you can do either. If you're wily or devious enough to wanna hide cutting from your mom you should be able to figure out a way to do more constructive things.

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Give up doesn't always mean your weeks sometimes your just strong enough t let go

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Im in chorus and im currently the leader in a masonic youth organization called jobs daughters. i love that organization more then anything besides my mom and the kids in it with me are like family. it stresses me out a lot because of the things i do for it, whhich is part of the reason i cut, but it is really good for me. im definitely a very social person to.

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Then you need to let go of something. Yes you need to learn to handle stress but not by cutting.

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Hey the same thing happened to me too. Same with The1ginger if you need to talk there are people here.

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thanks.. i really appreciate it..did you stop?

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I think hiding them from your parents would hurt them more than knowing how much you need help right now.

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i just dont want to hurt my mom by telling her i need help

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Telling her you need help will give her more peace of mind than you trying to bear the burden alone.

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she wont have to know that i ever did this though

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Maybe you could ask your mom to visit a counselor. If its serious the counselor might let your parents know what your going through. If you just want to hid it Foundation helps... Hope you stop cutting soon.. xx

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why doing it if it will kill your mom... if you really love your mom....

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to cope with everything else

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there are lot of ways to cope with things darling....

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i didnt say it was the best

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I was the same. I just started wearing long sleeve tops and pants ALL THE TIME. Yes, for years, 7yrs in fact. You need to find an excuse to wear them all the time tho (esp in HOT weather) I used to just make up that i hated sunlight on my skin (which wasnt so strange as i was going through a emo/goth phase) but over time you will find a reason to stop. good luck x

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thats a really good idea, thanks, i burn easily so i can use that. thanks!

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Thats ok.. i cant go on your profile or msg you.. but if you want to chat to me or need someone to talk to dont hesitate to msg me x

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you need help..now. Your parents also need to know. Whatever the hurt they feel now won't be as bad as the pain of burying you in the future. This leads to other things.

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I know it tends to lead to that but in my case i sincerly dont think it will. i attempted suicide before and ive since then come to realize all the things i have to live for and i never will try that kind of thing again. in fact when i feel suicidal, i cut and the feeling goes away

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you still need help..it's not a way to cope with the stress of life..and believe me..that stress gets worse as you get older. More responsibilites. Please seek help. You can learn new coping skills.

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i know i do. i just dont want to get it:

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that my girl, is something i don't understand. Do you enjoy being "the victim" ?

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not at all. i just mean i dont want people to find out. i dont like accepting help either, i feel weak, just like i dont like people knowing i need help. im the conselour, shoulder to cry on ectect for all of my friends and my mom. i hate being the one crying.

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sometimes we all have to do things we don't want to do..just to make our lives better. You'll need to be brave.

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If u really DID love your mom ...u wouldn't b CUTTING

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i cut to cope with other things. and its kinda a cycle because i also cut because i feel bad that i cut

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I don't care WHAT your reasoning is.... there's NO excuse for it, & I'm certainly NOT gonna help u cover it up so u can KEEP doing it

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I know theres no excuse. i was just telling you why i did it because u seemed to think it was because of negative feelings towards my mom, which it is not

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If you love her so much then why dont you talk to her so you can get help? You think her not knowing now will make her feel better when she finds out 5 or 10 years down the road and she feels guilty because she didn't see the signs and she didn't help you all those years?

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because i dont want to hurt her in the first place. and i dont plan on telling her in 5-10 years

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U can't hide it FOREVER kid.. & your mom WILL find out.. EVENTUALLY, & then she'll b hurt even WORSE, without U doing a THING

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i can try

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Thanks RQCK, that was kind of my point. As a parent I was very upset when my daughter told me she was cutting but it gave a chance to talk about it and find out how to get her help before it went on for years. I wish you all the best Kitti.

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thanks

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You know, I agree with ThisSpaceForRent, I think that your mom SHOULD find out. Hiding them will only allow you to do it more and hide it for longer.



You know..there are more way to cope with pain than to do that.

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my mom has been through so much. i hold her when she cries, and my stepdad is deployed overseas right now, she needs my brother and i to be strong. im cutting less, which is a start, but quitting is really hard and overwhelming for me.

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hm..well it's not the best thing to do but use a rubber band. I know it's still self harm but at least you won't have massive cuts all over and for the record, you should probably seek a therapist. I'm not saying your sick in the head or anything, I'm just saying that at a time like this, if you're cutting and your mom is going through a lot, maybe family therapy or even just you. Just so you can go out and vent to someone without the worry of people rejecting you so much. This way, you can vent healthily with a lot of support and you can stop cutting as well as being strong for your mom. It's really not a bad thing, at all, cause honestly, scars stay with you for the rest of your life, whether you think so or not. Believe me. I made cuts on my hands in grade 9 and the scars are still there.

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ill try that.. thank you! and i know that talking to someone will help, i just want to avoid hurting my mom. which im aware sounds naive, dumb ect but i just cant help wanting to do whatever i can to keep my mom from breaking down anymore

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no, no, I understand. When I used to do it, I had to avoid everyone as well and well, any way I did, it would work for a bit but someone would always find out. There where things I couldn't do just to avoid anyone seeing it, like going swimming. I did get help and im a lot better now..you kinda just learn how to accept them after awhile but either way, it's not good if you do it a lot. It's only a temporary solution that turns into an addiction and that is the worst possible direction you can go in. It's better just to find help and the best thing about it is that your friends don't have to know if you don't want to tell them.

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i know what you mean. like i cant hide it in gym. im trying to find a therapist that doesnt need my parents. thanks

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no problem. You could try the school councilors. they could probably help.

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ive thought about it but im pretty sure they tell your parents

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You're in good hands. Zapped is smarter then you may know :) Also koolranch is a douche, don't worry about him. Things will get better. :)

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If you want to talk, I am here and I do not judge, I used to cut too

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Umm no, that's not even close. when I cut , I felt alone and I needed someone to talk to (upon other stuff) talking is the best way to handle it.

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thanks<3 how did you stop?

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Where are the cuts?? It depends on where they are to how you should I hide them!? But I do agree, and strongly suggest you to stop self-harming please.

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I know cuttings bad but i cant help it koolranch. and i really appreciate it The1ginger, how did you stop?

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Mostly will power, and I got on here, and talk to people about it. Which in real life would be hard because I am a mute. Opening up to some makes alot of differance. I also used to cut to calm down but now I draw or write it down. I also moved in with my dad, because my mom was a big part of my cutting.

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Well it was your generation who raised us... I also did, I draw now.

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Sorry one more comment, cutting can become an addiction, like drinking and smoking. Its away to get a released. In to be honest just like any addiction it is hard to get rid of. But it has to be done, with LOVE not hate

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my arms and legs

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im trying to stop i just really dont want to talk to my mom about it..thanks<3

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thank you

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the connotation of "stupid" usually suggests the thing is also "bad". if not then you would be using stupid in a positive way which it doesnt seem as though you are. and i never said it was a valid excuse, if it was a valid excuse then i wouldnt feel so damn bad about it. I know what i go through is nothing compared to many people, and i know that even if i had the literal worst life situation possible it still would not present a valid excuse for inflicting harm upon myself. Please realize i don't do this because im proud of it, because im not.

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Koolranch, stop being a troll

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and i would never "blame" my parents.

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im not stupid koolranch, im a kid. we do stupid ****, but this isnt one of the stupid **** we do. this is an addiction, a coping method and im aware that its a problem but i cant just put my knife down and leave it there so just lay off

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I'm going to be completely honest. I cut in 5th grade yeah I know young. Then I stopped bc my mom found out. Then I started again bc I found out he watched **** & I loveher so much. I never told mom she just found out. So yeah, I'm cutting again. I don't do it on my wrist–to obvious. I do it high on my stomach and high on my thigh–so I can wear shorts in the summer. The best advice I can give you is DO NOT tell your mom she will feel she is a bad mother. Get some neosporin or healing ointment and apply that twice a day or according to directions. Tell a friend they can help, someone who won't tell. Or get a diary and pour your feelings out

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