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I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years and 7 months. I've never loved anyone so much in my life, but there are times when I think...does he still love me? And why don't I feel the same about him like I did two years ago? I want to rekindle our love, but I'm scared to do something wrong. We talk, which helps us tremendously, but I feel like that's it. We're "just" talking, not really getting into the full swing of love...please help me.
SecretC SecretC 16-17, F 3 Answers Nov 3, 2012 in Romance & True Love

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Oh, those butterflies are crazy-wonderful to feel, aren't they? And that is likely why relationships don't last as long as some folks would like because that's what they're after--the sheer thrills of that first electric zing, thinking that's what love really is. <br />
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Yeah, it's love, sure...puppy love, as the oldies song goes. As you get to know the guy, can you really truly feel genuine, passionate love for him, "warts n all"? Absolutely. You just gotta work at it. That's why so many love advice folks say keep going on romantic dates...find the romantic in the smaller things. Sure, the big gestures are nice...but why depend on the guy to make romantic gestures? <br />
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It sounds to me like you've gotten comfortable with this guy, for sure. And that's a good thing...but I do understand about wanting to keep on feeling those thrilling vibes. I recommend writing down all the things that pull on your heartstrings, no matter what. Is it his smile and encouraging words when you're down? Is it the way he makes you laugh? Anything will do...and yes, you can include how good-looking he is. No restrictions on the love-kindling words, here! (The Power of the Word is undeniable to the psyche, especially when it is POSITIVE!) You didn't mention any long-term fighting or anything, so it sounds like you're on a fairly even keel, I think. Relationships like this DO take work to keep the electricity going...a lightbulb cannot be powered without electricians working on the grid to keep it stable. So it is, too, for a relationship. You're the electricians, keep the grid humming! :-D

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Same thing happened to me. I was with my guy for a bit longer than 2 years, and I broke up with him because I just didn't feel anything for him anymore.<br />
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Anyways, I feel that if you wanted to fall in love again, you need to talk about why you fell out of love. Also, you should find ways to make yourself feel like you used to; remind yourself why you guys started dating.

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How would I find ways to feel like I used to? I'm at a loss with all of this. Thank you for your answer by the way, it opened my eyes.

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I was at a loss too, but I just decided to end it. Anyways, what are some things you guys did together when you started dating? If you tried doing those things again, maybe some old feelings will resurface.
Also, even trying new things with your man could start some new sparks.

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the honeymoon is over, you can never go back to where you were.

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Honeymoon? We're not married, we're seniors in high school...

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What i ment was, honeymoon refers to the fun times at the beginning of a relationship, then you learn more about the person and you can never see them in that light again.

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See I had a feeling you were using the whole honeymoon thing metaphorically. Well thank you for your input, sparkle and fade, huh? Like a shooting star.

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It's sad but true.... You can't really feel how you did in the beginning with all the butterfly's in your stomach and stuff. If you think you don't love him anymore and are trying to make yourself love him then it's just not gonna work...

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I love him, I really do. You just explained it perfectly well for me...the whole butterfly's thing, yeah. That was what I meant. I miss those feelings of excitement whenever I saw him, but then again we were just kids.

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you still are kids.

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You sound just like my mom. She always remind us both to not rush into things, that we're 'still kids' and I know she's right...

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listen to your mom, you gotta whole lot of living to do yet. dont rush things enjoy your life now cause it dont get much better.

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Thank you. I really, really appreciate you'r input. I'll keep all that you have said to me in mind, I won't rush things either. Thank you and have a good night or morning.

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